MIL (well MIL to be) AIBU?

[MrsUniverse]

My MIL is a genuinely nice person and something collapsed in her house while she was away in Spain. My OH found out after 2 days that she'd been living with no water or heating and invited her to stay here. Now it's lucky he was home because he's supposed to be working away but the company have postponed that for a couple of months.

Still, I work from 3pm til 11pm every week day, I'm getting in and cooking for us three/buying extra to make sure the portions are big enough.

AIBU to feel stressed and that I can't relax properly? I'm genuinely struggling because I can't just veg out on the sofa with my computer at the end of work. I don't want to be mean and tell her to leave or anything but I'm not awful for finding it difficult, right?

So, your MIL comes back from a holiday to find her house has fallen to bits. She then has to decamp to her sons house and sleep on the sofa. Not to mention the stress of trying to get it sorted and paid for.

And you're worried you can't veg on the sofa in your bra? You choose not to ask her to help with cooking then complain you are having to do the cooking?

If this was my MIL, I'd welcome her into my house and ask what I could do to help. If she was in the house all day (and there is nothing that suggests this MIL is retired) I'd ask if she could help with things if I'm struggling to find the time.

As a "genuinely nice person". I suspect she isn't happy about all of it either. Sad that in none of your posts have you considered her side in this.

I don't see why you can't just "veg out" at 11pm!

Perhaps not in your bra if MIL still about!

When are they eating?

Couldn't they at least look after themselves during the day if you're OK cooking for yourself at 11pm?

I think people are being harsh. OP has welcomed MIL in and is doing all the right things. She is sympathetic. She's just finding it hard to share a 1 bed place with her DP and her MIL-to-be, and I can't think of many people who wouldn't.

you're doing a good deed, OP. You deserve an online grumble over it if it helps you cope.

Sorry I should have asked are you cooking for them at 11pm, obviously you're feeding yourself

Thanks sleep. I think that's the crux of it. I don't want to be mean and kick anyone out but that doesn't mean it isn't stressful.

I've just spoken to my partner and agreed that they can get food and cook for themselves and I'll sort out my food when I get in.

They were waiting until 11pm to eat??

Or have I misunderstood?

You work until 11pm. They don't. Why are they not feeding themselves at a more normal time? (I'd have chewed my arm off waiting that long to eat.)

What steps are being taken to repair whatever has 'collapsed' in her house?

Like others have said, why are your husband and his mother not making their own dinner at a normal time?

I understand why you are stressed. Hopefully it will be fixed soon. As they're going to be cooking for themselves, get them to make you something too, and then go chill in your room when you get in.