AIBU to think Brangelina would NOT live here? (Rightmove)

[Bambooshoots14]

DH stumbled across this cracker of a description

If Brangelina and their brood wanted to buy a house then they could not do much better than this fantastic five bedroom, three receptions, two bathroom family home with lovely landscape garden to rear and optimum parking to front.

www.rightmove.co.uk/property-for-sale/property-59736347.html

Haha, I can really see Brangelina living in Croydon. Popping into IKEA for some meatballs and riding some trams.

Reminds me of a Go West song

Haha, amazing! For comparison, here is just one of their actual houses: pursuitist.com/brad-pitt-angelina-jolie-buy-16-million-london-dream-home/

But who can resist that open plan lounge/diner? George Clooney could pop round for dinner while the kids watch telly.

Brangelina did actually consider this house but thought it was too near Jennifer Anniston's new gaff in Croydon

I'm trying to 'hear' the conversation in the Jolie-Pitt household.

"Let's buy a house in England."
"Yes, great idea. Where?"
"Knightsbridge? Chelsea? The Cotswolds?"
"Um, I'm not sure."
"How about South Croydon?"
"Yaay, you're on!"

George Clooney could pop round for dinner while the kids watch telly.

very funny and unique, had me looking :) not buying it for the jolie pitts though way too small.

It's the one Brad will be forced to live in after she's taken him to the cleaners during the divorce.

Another good option for her and the kids :)

waterfordwhispersnews.com/2016/09/21/angelina-jolie-straight-down-the-council-for-a-house/

Badgers you may be assuming Brad is of higher net worth than Ms Jolie - maybe its the other way around?

I don't know though. If she stuck a tennis court in the garden and bunged a conservatory on..... I reckon she has prob made a tentative offer already.

If there's a doghouse out the back, it might just be perfect.

Do EAs actually write their own house descriptor copy, or is there a particularly inarticulate sub-specialism that does it? Why are they almost always so awful, usually barely literate and with weird EA language tics like 'the property benefits from a...' (when what they mean is 'this house has a kitchen') and then weird leaps into total surrealism like this?

Or are we to imagine a wistful fantasist EA trapped in the office and dreaming of a Hollywood career and in his/her head matching suburban semi-detacheds in Croydon with A-listers?

They're trying to jump on the current news, hoping that a google search for 'Brad and Angelina' will bring their listing up. Pretty tragic attempt.

At least the EA has a sense of humour. I thought it was quite funny.