To insist dd goes on this camp?

[Dancergirl]

13 year old dd went on a winter camp over the new year with a youth group. She hadn't been before but knew a couple of girls going and had a great time. She talked about it for weeks afterwards and said she wanted to go on the summer camp they are running.

So a few months ago I booked the summer camp after checking with her she was sure. She said she was. Booked and paid the entire amount - £375.

Now she is having second thoughts but she's not exactly sure why. I phoned the organisation to find out their cancellation policy and apparently I can't get my money back, only an admin fee of around £50. And because they are camping they don't get over subscribed and don't turn anyone away.

So am I being unreasonable if I insist she goes? £300 is a lot of money to throw away.

I would reassure her and try and get her happy to go, but yeah I'd make her go.

Remind her of how much fun she has at the winter one and that it is likely to be even better in summer, but yes she should go, she is old enough to realise how much money that is and that is was her that wanted to go.

Yanbu she was given the choice she has to stick with it.

Probably last minute nerves. Does she still have friends going? It's usually friend issues at this age. Do a bit more digging and think about whether there is anything you can do to facilitate the friendships e.g. invite girls to your house before the trip, talk to organisers etc.

Are they camping properly, in tents - is she worried about toilet facilities or something? Is she likely to have her period (if she's started)?

I agree it could be anxieties around friends / body changes / communal showers, and she needs information and reassurance.

Just reassure her, it will be great and send her.

If she has specific concerns then see what you can do to address them, otherwise it's probably just nerves. Once she gets there and is with her friends she'll be having too much fun to dwell on second thoughts.

hedda one of the girls going dd is at school with and the friendship has lapsed a bit. I asked dd if that was the reason, she said 'partly' but isn't sure what the other part was. But they're a really nice group of kids and last time dd made lots of new friends.

At 13 if she didn't have additional needs id tell her to suck it up as you've spent the money.

You asked her, you checked with her for definite and she said yes. So she goes.