AIBU to let them eat when they're hungry????

[happylittlefish]

Basically, have 4 teens - all terribly thin with massive appetites! Cant satisfy them! Friend came over today and spent the whole day here. Only had the 14 yo here (others were out) and friend feels the need to tell me that I shouldn't let him keep eating because its 'too much'. This really upset ds - he already has body image issues which he's overcoming. He's really thin but always hungry. This is what he's had today:

4 Weetabix, cup of milk, banana
Apple, grapes, flapjack
Chicken sandwich, crisps, cucumber sticks, babybel, yogurt, pepperami, cereal bar
Slice of toast with peanut butter, cup of milk, strawberries
HM spaghetti Bolognese (big portion), salad
Grapes, mini cookie pack, cup of tea, some sweeties, raspberries

This is typical. Friend - I felt - was really rude. She mentioned 'cutting down his intake'!!

Is this a normal amount for a 14year old?? What do your pre teens/teens eat in a day? Are they all so thin?

Isn't it terribly rude for a so called friend to tell you how to raise your family
Teenage boys eat masses of food it's fine

Was it your friend or his friend who told you he should be eating less?
Either way they have overstepped the mark and I would have said so to them in front of son.
Boys eat loads! Teenagers eat loads! Everything he was and now is eating sounds healthy and he obviously is.
Ignore all the food police, you know you are doing the right thing.

God these kids must be poo ing 10 times a day

If your son is thin what is the problem?

happylittlefish he's not underweight, he's very tall, 5'11 and size 13 feet and still growing quickly, isn't sporty at all, but today, whilst he's not been at school, it's been a pizza for tea, that's all, I've begged and pleaded all day to get him to eat something but pizza was all he would eat.

he's been like this for many years, my two DD aren't like this, they don't eat huge amounts but a huge variety, their 2 and 7

his school had to stop him of buying crisps etc and I have to pay his money to the school for them to make sure he's getting food and not spending his dinner money on sweets in the shop, he does have complex needs and does need extra help but food is a huge huge problem

I'd cry with relief if he ate a plate of spaghetti bolognese or even a mouth full of fruit

doctors say not to worry because he's still growing and not under weight, and won't do anything.

yours seem to have a amazing diet and I'd tell your 'friend' to mind her business

My 13 DD would just eat constantly if she could.

She used to eat virtually nothing, i had her down the doctors as she seemed to live on fresh air and sunshine. We went away last august and she went from pick to shovel.

Today shes got through
Eggs, bacon, toast and mushrooms.
Cheese on toast, yoghurt, fruit and mars bar ice cram bars.
Lamb koftas, salad, garlic bread and a bucket of jelly.
Ham and cheese wraps and cheesy garlic mash.

Shes 5'4", legs upto her armpits and is about 7 stone soaking wet.

She demolished a lamb shank challenge on holiday and they gave her an ice cream sunday (and rest of the week) instead of the bucket of beer they normally offered.

yanbu I could eat the contents of my fridge every day and not put on weight at that age

wish I still could!

OP, your DC have a really healthy diet, I wouldn't worry.

The only problem is the cost! I have 3DC, two teens and a tween. I spent £225 in Tesco and it only lasted about a week and a bit :(
Even just the 5 (or 7) a day, x family of 5 x week = 175-245 portions of fruit and veg. It's a lot!

No it sounds fine and very healthy as well OP especially for a teenager.

But your friends son is getting no where near enough,he'd only had 2 meals from what you wrote down.

All 5 of our DC love they're food and our oldest DS20 and DS14 and DD12 can't put weight on no matter how much they eat,all 5DC are very tall and the 3 I mentioned are all really thin.
They need the calories at that age,they're growing so much.

Sounds normal to me. My 16 year old is slim, but works out so quite muscly an never stops bloody eating. An to be fair, you have got quite a bit of fruit an veg in the mix, I wouldn't worry and would tell your 'friend' not to be so rude!

I fondly remember my 15 year old brother eating two humongous roast dinners (mum's portions, huge), finishing off the carrots in a carrot sandwich and then eating half a large Cartmel Sticky Toffee Pudding and custard.

He was 6'2 and skinny.

YANBU. My 8 and 11 year olds eat like that but in smaller portions. They're also skinny. They're always hungry.

Sounds completely normal for teens...everyone is different but so much growing going on and hollow legs to fill. Understand your pal may have been alarmed...but she should never compare her kid with yours. Your ds is obviously doing fine, enjoying his sport and keeping up his energy levels. My (soon to be 14 yr old) ds is also sporty, skinny but toned, and permanently hungry. Has always been able to go for tea at a friend's and then come home and eat a full dinner with us as well. Just roll your eyes at her if it is just her talking out her arse...but let your boy know she's wrong. No harm in him looking again at his sugar content etc. but that is his choice...not hers.

P.s. Am dead impressed at marvellous array of snacks on offer in your house...our cupboards are always bare according to ds...and I gave up buying convenient snacky stuff round about the time I stopped carrying a change of clothes and paper and pencils everywhere we went. You kind of have to fend for yourself here or embark on your own journey of culinary discovery.

My 4 all eat more than that! Your friend needs to STFU ;)

It's not the amount of food that's a problem with anyone, it's just making sure that most of it is healthy.
My 12 year old son will have
4 rounds of toast with Philadelphia (breakfast)
banana, strawberrys, Apple ( mid morning snack)
Large portion of whole meal pasta, with a homemade sauce and vegetables and a side salad which will have 1/2 a cucumber, 2 tomatoes,a red pepper and grated carrot.(lunch)
Crackers, cheese and salad, grapes and pineapple.(snack)
3 chicken thighs with a homemade sauce with steamed broccoli and carrots, boiled potatoes and peas.(dinner)
Fruit cocktail, yoghurt (dessert)
Shreddies with milk, (snack)
Porridge with blueberries (supper)
He is 5'4 and around 7 stone.
He can eat as much healthy stuff as he likes, unhealthy food is limited.

My 12 year old once came home from an all you can eat and went straight to the fridge 😂 That's growing teens for you!

They don't just need calories to power them through the day like adults. They are still growing and need the intake so they can grow bones and muscles. The difficulty will be cutting down in a few years time if they end up in an office job with limited time for sport.

The amount of sport the OP describes will burn a couple of thousand cals anyway. My ex was an army diving instructor. When they did the Arctic courses they were given rations of 8000 calories a day as they were so active and burning calories to keep warm. Very active people need a lot of food!

Big bowl of granola with full fat yoghurt
School dinner
Small Snack
Pasta & salad
Couple of pieces of chocolate
He's 12 and would still struggle to eat an adult portion