to feel a bit shit about my past sexual activity?

[Ledeluge]

Name change for this one.

Am having urgent scan tomorrow because apparently post menopausal bleeding is sometimes - around 10% of cases - a sign of cancer.

Firstly, I had no idea - I assumed that because you get random bleeding coming up to the menopause, it would not be a big deal after the menopause. I was quite taken aback by the reaction of health professional when I mentioned it. Is this common knowledge?

But also, having done a bit of research, I am now feeling a bit shit about my sexual history. Have been with DP for 28 years of blissful monogamy but did have quite a few partners in my youth. DP has only ever (well I'm taking a lot for granted here but pretty sure) had sex with me.

After my research today, my understanding is that I may well have HPV from my previous sexual history, putting me at greater risk for cervical cancer, and in that case, he may have HPV from me, putting him at greater risk of throat cancer?

AIBU to feel absolutely terrible about potentially having this impact on someone who has only ever slept with one woman?

Thank you all so much - this has been so reassuring and I think has sorted any lingering doubts about my colourful past! Was getting myself into a right state.

The scan today was of the womb lining and was clear - there will be other tests but I think this has ruled out the most likely cause of potential cancer, very good to have that out of the way.

Really interesting to read the debates about post menopausal bleeding - I was so taken aback by the strength of the nurse's reaction. As I said, with bleeding being a bit erratic leading up to menopause, I'd assumed a bit of spotting 14 months later was nothing to worry about. I think women's magazines are pretty good with info on hot flushes, weight gain and vaginal dryness but can't remember every hearing about the significance of post menopausal bleeding. Think I feel a campaign coming on.....

Thanks for all the supportive messages, much appreciated.

Ledeluge You sound much calmer in your latest post, and I hope everything gets resolved in the best way possible.

I'm just beginning the menopause myself, and hadn't previously heard that post-menopausal might be so significant. So thank you for the thread, it has been useful.

I'm pleased you've had some reassurance and are feeling happier x

Ledeluge Good to hear the scan was ok.

You are right about people not knowing about post-menopausal bleeding. I only found out about it from here and menopause matters (there are lots of pages of up to date menopause info to read there).

I had only read about hot flushes and that your periods stopped before I embarked on menopause. TBH, I did know about things like osteoporosis and vaginal atrophy from my biology study in my youth. But in reality, nothing is very clear cut and tidy so there is no definite beginning and no definite end. And the bluddy Vag At is the bane of my life [humph]