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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to be the only person concerned that the PTA treasurer seems to have gone missing....

583 replies

PTAmissing · 16/05/2016 07:06

With all the PTA money?

She's been treasurer for years, no children at the school anymore.

She usually attends roughly 1 of every 4 meetings. She hasn't been to one for 6 months. She won't answer the phone or the door, doesn't reply to emails or texts. Chair went to her house and she didn't answer the door although it looked like she was in. We have no access to the money or accounts and the school is lending us money to get back off her at some indeterminate time in the future.

We have the school fate soon and she has all the info on stalls etc not to mention the money we need to buy things! She owes one of the parents about £50 for things they bought from their company for the PTA xmas fate.

Nobody else seems concerned! I really got angry about it at the last meeting and said this is ridiculous, we have no idea how much is in the account, we can't get hold of her, we have no working float. Apparently she has family drama at the moment and thats why she's unavailable but she still wants to be treasurer. I raised the possibility that there could be something dodgy going on and got shut down by the chair who said its not possible as there are two signatories on the account (because she couldn't just forge a signature???)

AIBU to think they should be taking this a bit more seriously given there is over £7000 (at the last count) of money that has been donated by the parents fgs, not to just sit in an account that nobody can get into?!

OP posts:
cozietoesie · 26/05/2016 00:06

Who can tell? What's clear, though, is that the situation has to be regularised.

TheMaddHugger · 26/05/2016 01:12

OK Question. They Keep throwing around the she is going through a hard time right now ..

What is this hard time about ?

It may make a huge difference in my thoughts on this matter.

TheMaddHugger · 26/05/2016 01:13

And why isn't there someone to take over /fill in for her??

Bolograph · 26/05/2016 07:10

It may make a huge difference in my thoughts on this matter.

It doesn't matter, really. Either she can do the job of treasurer, or she can't.

Sunnymeg · 26/05/2016 07:51

The committee needs to know why the treasurer won't work with the chair. Did the chair ask to see the accounts when she took over? Did the treasurer react badly to this request? Or is the issue totally unrelated to the PTA? Either way, this needs to be sorted. When I was a PTA treasurer, I'd still send in a report, if I couldn't make the meeting. I remember when there was an issue between two members of the PTA and the Head chose to absent themselves from PTA meetings until it was sorted. The Head may well be thinking the same. The treasurer is being unhelpful and petulant at best. Whether or not they are covering something up or not.

PausingFlatly · 26/05/2016 08:00

"So treasurer disappeared when new chair was appointed?"

It's possible the "issues" were between the treasurer and the previous chair. And not in the way PP mean.

I don't wish to crank up the melodrama, but if OP does go to the police it would just be worth making sure they know about that little piece of timing.

3dogsandacat · 26/05/2016 10:12

When I was a PTA treasurer, I'd still send in a report, if I couldn't make the meeting.

This is what I don't understand.
No matter what's happening in your personal life, even if you can't attend physically, you are surely capable of keeping in contact by phone or a quick email - It keeps people in the loop and stop lots of speculation, such as this. Confused
But to make yourself completely unavailable is strange.

3dogsandacat · 26/05/2016 10:18

I'm guessing the Chair (and the Head) knows a 'real' reason why the Treasurer is unavailable. They know more than they're letting on.
That's why they're telling everybody that the Treasurer has Personal issues.

'Personal Reasons' gets bandied about a lot when people don't/won't divulge the 'real' reasons why a person is either unavailable or has left.

There's more to this. Probably a rift of some sort.

Original poster
PTAmissing · 26/05/2016 10:40

Treasurers mum is very sick and she is taking care of her. Hence why it's been softly softly for so long.

I took a leave from the PTA for a year or so last year (I only came to occasional meetings as I had a new baby). There were rumblings of things that had gone missing which weren't chased up. PTA printer purchased with funds taken home by persons and not returned. DVDs for movie nights missing from the PTA cupboard. Small things but a culture of not looking too hard. That was under the last Chair. I think the treasurer withdrawing has been incremental leading up to this one big absence.

It's a big old mess!

OP posts:
IceBeing · 26/05/2016 10:52

yuck...this makes my local political party group financial issues actually look good by comparison - which I didn't think was possible...

BeYourselfUnlessUCanBeAUnicorn · 26/05/2016 11:10

Sick mum or not, it doesnt prevent her from talking to someone or replying to a message. If she can't cope she should hand the role over. Utterly ridiculous that they have allowed this situation to go on like this. Seems very dodgy to me, why wouldn't she just resign as treasurer if she couldn't commit?

I'd go to the meeting Friday so I could reiterate my point again that the situation is untenable and it needs sorting NOW and you have no faith that the treasurer will turn up to the summer fete and what is the contingency plan for when that inevitably happens and tell them your resignation stands until you see some actual change and improvement (if indeed you even want to go back to it).

2rebecca · 26/05/2016 11:23

If the treasurer has other commitments that mean she can't be an effective treasurer then she resigns. It's an important job on a committee.
The chair should be tackling all this stuff. If she doesn't have time for the job then maybe she shouldn't have taken it on although maybe no-one else wanted it either.

3dogsandacat · 26/05/2016 11:41

Sick mum or not, it doesnt prevent her from talking to someone or replying to a message.

Yes.
I have every sympathy, but
why cut yourself off completely?

Why not resign and let someone else take the reigns?

lifesalongsong · 26/05/2016 12:25

I've done voluntary things in the past and small issues can seem unmanageable if you have a personal crisis to deal with.

If it's true that she has a very sick relative I'd be more inclinde to think that she's just blocked it all out rather than is on the fiddle. In that situation I'd try and find someone who will go to the treasurers house, take all the stuff away from her and make the best job of recreating what she should have been doing and as long as there doesn't appear to be money missing make a fresh start with the new rules that other posters have suggested and hope that the PTA are more on the ball in future and that they get a good chair who won't let things get into such a bad way

TheMaddHugger · 26/05/2016 13:45

Treasurers mum is very sick and she is taking care of her. Hence why it's been softly softly for so long.

I can't speak for the treasurer. I am still getting over complete burnout from Caring for my parents. I burnt out, my sibling, took over their care.

I have no memories of the actual Burnout. Complete blank.
``````````````````````
However it does sound like she hasn't been doing a god job of it in a while. Long before her Mother's illness
OVienna · 26/05/2016 13:54

Sick mum - why wasn't she rushing to hand over the role? I had this with one organisation and did the same. One of the first things I did, not because I am super organised, but relatively speaking the easiest and most obvious thing to chuck. With no kids at the school as well, she has no reason to feel that by stepping away she's letting them down.

OP - definitely more to this. I would stay well away. I can't see how you would be implicated.

Tangfastics · 26/05/2016 14:31

I was going to ask same as crabbyoldbat

Are you a registered charity? Are the PTA members trustees?

cozietoesie · 26/05/2016 14:45

Her 'books' may simply be not good enough to hand over to someone - in her eyes. If everything has been a bit 'approximate' for some time, she could be seeking some sort of breathing space to enable her to rectify the situation. Instead, it just gets worse and worse.

Personally, I wouldn't go to tomorrow evening's meeting but would wait for the (almost inevitable) call to serve again on the committee. And then, I would suggest that you all just start afresh as best you can. That may be the only way to do it - to take any money that's going and draw a line under things, with a new and rigorously applied constitution.

Original poster
PTAmissing · 27/05/2016 11:23

We aren't a registered charity.

I'm going to the meeting today. Had an email from the chair requesting that all members attend if possible as we have an urgent situation to discuss. Presuming that's the treasurer.

I'm going to say my piece and leave.

OP posts:
BitOutOfPractice · 27/05/2016 11:31

I think you're right to go OP. Thank goodness the chair seems to have woken up!

ItsAllGoingToBeFine · 27/05/2016 11:35

I'm going to the meeting today.

As long as you attend as a parent rather than a committee member. And take copious notes, we need a full and detailed account of the meeting

lifesalongsong · 27/05/2016 11:48

I think you should go to if only to make sure that the situation is being properly explained by the chair and that nothing negative is said about you in your absence

NightWanderer · 27/05/2016 11:50

It's a shame the Head can't attend. She really needs to be there.

cozietoesie · 27/05/2016 12:36

It's a bit more than a shame....

Still.

Puzzledandpissedoff · 27/05/2016 12:40

I'm going to say my piece and leave

I hope it turns out well for you, OP - and now you've resigned I agree it' important to make it very clear you're there as a parent rather than a committee member

They'll resist that of course, but it's hard to see how chopping and changing the role you're apparently prepared to play could be helpful, especially at a time when clarity is needed