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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Charging student for missed tuition session

79 replies

RangeTesKopeks · 28/05/2016 20:01

Hi everyone,

This is a bit of a WWYD situation, so I'd be really grateful for any advice you might have please Smile

I work as a tutor, and have been teaching French to a girl for a couple of months now, but fairly infrequently (we manage to fit in around a session a month).

At the start of May, the girl's parents had provisionally arranged for her to have a tuition session with me this morning.

I travel to the family's house for the tuition, and when I got there I rang the doorbell a couple of times but got no answer. I waited for a few more minutes and realised their car wasn't in the drive, so I rang the house phone. I could hear it ringing but no one answered. I also tried a mobile number for the family, and again got no answer so I left a message on the landline and mobile.

The family got in touch a couple of hours ago to say they were really sorry but were out at the time of the lesson. They said they'd tried to send me a text earlier this week to cancel today's lesson but that they've only just realised that the text didn't send.

I have a 24 hour cancellation policy, so if my students cancel without 24 hours' notice or don't turn up to my lessons, I charge them for the lesson.

Considering the family tried to send me a text message to cancel the lesson today, WIBU to charge them for the lesson?

OP posts:
Cagliostro · 29/05/2016 01:37

Sorry you've had that response Range :( I agree with those who've said they are trying to have it both ways - they can't say it was a provisional lesson AND say oh but we tried cancelling. Well which is it?! Hmm

Very frustrating for you. I think it would probably be best to just chalk it up to experience really. May be better than chasing it and risking your reputation if they slag you off to people.

LobsterQuadrille · 29/05/2016 07:25

I would be fuming at this. They knew that they had an obligation to cancel, which is why they "tried" to do so - that the text didn't send is completely irrelevant in my view. I would be inclined to either a) send a brief reply saying that it's unfortunate they feel this way but that you are in agreement with them as your time is limited and other students must take preference if lessons are not entered into whole-heartedly or b) ignore their message and email them the invoice as you would normally.

Then, as Cagliostro says, chalk it up to experience and try the block lesson upfront route in the future.

Charley50 · 29/05/2016 07:46

I would leave it now. People talk and you will get students through word of mouth recommendations. If they start slagging you off to people it could lead to less work for you.

Original poster
RangeTesKopeks · 29/05/2016 11:55

Hi everyone, just a quick update.

I didn't want to get into another debate/argument with the family, so have sent over an email basically saying: thanks for letting me know about the situation, I understand. All the best.

although I would've been tempted to send a slightly more PA message to let them know, basically, that their attitude stinks!!

Gahhh, anyone else been in this situation? Sorry to drag it up again - I'm over it now, but it's the principle of it that annoys me. People who want to have their cake and eat it REALLY get my goat Angry

OP posts:
leelu66 · 29/05/2016 12:03

You didn't give them the satisfaction of feeling vindicated by sending an angry response, so that's good. But you also need to find a way of not letting people take advantage you again, by drawing up rules and sending them via email so that they can't claim they weren't aware of your terms and also setting up pre-payment terms.

It's a shit feeling but it's all a learning curve 🙂

ilovesooty · 29/05/2016 12:32

I once had a counselling client I agree to see at home as he was too anxious to travel. First two sessions were fine. The third one he was held up at a business meeting when I turned up and his wife called him so he instructed her to pay me. The next session I turned up and there was no one at home. I hadn't been practising very long then but these days I'd send an invoice. His attitude was so disrespectful I'm still angry about it.

AugustaFinkNottle · 29/05/2016 12:32

So far as I'm concerned, if it's a provisional booking it needs to be confirmed by both sides. So in their shoes I would have expected you to check with them and not just turn up.

user1464519881 · 29/05/2016 12:34

Dentists, therapists, private doctors and many many other people have a cancellation policy. Some always send a text or call you the day before with a reminder and it is absolutely vital legally that you draw a cancellation policy to the attention of customers/clients in advance and in a way you can prove you did later. Then if someone is in A&E on the day you make an exception and if not then you charge them. Time is valuable.

Ah I see Lee has made my same point above about making sure people can br proven to have had details of a cancellation policy in advance. If you email it and not just have it buried in dense terms and conditions on a pdf attachment but perhaps in capitals near the middle of a short email then it will be easier to apply it later.

kitkat1968 · 29/05/2016 12:54

I think if the session was only provisionally arranged then you should have sent a text to confirm a few days before.
I don't know why people advised you to go in so heavy-handedly.This was obviously (to most people) going to be the inevitable outcome.

Original poster
RangeTesKopeks · 29/05/2016 13:07

Thank you so much for your replies everyone! Smile

I completely see and understand both sides of this. With hindsight (what a wonderful thing! Grin) I think that I should have sent them a text a few days before the lesson to fully confirm it. And then I would've been on much safer ground in terms of how secure and official the lesson booking was.

I've definitely learned lessons for the future from this - you've all been lovely and helpful (as always of course!! Wink) xx

OP posts:
parmalilac · 29/05/2016 14:49

I am a private tutor, to adults, and have also lost students because of this. I now insist on 1 month upfront with the 24 hour cancellation pref by email.

randomer · 29/05/2016 15:01

very interested in this ...as I have recently started working as a tutor ( with adults). I really make a huge effort in terms of planning and helping them. I send extra material if they are struggling. It seems to be a one way street though,as students drop out without much notice.
Can any other tutors share their tips please? How much do you charge?

byjimminey · 29/05/2016 15:15

My experiences as a parent trying to hire tutors hasn't been great to be honest. It takes a fair while to try and find a tutor yourself (unless you can pay serious money to a proper tutoring agency). I remember a few years ago taking my child to someones house for the weekly lesson as arranged and them not appearing to be in. Went home after ringing/knocking/waiting a fair while only for her to text the next day to say she was ill in bed and hopes never to let me down like that again. I think i didnt bother going back as I was really upset that we had walked a good 40 minutes there for no reason and had to turn around and do the same thing again.

More recently I have had the £35 an hour tutor (in her home) decide after 2 lessons that she was moving and wouldn't be able to tutor for a while but would be in touch (told my son as he was leaving her house, didn't bother to tell me). Never bothered to contact me until I sent her a fuming text (she didn't answer her phone to me). Others more recently have a habit of not turning up on time but perhaps being half an hour/an hour late (fine, you're stuck in traffic or whatever but please text and let me know!) Forgetting to come, promising to come but deciding to do something else but not bother to let me know. I am fine with them changing the day as I know that stuff happens but really, its quite frustrating when I am sometimes paying £45 for an hour and a half that I can really not afford anyway. I have had a tutor who would need constant reminders that they were coming. One week I forgot my usual 'are you still ok to come tomorrow at 6pm' text and so they didn't bother to come as I hadn't texted! It sounds like I have had loads of tutors, but I haven't, its just that some start and are so unreliable so I have to search for a new one!

I have asked to rearrange days sometimes, always a week in advance. I have asked for extra sessions if they would like to do it. I have never, in my memory, cancelled or not been home. I also don't expect a parents evening each lesson (or ever actually) and always make sure that I appear in the room 5 mins before the lesson ends to hand over money and thank them. I like the PAYG system because in my experience, its likely that the tutor would take the money and run or take the money and then constantly rearrange/turn up late an then Im stuck with them!

slightlyirritable · 29/05/2016 15:21

you've done the right thing- you can't make them pay up, but if they don't, you're entitled to end the arrangement. I used to be a tutor abroad and a small percentage of the students seemed to think I was just sitting around all day in case they showed. My time was of no value to them, so they didn't even consider contacting me to cancel, let alone paying for no-shows.

At the end of the day, if you're going to be out of pocket and had your time wasted, you might as well stop tutoring this girl, and if they do want you to continue, they will respect the rules

BigChocFrenzy · 29/05/2016 18:39

They want you to suck up the loss for their incompetence in not managing to properly send / check an important business text.
Don't let them take advantage.

EM the invoice and state they didn't actually send the cancellation.
You've nothing to lose; they are clearly finished with you and you are well rid.

For all new clients, plus your existing ones, try for advance block booking & payment. Too many people won't value your time properly.

listsandbudgets · 29/05/2016 18:54

Charge them. Dd once missed a violin lesson because she'd been admitted to hospital but we were still charged the full cost. The violin teacher kindly arranged a double session the next time though and only charged for one as she felt sorry for dd

PurpleDaisies · 29/05/2016 18:56

EM the invoice and state they didn't actually send the cancellation.
You've nothing to lose; they are clearly finished with you and you are well rid.

For the sake of what I assume is around £30 if really isn't worth the hassle. The potential damage to the op's reputation as a tutor from aggressively chasing the missed session money could be a big loss.

Celticlassie · 29/05/2016 19:01

Reply saying something along the lines of 'I agree that it's not really working, and as you are unable to adhere to the clearly set out t&cs I would have been unable to continue to work with your daughter anyway.'

And I never suggest arsey texts but in this case I think it's perfectly justified.

randomer · 29/05/2016 19:18

eek need to put up my prices!

byjimminey · 29/05/2016 19:22

I think prices depend on experience. I have seen people who are in University/on a gap year/just graduated who want to charge at least £30 an hour which I think is a joke. Actually, I think that a gap year student charging much more than £15 an hour is a bit of a nonsense really. Some teachers charge £40 or more for an hour which again is a bit much to stomach to be honest. It also means that its only quite well off people who can afford to have tutoring long term which again helps to create the divide at school.

Cagliostro · 29/05/2016 19:56

Haven't quite caught up with the thread yet but byjim WOW that is some seriously bad experiences! :(

As I said above, all but one of my (music) pupils comes to my house, but with the one who I visit at their home - about ten minutes walk - I will text even if I'm 2 minutes late. It's just polite and doesn't cost anything (or like 10p if you use a PAYG phone!), and I'd rather be overly polite (as in, I'd say sorry I'm late and she would say oh don't be silly it's only a few minutes!) than not polite enough.

Cagliostro · 29/05/2016 20:02

those are* not that is! Don't worry I'm not tutoring English Blush

Cagliostro · 29/05/2016 20:07

Agree there's no one price fits all for tutoring. Varies massively by area as well IME.

peggyundercrackers · 29/05/2016 20:32

I don't think they had a provisional booking because they expected you to be there, if it was a provisional why did they try to send a cancellation message?

I would do as others have suggested, take a booking upfront and paid for then if they don't turn up you can still charge them for it. I would also stop taking provisional bookings, they either book or they don't So it's absolutely clear where you both stand.

byjimminey · 30/05/2016 17:28

To add further to my tales of woe regarding tutors, I had one booked for today, even wrote it in my diary so I was sure we had booked a slot. Sent a text early to check the lesson was on. No response. No show. Nevermind, its only the exam next week. No need to take things seriously at all.