Husband refusing to speak to me...

[timeandtide]

I have a DD who is 2.

Her childcare currently looks like this:

Monday: MIL looks after her
Tuesday: my mum looks after her
Wednesday: MIL looks after her
Thursday: my mum looks after her

I'm off on a Friday.

My MIL also looks after my sister in law (husband's sister) DD on a Tuesday so she's looking after children three days a week but they're never with her at the same time. Nevertheless my DH and I have decided that we would like to relieve some pressure on MIL by putting my DD into nursery on a Monday to take the pressure off her a bit and she's happy with this. My DH also wants to put DD into nursery on a Tuesday (my Mother's Day) but my own mum has said she's fine with the two days as she has my dad around and they're fit and able and enjoy it. I had compromised with my DH that maybe the afternoon on a Tuesday would be OK but even then I was hesitant. He started to fill out the form this morning and I said to hang fire with the Tuesday til I double checked with my mum if she wanted a morning or afternoon free. When I spoke with my mum she stressed again that she really didn't find the two days a problem and she'd rather save DH and I the £110 a month for half day care and keep her all day as she takes her to toddler group and DD still naps.

Anyway, DH is now not speaking with me as I have "broken the compromise". I am trying to tell him that people are trying to help us and save us over £1200 a year in childcare and there would be people out there biting someone's hand off to be able to save on childcare.

AIBU??

You need to find out why your H wants your daughter at nursery 2 days a week.

Your DH is being a twit, more so now that he's 'threatening' to not even consider helping out sort cover should your mum happen to get sick/have something come up once in a while.

I'd be furious with him, tbh.

Since when was ignoring people the adult way to manage family discussions? FFS tell him he;s a parent now and he cant pull stunts like this any more.

inci read my pp we've never put any parents under pressure to look after my DD

Would it make any sense to swap days so your DD goes to MIL on Tuesdays with her cousin and MIL still only does two days a week?

But yes, your DH is being childish. Point out that £1200 a year savings gives the family a decent holiday.

Your DH needs to get a grip. Seriously.

My DP pulls a bitch fit at the simplest things but I'd laugh him off if he stropped over this! (Which btw he wouldn't)

augusta we did think about this but my niece is only 8 months (SIL only took 6 months mat leave) and I think it's too much to ask for her to take my daughter who is still in nappies and runs everywhere and generally a normal two year old along with a crawling and teething baby. I think we're happier just saying thanks for helping so much but have a day back to yourself. My DH has got up this morning and is acting like nothing has happened