To be annoyed that DH can never take time off work to do any childcare but is happy to finish early to watch football?

[JumblyWumbly]

As per the title really.

DH and I are both self employed but he will never take any time off if the kids are ill, or if I have a meeting that clashes with school collection time, or during school holiday time. He's always far too busy and won't even really engage in any discussion about it.

However he's more than happy to take time off work if he wants to do something; long stag weekends, days out doing his hobby, and this afternoon off to the pub to watch football so he finished early today.

AIBU to be fucked off that he chooses to do this?

Our men work in pairs with one vehicle between them. They havecto work according to site hours.

Did you all miss the bit where he was self imployed and could take time off for stuff HE ENJOYED?

Balletgirl i'm not sure of your point. There are plenty of jobs where people, including the female kind, would have a tough time getting out of work to deal with a sick child. However this is not the case here. This man is self employed. Also, if your men needed to go, they would go. Work isnt the be all and end all when there is a family emergency.

yanbu this isn't what a partnership or joint parenting is about.

What Runrabbit said. It's not a good example for your children to see either. If you carry on enabling him to behave like this, deep resentment will fester.
Not good for any relationship or family dynamics.

Yanbu at all.

I'd be tempted to say "I bumped into Sam and Jack the other morning and they asked if you would be free the first weekend in August to go away, do you think you could be?" And if he says yes say "good. That was a lie; I've a weekend away booked. Glad to hear you are able to free yourself up."

Desperate times call for desperate measures. Or divorce

YANBU. Have a meeting and divide up the drop-offs, pick ups etc and do the same with sick days and holidays. Because, you know, it's either do it like this now or do it like this after a divorce.