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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think If you see someone fall you check they are ok.

53 replies

MsColouring · 12/06/2016 13:29

Embarrassing - I fell over on my run yesterday (I am not terribly well do-ordinated). Was next to a park and there was a family right next to where I fell loading up their car who totally ignored me and someone else a bit further down the road. Was quite surprised no-one checked I was ok - I got up and carried on.

Dh reckons they just didn't say anything coz they realised I was embarressed.

OP posts:
JacquesHammer · 12/06/2016 18:15

I had another horrid incident involving the police when I was 20. So again - too nervous to help really.

Therewere5inthebed · 12/06/2016 18:21

I couldn't imagine not offering assistance to someone who had fallen or who was obviously in some sort of predicament.. I tend to treat others as I would like to be treated myself.

NavyAndWhite · 12/06/2016 18:23

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

calamityjam · 12/06/2016 18:23

quite a few years ago, I was out with my dsis her dp and dh. Some teenagers started an argument with the men that turned into the gang of teens (huge gang of 20 or more) violently assaulting them. My dsis was shouting at them to stop whilst I ran for help. Several men in a local pub came to the door to observe but nobody helped. Not even when one of the male teens dragged my obviously pregnant sister to the ground by her hair.

ZigZagIntoTheBlue · 12/06/2016 18:28

I tripped on uneven ground at 9 months pregnant and my 4 yr old had to help me up ! I really struggled to stand up too as I'd gone down hard on both knees and an elbow, other hand was holding my ds1 hands as we'd just crossed a road. Witnessed by big group of teenagers, they nudged each other then looked away as I eventually stood with the grace of a beached whale Hmm

MrsDoylesTeaParty · 12/06/2016 18:30

I would definitely ask if they were okay and then if they were, make them feel at ease and make a joke. It IS embarrassing to fall but what makes it worse is when people quietly laugh to themselves... Grin

FuckOffJeffrey · 12/06/2016 18:38

YANBU. I always ask if someone is ok if they fall over, it's an automatic reaction. 99.9% of the time most people are ok but a little embarrassed. It's always better to check as they might need help.

I remember when I was heavily pregnant (I must have been about 8 months) I fell in McDonald's a shop. It had been raining and the floor was wet. It was lunchtime in a busy city centre so the place was full of people but not one person asked if I was OK. At least a dozen people witnessed me fall. I struggled to get back on my feet due to the size of my bump and had to sort of roll myself a few times to get on my side. I was very grateful I landed in my back rather than my front but I was quite shaken up about it.

CaptainCallisto · 12/06/2016 19:36

When I was about 18, I was walking home from work at about six in the evening. Week before Christmas, hideous storm (high winds, rain and sleet going horizontally - awful!), packed street. I saw an elderly lady get blown over about 50 yards ahead, then at least twenty people walk past her.

Her shopping had gone everywhere and people were stepping over it to get past Angry

I started to run over, and a man was running to help from the other direction. He picked up her shopping and gave her his coat, while I sat with her and asked if she was hurt etc. We ended up sitting with her for half an hour trying to keep her warm while we waited for an ambulance. The poor thing had broken her wrist and badly bruised her ribs.

I will never forget that feeling of sheer disbelief as I watched all those people, who could have got to her first, walk by...

BigChocFrenzy · 12/06/2016 21:17

I always stop to ask if they are ok and I offer help if needed. Unless they were already bouncing back on their feet.
A fall can mean broken bones, especially for the elderly, or being very shaken and needing reassurance.
If injured, they may not be able to phone for an ambulance, or state properly where they are.
A few moments kindness can make such a difference.

Grim that so many people don't stop.

Onenerfwarfrombreakdown · 12/06/2016 21:29

I remember a previous OH telling the story of being a tall gangly teenager about 14/15, jumping on the tube in London for an appt (different line/direction to his usual route to school), misjudging and absolutely clanging his head off a steel pole. He went down, passed out for a few seconds then very dizzy and not able to sit up. Nobody came to help. People stepped over him to get on and off. Eventually a few stops later he clambered to his feet and got a seat. Nobody asked if he was ok. Yukky behaviour from everyone.

Stanky · 12/06/2016 21:42

I remember when I stabbed myself by accident with a sharp object in my thigh aged 14. Blood was pouring down my leg and the wound was deep. I was alone on the pavement, I couldn't walk, I had no phone. I remember a lady in a sports car slowed down to look at me. I made eye contact with her pleading for help, and she turned her head and drove away. Luckily, another lady heard me crying from her house, and called my mum, and I was taken to hospital.

Gardenbirdy · 12/06/2016 21:44

I helped a young lad (maybe 11-12 ish) when he slipped on ice on the pavement a few years ago when we had that really icy winter. Despite being obviously just a woman out shopping (with bags to prove it - I was on my way home) he was so uncomfortable taking my arm or touching me in any way - despite being unable to walk unaided - that I ended up leaving him on the pavement and going to his house to get his mum! Thankfully he only lived around the corner but it made me a bit sad that he was so distrusting of me.

Gardenbirdy · 12/06/2016 21:47

(To clarify above - he lived so near to where he'd fallen that I thought I'd take him home rather than call an ambulance)

mrscee · 12/06/2016 21:54

I recently slipped over quite spectacularly it all happened in slow motion and it really hurt and a lady driving passed at the time stopped to see if I was ok. I always check to make sure they are ok if I see someone fall. I think it's a bit rude not too.

emsiewill · 12/06/2016 22:00

I fell when running on a residential road a couple of years ago. A lovely lady came to see if I was OK, I got a bit teary and she drove me home. I was very grateful & luckily bumped into her not long after & was able to thank her properly. I will never forget her kindness & would hope to pay it forward if the occasion arose.

green18 · 12/06/2016 22:01

Always. It would be out of my mouth before I had time to think. It's just instinct to me. Btw it's the same instinct that gets me into trouble when I tell hooligans and litter louts off!

MilkTwoSugarsThanks · 12/06/2016 22:09

Depends how close and whether I think the person may be injured or not. Also depends on what else I'm struggling with at the time.

A runner who gets back up? Nah.

PovertyPain · 12/06/2016 22:49

I don't care who has fallen, my natural instinct is to help. I've helped homeless people who are have fallen due to drink and placed a couple of people in recovery positions when they are passed out on the pavement after chucking out time. On both occasions, with the young, drunk people I've sat with them until their friends came along. With one of the homeless people I phoned the non emergency number as he was beside a really busy road and kept trying to walk and falling off the kerb.

My sister fell once, when out with me. She was 9mnts gone, massive, and not one fucker stopped to help me get her to her feet. Angry

JammyGem · 12/06/2016 22:52

I know exactly how you feel OP. I tore the ligaments in my ankle after stupidly falling down the kerb in front a waiting bus and the (very long) queue. I got up, got through the crowd and sat on the bus stop bench and fainted. Decided to get the next bus as I couldn't stand up.

Not one of those fuckers in the queue asked if I was OK. Ended up going to the walk-in the next day, where I ended up being given walking aids then shoved in a taxi to A&E.

MangoMoon · 12/06/2016 23:00

YANBU!
I fell over 2 weeks ago - stone cold sober, early evening, just walking along a particularly busy bit outside the cinema.

I was mortified Blush
loads of spectators - everyone close by were lovely though (although I'm sure they sniggered after I'd gone...!)

I lasted 3 days before I gave in and went to the doctors as my wrist was so painful.
Broken bloody wrist.
I now have a sodding cast on for the foreseeable future SadAngry

I always go to help people who fall, so was grateful that others helped me too.

Mycatsabastard · 12/06/2016 23:00

Yes, always.

Dp and I were shopping and a lady fell. From a distance you'd have thought she was ok. Up close she clearly had several broken or dislocated fingers (at very odd angles) so Dp got the car and drove her to A&E. We also got a number of a relative to call to arrange for them to go there too so she wasn't alone.

I remember falling when pregnant. My ankle turned over while crossing the road and I fell badly and ended up on my back, lying on my bag. Foot was agony and being so far gone, couldn't actually move at all. I saw a car coming and I thought Great, help has arrived. No. It slowed down, very carefully drove round me and kept going! It was a man having his dinner who looked out a window who came to my rescue! (X-ray later confirmed a broken bone in my foot).

liz70 · 12/06/2016 23:20

I once slipped and badly (needing surgery) dislocated and broke my ankle whilst walking on a cliff path. Imagine lying on your back with your knee and shin pointing skywards, but your foot and toes at an exact right angle because your ankle has snapped and your foot been twisted around that way. That was me.

A lady who was walking by at the time stopped and stayed with me as I lay in the mud, while my mum walked back down into the town to get help (no mobile phone signal up there). She covered me with her coat to keep me warm, held me up under my arms to stop me slipping down the muddy slope and putting pressure on my foot and ankle, and talked to me to keep my spirits up. It took an hour before an ambulance got to me - it didn't take me to hospital; that was by helicopter a further hour later - but at least I was given morphine and wrapped up warmly in a stretcher.

This lady stayed with me the entire time until medical help came. She was an absolute saint, and I am indebted to her.

Pollyputhtekettleon · 12/06/2016 23:23

If you fell and didn't immediately move to get up I'd help you! I did tell 'stop the car' and seed adage legging it back up the street to help an elderly man who had fallen in the street last week.

Elderly man was lying on the pavement painting the bottom of his wall.

BluePitchFork · 12/06/2016 23:24

I would at least ask if you were ok if I didn't see someone else asking first.

Pollyputhtekettleon · 12/06/2016 23:24

I did yell 'stop the car' and send DH....

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