A couple of years ago my 83 yr old neighbour would knock on my door when he could hear violence. His timely knocks saved me from some horrible situations. I've since reminded him and thanked him but Alzheimer's has kicked in and he doesn't remember.
I've been doing some neighbourly things for him over the last few months, appointments and organising transport etc. Now the plants are growing I've cut our joint hedge, his front lawn, and today his back lawn.
I caught him as I was popping to the shoo and said I would take a look when I got back. He said he wanted to give me something for it. I said no. He kinda implored, then suggested five pounds. So, I said great five pounds, mostly so that he could feel like he was paying and to end the awkward conversation.
I mowed the lawn. It was knee high and took nearly three hours, which was what I was expecting really. I felt great for having done it. Proud of myself. Now I feel terrible.
I tried to avoid the fiver but needed my extension lead. He pressed some money in to my hand. As it was change wrapped I a note I could feel it was more than the fiver so I said, we agreed a fiver. He said no, you agreed a fiver. Then he sort of alluded to having done alright for himself when younger. I said if there was more than a fiver there I'd post it back through the door. He seemed a little hurt and said he would have had to get someone to do it if I hadn't so I left with a suggestion of sharing an icecream in the garden the next sunny evening.
He gave me £25. He lives in a ha house, collects a state pension (I know as I helped in gill out a form that need the code off his letter). I have no idea if he has other money but it seems kind of unlikely. He worked as a truck driver and that kind if thing.
What if he forgets he gave it to me, and thinks he's lost it or I've stolen it. He forgets a lot now, asked me if my name was Lucy today for instance and we speak multiple times a week since I moved here three weeks ago. I don't feel good about doing the garden now, whereas I did have a lovely sense of achievement and kind of paying him back for saving me those times.
Should I ignore any potential embarrassment he might feel for having things done for him for free and do what I suggested- put the extra £20 in a card through his door with a note to explain that the fiver was what we agreed? Is that what you would do?
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19 replies
DecaffCoffeeAndRollupsPlease · 09/06/2016 22:37
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