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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

DS work experience and exdp

16 replies

shockandawe · 10/06/2016 11:50

Ds1 is finding his work experience tough going. He has done his first week and has one more to go.

His father and I share 50/50 contact, and he is with his dad this week but I've been doing pick ups/drop offs as it's quite a distance away and ex can't do them due to work etc.

Anyway, I told DS nearly half way through and to keep going. However his dad is encouraging him to switch to somewhere else, as he had 2 different work experience placements when he was a child.

I'm peeved that ex is saying this to ds. I told ds that he'll be letting people down and he has a duty to finish his commitment.

Aibu or is ex here?

OP posts:
Mirandawest · 10/06/2016 11:51

I'd say he should stick it out. Does he have somewhere else lined up for next week, if he were to stop doing this one?

MrsSpecter · 10/06/2016 11:52

No he made a committment, its only a week of his life, he has to finish it unless he is veing bullied or asked to do things he shouldnt be doing.

shockandawe · 10/06/2016 11:53

No, it'll be hurried, but there are spaces at a local charity shop who ds's friend is working at having an easy time.

OP posts:
RaeSkywalker · 10/06/2016 11:53

Why is he finding it tough? If he's being treated badly then maybe your ex has a point.

If it's just that he's finding it hard/ tiring, he should keep going.

PiranhaBrothers · 10/06/2016 11:55

It's only one week. Your ex-dp encouraging him to change placements is pathetic. Does he want him to grow up to be the sort of waster who leaves jobs after a week because he's(initially) finding it tough going?

shockandawe · 10/06/2016 11:58

It is at a goat sanctuary, so lots of hay/poo clearing. Because the weather is warm it's very smelly and lots of flies.

I've met the goats the other day when collecting him. They are all rescue animals, and so affectionate. He is worked hard but what did he expect?

OP posts:
MrsSpecter · 10/06/2016 11:59

So its just because its smelly and warm? Yeah he needs to stick it out.

shockandawe · 10/06/2016 12:01

He is interested in Marine Biology but also animal welfare and this was his favoured placement. Other students picked it but ds and one other were chosen.

I told him he couldn't switch and to see it through. I feel it's his duty to be reliable and see through his obligations.

He was "bullied" the other day by some Pygmy goats, who wanted his lunch!

OP posts:
pilates · 10/06/2016 12:01

I would advise him to stick at it, it won't look good on his character to give up.

shockandawe · 10/06/2016 12:04

My thoughts exactly. I really thought his dad would be saying the same thing here.

OP posts:
Baconyum · 10/06/2016 12:05

He needs to stick it out. Even the most favoured jobs in the world have downsides.

RaeSkywalker · 10/06/2016 12:15

Yes, he needs to stick it out. This is probably a decent insight into what 'starting at the bottom' in an animal care environment is like.

He wanted to do it and was chosen over others. He's made a commitment- to what I'm guessing is a charitable organisation? He needs to see it through.

shockandawe · 10/06/2016 12:18

Thanks all.

I'm sure he'll learn from this.

OP posts:
moosemama · 10/06/2016 12:51

I'd say he needs to stick at it. It's a valuable lesson about how hard working with animals can be and it's good for him to know that before selecting qualifications to go into that line of work.

I used to work in animal rescue and the number of newly qualified people we had through like a revolving door, because they couldn't hack the hard work and drudge involved was astounding. They had all the knowledge and did genuinely care about the animals, but had no real clue about what the work actually involved.

I did a lot of voluntary work before going into it, starting at the age of 12 and was well aware of the good, bad and ugly involved from a very young age. Voluntary work/experience is also looked upon really favourable by the larger welfare charities.

WreckingBallsInsideMyHead · 10/06/2016 12:57

He definitely needs to stick it out! He chose this placement and made a commitment and needs to stick to it. Afterwards he may reconsider what he wants to do after school, but it's a week of his life, he shouldn't quit.

Pinkheart5915 · 10/06/2016 13:04

I'd say he needs to stick it, he chose his placement and needs to complete it instead of changing to somewhere else or the charity shop you mention because it's easier.
In life we all do things we find tough, he will learn something from this experience

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