Sorry for long story. This is an edit of a pp, apologies and thanks.
I grew up without knowing my natural father, and believed he never knew of my existence.
I was eventually able to trace him and wrote to him. He agreed to meet me and we had lunch ten times or so, every other month.
My son was aged one at the time and I had decided not to return to work after maternity leave. As a single parent I claimed benefits. This was my first break in employment for 20 years.
My father told me that he had met me as a baby and wondered if I was his. He said that when my letter arrived in the post, his wife revealed she had always known about me. I asked him none of the hard questions I wanted to; I was treading softly.
My acquaintanceship with him ended when he texted me to say that his family did not want to meet me because both of his grown up children were buying houses, and the stamp duty they paid was keeping me "without the inconvenience of getting your arse out of bed in the morning". He told me I was not contributing and to come back to him when I had a job.
I am still in the full time job I got six weeks after my son started school. I enjoy working and my son is happy and thriving. We have strong ties with my family and life is good, but 3 years later I still have this daydream about taking out a double page spread in the Telegraph (which he reads) and asking him whether I have paid enough tax yet. AIBU?