Aibu to be offended?

[sayamanara]

A man when very drunk compared me and supermodelfriend to first division and premier league, looks-wise?! What does this even mean.

How old are you?

(Guessing less than 24)

Such juvenile banter from both of you.

" Sounds very much like he was running you down a bit so you were more suscpetible to his charms. It's a tactic designed to make you think you need to impress him."

He must be incredibly tactical if he managed to get the op to bring up the subject, badger him to answer, then use his run her down tactic by trying to avoid the subject, then tactically get her to not give up on the subject before finally providing some sort of answer when he was drunk so that the op could finally take offence.

What a manipulative performance from him and it's definitely him who's the dick/twat/creep/take your pick and not the op

You sound really insecure OP. I'm sure you're prettier than you think, and it's destructive to compare yourself to supermodel friends. x

Doesn't soud like he was running you dowm, sounds like you were drunk and didn't get the answer you wanted.

I stupidly asked if he thought she was better-looking. He kept avoiding the question

Quimby why am I a dick/twat/creep

Yes I have of course fancied people who are not conventionally attractive and of course I know it's destructive to compare myself to those who are significantly more attractive than me. But as mentioned I felt compared to her the whole evening and for many reasons was at the most emotionally vulnerable I had ever been for a long time that night... Would no-one else honestly feel a bit shitty if they were compared to their friend the whole evening? I normally rise above it but couldn't this time. Yes I'm young, I'm mid-twenties. Old enough to know better ofc!

I believe the premier league used to be called first division.

I think people are getting mixed up between that and league one.

It goes:

Premier league
Championship
League 1
League 2
Conference

So OP I think he was saying you're on the same level.

I don't think Quimby was calling you those things.
Wasn't he/she just reflecting the names people have called the man.

Because calling him a dick when he was clearly squirming at being pressured to answer was a bit harsh from previous posters.

You should have told him everyone is beautiful in their own way but in his case you'll make an exception.

BooAvenue i dont think its very nice to say op may have been pretty 20 years ago (first division became premier league) but not any more

We're both 23!

you were probably cute aged 3. but not now. is what booavenue is suggesting

and felt a tad vulnerable as was being constantly compared to her

yeah right

I don't think he sounds like a twat at all. You were pestering him to answer a question differently than he already had, and he strived to be diplomatic and tactful. In effect he's said, well you might be a bit different, but you're both at pro level, so it's irrelevant. You caught him between a rock and a hard place. If he'd agreed with you that your mate was far prettier, he'd have been a twat. If he'd tried telling you you were much prettier than your mate, you'd have called him a liar, or perhaps taken offence on your friend's behalf.

All of that said, if anyone strolled up and offered the same opinion he did, without being asked (and pestered!) I would be calling them a twat.

Ithinkiamsinking I'm being serious. People were coming up to up her all night complimenting her etc (I'm used to this, she's beautiful and it's cool!) but sometimes it's a bit shit when you've made a lot of effort to look good and someone still effortlessly outshines you, constantly. Does no one relate at all?

People were coming up to up her all night complimenting her etc

felt a tad vulnerable as was being constantly compared to her

Yes.... I can see how these are the same

What's attractive: not obsessing about who is more attractive or even what is effing attractive

Don't knock Division One flower. Could have been Vauxhall Conference...

If he'd said that unprompted it would have been offensive and he'd have been a prick. But as it is you repeatedly asked him a question that there was no nice way of answering honestly and he did the very best he could to answer it as kindly and diplomatically as possible - after trying and failing to avoid answering it altogether. So no you have no right to be offended and you were the one being unreasonable for putting him in that uncomfortable position.

You sound as if you have low self esteem and are obsessed with appearances.
Why would you ask a man, or indeed woman that?
Did you want him to say ,"oh you're the most attractive"?

It sounds a right pain in the arse to have people coming up to you all night to tell you how beautiful you are! I think I'd rather be a bit less attractive and not get all the mither tbh

OP, yes I do understand. I have friends who are far more attractive than me and it used to be a bit crushing when they got constant attention and I got nothing.

What worries me is that you went back to the house of a man who was very drunk and who you weren't sure liked you. He might be really handsome or whatever but if you're doing that to try to feel better about yourself, it'll never work.

Often the most attractive people aren't beautiful, it's their confidence and personality that draws others to them.

Ah the facebook/Instagram/duckface selfie generation... everything is about appearances!

I can understand why 20 somethings can become insecure about their looks and wonder if they are constantly being compared on their appearance, holidays, clothes.

I am so glad this shit wasn't around when I was in my insecure 20s [old gimmer of 42]. I would have been unhealthily obsessed with my appearance too

Most people will know what it's like to not be the most attractive person in the room. It's fine. Why would I get upset about it?

Also, the kind of person who comes up to a complete stranger to compliment them on their attractiveness, lacks good manners and an inability to strike up an interesting conversation. Seriously, what are you missing out on?

I'd be far more annoyed that people kept interrupting our conversation.

Poor bloke!
If he'd walked up to you and came out with that comment for no reason then he'd be a complete twat; but to be badgered constantly to answer a question that has only one answer is awful.

If you want to be respected & not be viewed as needy then you need to stop this sort of behaviour.
If you fancied him & wanted to go back with him etc, fine - be assertive & do things because you want to.
If you are only going with people for validation, then stop.

Ywbu to allow yourself to obsess all night over someone being better looking than you. This man evidently demonstrated an interest in you, but you were busy feeling sorry for yourself and chose to keep focusing on your self pity.

Be glad that your biggest problem is that someone you know is really good looking.