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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be annoyed at this colleague?

50 replies

cjt110 · 17/05/2016 09:24

Sitting happily at my desk. Get called from the kitchen (across the way from my desk) Is this your melon in the cupboard? I reply yes it is. Colleague says well
I think it's past it's best - It's smelling the cupboard out. I said oh, ok. I'll have a look at dinnertime. A minute or two later I decided to go and get some water to take some tablets and walked into the kitchen and colleague is blatantly whispering/muttering to another colleague in the kitchen who looked embarrassed as I walked in. Colleague then said "It is yours in the cupboard isnt it" I opened the cupboard and said I couldnt smell anything. Colleague said they could. I then said well bin it then and chucked it in the bin. I admit I said it in a pissed off manner because I appear to have walked in on colleague bitching. Colleague then stood at the door for a few seconds and I made a comment that I was sure I only bought it Friday.

Im annoyed that colleague appears to have been talking about me to the other colleague. Why be completely apparently silent then ask about something you'be asked me about no more than a minute or so ago.

I really would like to say look, i dont appreciate you bitching about me to another colleague then pretending you haven't said a word at all.

This colleague can blow hot and cold quite easily.

Well prepared to be told IABU.

OP posts:
DaisyAdair · 17/05/2016 10:19

meloncholy Grin

OP, I sympathise. My workplace is the same at the moment, v stressful as we're all being made redundant soon.

Could you help to lighten things by organising a lunch or night out? Take in cakes or something? A smelly melon just isn't worth falling out over.

Original poster
cjt110 · 17/05/2016 10:19

Milk Not saying I don't say negative things. And as I said above, it was a knee jerk response as I'd just come off the phone.

I wish I had the courage/energy to look for a new job. But, it's local, the work is quite easy and it's well paid. So it seems pointless at the same time.

OP posts:
Original poster
cjt110 · 17/05/2016 10:22

Daisy That's a good suggestion but sadly, no-one, except the usual crowd go for drinks/meals out. And with regards to cakes etc, it's a regular thing here so it just gets looked upon as "more cakes?!"

I have a stash of choccy buttons in my drawer. Tempted to give them to said colleague to say sorry.

OP posts:
sharknad0 · 17/05/2016 10:23

Sir, he took my pen!
Sir, he used my mug!
Sir, she said my melon smells!

followed shortly by ........ITSNOTFAIR I didnt' get a promotion, it's discrimination.

MilkTwoSugarsThanks · 17/05/2016 10:24

Oh dear OP. Sad

I guess YABU, but you know that. You do have my sympathy though, it can be tough working in a shitty atmosphere especially if you feel a bit trapped there.

Original poster
cjt110 · 17/05/2016 10:27

I've seen/heard said colleague be shitty with others. She isn't on my team but there are only 24 of us so it's not like our paths never cross. She has been known to say to the team she manages that they are performing wank. She flits between being your friend then flips to manager mode when it suits. She also has bollocked staff before for X, saying they should be doing it then proceeded to do it herself anyway.

She is nice and her manager role is only in the last 12-18m. The atmosphere on her team is crap. Really crap. And it's filtering through us all. And theres not a lot we can do.

OP posts:
sharknad0 · 17/05/2016 10:29

On a serious note, if your work makes you feel down, it's not pointless to just look for something else. You never know what is available, and it might make you appreciate your current job a lot more. When you look back, you often realise how none of this really matters.

Original poster
cjt110 · 17/05/2016 10:36

I think you're right in some ways sharknad0 It's petty and little but annoys you no end when there's not a lot positive going on.

OP posts:
MiddleClassProblem · 17/05/2016 10:39

When were you going to eat a whole melon at work? You must have quite an appetite.
Also waiting until your lunch break to look when it's 10 is annoying. Just say I'll look when I've done this?

WorraLiberty · 17/05/2016 10:44

Im more miffed by the fact she appears to have been speaking about me, in hushed tones, then got caught out.

I would be very surprised if you've never had a quick moan to someone else about another person. In fact you're doing now. The only difference is, you haven't been caught doing it.

Let it go. Moaning about colleagues is what we do best (well them and MILs) Wink

cupidsgame · 17/05/2016 10:47

It can't have smelt that bad, melons have a nice smell imo. The colleague obviously just smelled a normal melon smell. She needs to be a bit more tolerant.

BinRaidingRaccoon · 17/05/2016 10:55

This does sound like an appalling work situation, hope things improve soon.

I feel sorry for the melon though, waiting in the cupboard for its chance to shine, only to be pilloried, blamed and discarded.

Original poster
cjt110 · 17/05/2016 10:57

I was looking forward to having some at lunch. And threw my toys out of the pram it in the bin in protest :(

I honestly couldnt smell anything and I have quite a sensitive sense of smell.

OP posts:
BinRaidingRaccoon · 17/05/2016 11:00

I'd be devastated. Food waste really angers me, and I pity inanimate objects, so I feel your pain.

PalaceResident · 17/05/2016 11:03

I'm often asked "don't you get lonely in an office on your own"? Er, no posts like this remind me how blissful it is.

Not a good enough reason to look forward to returning to work after maternity leave tho'

ParadiseCity · 17/05/2016 11:09

I love melon, I'd have to get it out of the bin.

She is a twat, you can't change that, you can change how you deal with her. You could email the whole office in a melon-tastic sort of way asking if anyone has a problem with your melons feel free to talk to you in future as you are self conscious about your melons being discussed behind your back. But that really depends on what the other people are like that you work with!

Stillunexpected · 17/05/2016 11:10

Why wasn't the melon in the fridge? Why didn't you move it to the fridge instead of the bin? Or put it on your desk until lunchtime?

Original poster
cjt110 · 17/05/2016 11:16

Still because it wouldn't fit. And no doubt if I'd have put it on my desk, I;d have had all kinds of melon jokes aimed at me and also no doubt, stunk the office out with it too.... Hmm

OP posts:
BoatyMcBoat · 17/05/2016 11:18

Melon? Stinking the place out? Wasn't smelling yesterday? Must be just about ripe then. It sounds utterly delicious.

If I walked into a room that was filled with melon smell, I'd be slavering over it. If I knew you well, I might even cheekily ask for a bit at lunch time! Yum.

gandalf456 · 17/05/2016 11:26

How odd! Of course she can wait until lunch for you to remove the melon and of course no one should have chucked it without asking you. They can't have much work going on if a melon is such a source of gossip so that's probably the problem surrounding redundancies . Yanbu

MiddleClassProblem · 17/05/2016 11:31

I thought op chucked it?

gandalf456 · 17/05/2016 11:33

So she did

readytorage · 17/05/2016 13:00

cjt are you the one with the colleague who wanted the whole of a Parisian pharmacy brought back to her?

Dizzydodo · 17/05/2016 13:09

Maybe they weren't talking about you, maybe they were talking about your melon?

gandalf456 · 17/05/2016 14:02

This thread shouldn't be making me laugh but am i the only one who is reading something rude about the whole melons thing?Grin

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