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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Driving my new car for the first time - DH has the hump with me.

38 replies

Magicpaintbrush · 15/05/2016 12:05

So for a bit of background I used to be a very nervous driver, literally felt sick with fear when I took a refresher course 7 years ago to get me back behind the wheel. It took ages but I gradually got past it, got a little nissan micra and have loved driving her since. So today was my first ever time driving a new car as my old one was getting on a bit. My husband was brilliant in sorting it all out and I can't thank him enough, however I knew it would take me some time to get used to the new car and I thought he did too. So basically my old car wasn't as responsive as the new one by miles, so taking it out for the first time today was a jittery experience for me and felt totally alien. I know I will get used to it over time, but because I was so anxious as I was driving round and I didn't instantly rave about how easy it was to drive - because it didn't feel easy but very weird to me - my husband has got the hump with me. He says he doesn't want to discuss it but I know he is pissed off because I was nervous driving it and noticing the differences between it and my old car. I'm sure I will grow to love it once I've been out in it a bit more but surely he should understand that I need a bit of practise with it before I'm confident? He seems really disappointed in me :-( it isn't helping, put it that way. AIBU?

OP posts:

Original poster

Magicpaintbrush · 15/05/2016 14:01

Thank you all for your words of wisdom, much appreciated. I think his expectations of my first drive were different to mine, most definitely. He has driven it 4 times now so is pretty used to the new car already - hopefully after driving the car a few more times myself I will be too. I suspect that as I get used to it my enthusiasm will grow and everyone will be happy. It's the newness of it that is a bit 'aaarrgghh!' for me at the moment, but it's reassuring to hear that lots of you feel the same with a new car, not just me then.

OP posts:

mw63 · 15/05/2016 14:11

I'm picking up a new car tomorrow and have the same concerns, much bigger and newer model. Hoping I can find someone to come with me.

Sgtmajormummy · 15/05/2016 14:33

You're not the only one Magic.

DH has had a clean licence for almost 40 years and is one of the best drivers I know. He still asked me to come on the first drive (company car) with him, just to speak his thoughts and impressions out loud. He was concerned about going from manual to automatic and I'd done it with a hire car without giving it a thought. Ignorance is bliss, maybe?

We had a lovely drive around the backroads/supermarket carpark yesterday and today really broke it in with a trip to IKEA!
You'll soon get used to your new car, I'm sure.

Original poster

Magicpaintbrush · 15/05/2016 15:36

Just went for a second drive and it felt a bit better this time, we are both a bit happier now. The main thing I'm noticing is how sensitive the accelaration pedal is when starting off from stationary, it feels like it wants to lunge forward with even a featherlight touch, so I need to keep an eye on that (don't want to end up in the bumper of the car infront when I'm pulling off from a roadside parking position), but otherwise better. DH said he thought I did much better the 2nd time, so there you go, practise makes perfect. He no longer has the hump!

OP posts:

misscarlar · 15/05/2016 16:21

I would ignore him. And if you are nervous you can have another lesson my instructor said I could and that she has some people who when they have a new car have a lesson in parking and working our blindspots and things

FindoGask · 15/05/2016 16:31

You'll be grand. I recently borrowed a friend's sporty new Honda civic as my own car, beloved but clapped out, was in the garage. I am a confident driver but the difference was so extreme, like you say- super speedy acceleration and low biting point, plus completely different handling, plus no visibility out of the back. I drove everywhere v. gingerly for the first day or so before I got the hang of it. Then of course I had to get used to my own car again, which felt like a total barge in comparison.

Dowser · 12/07/2016 19:30

Just driven DH car for the first time. I started on a thread asking if anyone else felt like me about a new/ different car...and there's loads of us.
Don't know if it's an older age thing.

I've been driving the same type of car for 16 years so this newer racier one is like a set of hot wheels.

I'm taking it out of town up the dual carriageway tonight as I'm doing a long distance drive at the weekend...but needs must
.
DHs stroke has put paid to him driving.

RaptorInaPorkPieHat · 12/07/2016 19:54

I really hate it when I drive an unfamiliar car, it takes me a while to get used to them (our last new car, we went for a test drive I stalled it twice).

It really helped a few years back when we bought a lemon and it spent most of the first year in and out of the dealers, I had so many different courtesy cars

Snowflakes1122 · 12/07/2016 19:57

When we got our new car, in was like a new driver all over again. It's a weird feeling if your not used to changing cars.
He is being stupid over this and needs to understand it'll take some getting used to.
Enjoy your new car!

FeckinCrutches · 12/07/2016 20:00

I'm sure she'll be fine now. It's a while since she posted!

Topseyt · 12/07/2016 20:41

You sound like me. I don't take naturally to driving, and am a bit nervous.

I like cars I am well used to driving, on roads I know well generally. If I have to drive a different one or go off my patch for whatever reason then I am nervous again and feel a bit like a learner.

I do think that people who do take naturally to driving do not really understand those feelings. I guess they are just wired differently. Perhaps that is your DP.

KateLivesInEngland · 12/07/2016 20:48

I'm a confident driver who has been behind the wheel for over a decade but when we changed our car it still took a fair few outings to get used to the new car! It's totally understandable I felt quite uneasy as all the knobs were different and I had to really look and think where the wipers etc were which is quite disconcerting when you're travelling over 70 on the motorway!! Of course I looked before I set off but your mind goes blank when you're caught in a massive downpour at speed.

Dowser · 12/07/2016 21:54

I've been driving 43 years.

I'm a lot higher up in this car so it feels weird. It's another Toyota , everything us in the same place, thank goodness just I'm higher up.

I wanted him to get a Kia ceed . Think that's what I'll get when I'm due a change.

I either take this car to Cardiff on Saturday or my old one with all the rough grating noises .

Dilemma. Three days to get used to it and make a decision.

What would you do?

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