WIBU to leave kids alone whilst I go to the car

[GettingScaredNow]

About to become a single mum.
I have 2 dc, 4 and 21 months.
I live in a high rise tower block.
My flat is on a high up floor.
Building has 2 lifts that do alternate floors and obviously stairs all the way up.

I'm thinking of things like packing/unpacking the car for trips, holidays or even just a large shop. For shopping I'm going to look at a wheeled bag thing but I don't see this being a real issue as in reality I don't see myself buying so much I can't carry and herd DC at the same time.

But, for holidaying WIBU to put DC to bed, make sure they are asleep and then run bags down to the car?
If I can park outside the door then I would be gone in total around 3-5 minutes. (Per trip).

This would be so so much easier then having to do multiple trips with DC and attempt to pack the car while they at tamely to run away/kill each other/break the car.

On he one hand I think 'they are in bed, they are safe. I'm really close by'

On the other hand 'what if one of them does wake? What if a fire breaks out (I know this is just my anxiety) what if I drop my keys down a drain?'

Your thoughts please

Can you get a video monitor? That way always in sight, do you trust neighbour with a key in case lift breaks down? Can you run up21 flights of stairs. The fire breaking out would be my biggest worry too.

Provided I could get up and down the stairs if necessary I'd do it but lots of people will tell you not to.

Objectively it's far less risky to leave your DC securely in your flat rather than take them up and down repeatedly.

I'd also suggest that high rise flat and single mum is going to be less favorably viewed than SAHM wondering 300metres down to the end of the garden to peg the washing on the line.

I'm so 50/50 on it.

If it were outside my front door then I wouldn't be over thinking it at all. But it's the lifts and the what ifs....
I've been trying desperately to move but no one wants my flat :(

I personally wouldn't. Can you get all the kit to the lift, get kids, then all go down together?

Any other mums that could help out in your block?

Depends on exactly what I have to take each time.
For a short weekend at mums, yes I suspect I could relay from door to lift, lift to exit door, exit to car. And just strap the DC in or lock them in the front of car.

But for bigger trips, ie have just booked a week away in June. That would be much harder work. As so much to take.
DS could be strapped into buggy and Dd tasked with taking her own suitcase.
It just seems like the most stressful way and the most likely to forget something way.

Just not sure if I would be remiss in my parenting if I popped down win the bags while they slept.
Really 50/50.

We don't really know our neighbours so I wouldn't be that happy asking one to sit in for even 5 mins cos if the DC woke they would just be confused and scared by the presence of someone they don't know

They'd be even more scared and confused waking up alone

I live on the 2nd floor of an apartment block that has no parking (we park on the road). When the kids were younger I would go out to the car if they were asleep, and our parking is over a road (ie potential for me to get hit by a car!) It sounds like you can park right outside so I think a 3-5 min lift ride is ok. Now mine are older I do it while they are awake!

I would always call the landline on my mobile and have my mobile on speaker so I could hear any movement and dash back, is that an option?

Would on line shopping deliver to your door?

Or lock them in car while you take shopping up first?

Separately, how you contacted any organisations that can help?

Homestart - they could help out 2 hours a week & could be timed with a shop? I volunteer for them & used to take mum shopping as she didn't drive.

The thing that worries me most is the lifts! I would be quite happy popping up and down the stairs with stuff (though appreciate if you're more than a few floors up that may be impossible) BUT would worry about the potential for being stuck in the lift if it broke down.

3/5 mins is fine. If you smoked and went out on your balcolny it would take this time. If you go and hang you washing out in the garden leaving your children asleep in the house it takes that time.

Or lock them in car while you take shopping up first? How is this better?

My worry would be the lift breaking down when I was inside. It can sometimes take a couple of hours to get that fixed and chances are you would have no phone signal inside the lift so you would be unable to call someone to go watch the children.

I turned down a lovely new flat for this exact reason, I had a dog that needed to be let out a few times a day as well and moving there would have meant me bundling baby ds up and down the stairs multiple times a day. It's a tough one.

Or lock them in the car...

I am one foot in the 'same as hanging the washing' camp and one foot in the 'it's too far/takes too long camp'

The loft does scare me as well.
But in reality it's lots of flights of stairs and would add minutes into the time