My DM and MIL treat my DH like a man child. He loves it. AIBU to hate it?

[LovelyBranches]

I have had to work away for a few days and leave DS with DH. My Dm and MIL seem to think that me being gone means they have to step in and take over. MIL stayed up my house for two nights as 'moral support' for DH. DM looked after DS for two days because DH was late for work on the one day he had to take DS to nursery. DM has cleaned the house and done the washing "because he's had it tough for the last few days" and both mothers have baked pies and pastries for DH to eat.

DH has lapped this up and loved all the attention. Yet I feel annoyed that he seems to have been treated like a big baby and that he cant be independent enough to look after our ds for a few days. I've now come home to a screaming DS because DM has spend the day giving him shit to eat and have been given a guided you around my house being told exactly what my DM has done 'for me' and how I should be grateful.

AIBU to think that in three days, my DM and MIL didn't need to take over so much and that DH should/could have been more independent?

[footballmum]

My MIL used to do this with my DH if ever I went away with my friends or was going to be very late back from work. To be fair to my DH he never asked or encouraged this and would point out to his DM that he was perfectly capable of feeding himself and DC. In the end I pointed out that when DH was frequently away on work trips no one came and cooked for me or invited me for tea. She's now mostly stopped but when I go away for the weekend with my friends she invites DH and DC for Sunday lunch but plates one up for me for when I get back home

[RainIsAGoodThing]

This would drive me mad. I could see it happening here to be honest - the only reason it doesn't is because MIL lives too far away and DM works full time.

At Christmas DP and I were discussing holidays with my parents and I told them about the 2 long weekends this year I have planned away with friends. She turned to DP with genuine distress and said 'oh you poor boy!' He's almost 30!

I don't get it at all, her and my dad aren't co dependent at all and went away separately fairly regularly when they were younger.

[AcrossthePond55]

My DH managed to cope just fine with 2 yr old and 6 year old DSs for 16 weeks when I had to be away for work. We did have a cleaner come in every two weeks but that wasn't 'new', we'd had her for years.

Our mothers did very little, other than the usual odd babysitting or overnight and inviting them over for meals.

My DH would have been insulted if he thought they believed he couldn't cope. I think it says more about the women who have to 'jump right in' than the men who accept help. It's an 'ego' thing, "See what a 'real woman' I am that I have to help this pitiful man?" because you just know they turn around and brag about how they 'had' to step in.