To think that a shop assistant shouldn't say this to a child?

[pristinechristine]

Out shopping this afternoon with DD(5). In a high street shop, at the till paying, when completely out of nowhere the shop assistant starts saying to DD - "ooh, you look like you want a McDonalds. I can see it in your eyes. You want a McDonalds, don't you?"

I was quite taken aback. There was nothing to pre-empt the comment whatsoever, it was totally random. Fortunately for me DD isn't bothered by McDonalds the way she might be by, say, an ice cream so it didn't cause an issue for us. But this is the sort of thing that could cause real problems for a parent, surely? I said to him (kind of laughing but serious) you can't say that to children, you'll cause tantrums! To which he replied along the lines of "I know, I'm evil hahaha".

I work customer facing and I would never say anything to a child that could be potential ammunition to cause problems. AIBU?

'Haha maybe another day' smile and walk out. Is it really worth thinking about for more than a nanosecond?

It's got nothing to do with having 'brat' children, and everything to do with being weird and rude.

It is just an unnecessary thing to say!

You'd have a whale of time with my kids KitKat The problem here is, it's not a child seeing something, tugging on their
parents' sleeve and then being told No. Mine are used to that, that's normal. It's the introduction of a third party suggesting it that's weird, it kind of raises their hopes/the older suggester is in cahoots with pressurising mum/knows something they don't: I would have just said to the guy: Why? Are you paying?
Little ones don't necessarily "get" the humour and can take things literally. Yes, I would like a McDonalds thank you, Where is I...oh.
Planting seeds.

Mine had this the other day, they didn't want anything sweet but the baker was offering me free stuff (cos I'd found a squash bug
cockroachy thing in the tomato on my plate) Next minute, Dd2 is wanting something sweet. The power of suggestion isn't it?
Both baker and kid were told no, I am happy not to have any bug-infested dessert ta x

I was hoping though OP, it was going to be a shop assistant insulting the customer thread.
Had this gem the other day to my teenager: "Ah it's such a shame you're overweight. You'd be so pretty if you lost a few kilos".
I live in Germany* She thought she was being helpful.

• anyone who wishes to translate: did you mean to be so rude? feel free.

My DS also has asd and "old McDonald's" is his favourite food in the world. He would have taken the idiot literally and thought he was offering him one, and then would have been gutted. I would have had to buy a McDs or write off the rest of the trip. Not at all unreasonable to be annoyed.

And it's not just brats who have tantrums, it's kids with special needs, tired kids, kids who are under the weather, kids going through a rough patch, and just kids generally!

Total non issue.

He made a clumsy attempt to engage the child in pleasantries, which was probably a directive form head office to engage all customers in a cheery manner so they come back and spend more.

If you're that bother the response is smile cheerily and say " They can want all the like, they aren't getting because McDonalds is rubbish and its xxx for tea"

Seriously not worth knotting knickers over. Human beings are fallible creatures and people make mistakes they think are a good idea at the time.

*that bothered

HWBU.

Parents who threaten their children with shop assistants "If you don't stop doing that, the lady will be angry with you and tell you off" are also BVU.

People generally are weird.

very odd, but a 5 year old won't even know what McDonald is, surely!

I think it shows a lack of thought - I worked on a till and made sure I kept my pleasantries (always greet and engage customer in case it's a mystery shopper) as banal as possible - weather/did you find all you needed/any help packing. I'd never suggest a parent should be offering their kids something like sweets/McDonalds as maybe the parents don't like that sort of food or the child has allergies.

Brought home to me the "never assume" thing on an evening shift, when a dad came in at nearly 10 at night for groceries together with a youngish child (3?) in the trolley in pyjamas, and a slightly older one walking. She made a comment about it being late, he said they'd just come back from holiday. She launched into a chatty, "oh right so she's sent you out with the kids then". His reply was "mummy died a little while ago didn't she". I felt like crying and the poor woman on the other till wished the ground could swallow her. I made even more sure that I kept my conversation dull from then on!

DrinkFeckArseGirls "I'm with the OP. I lost the count of how many times waiters/waitresses asked my daughter if she wants an icecream or a cake or juice. I'm perfectly able of reading the menu and ordering what we need."

Gosh, yes.... that reallly annoys me too: it's not the cost (although that could be a factor too) but our family rule was one fizzy drink with a meal out and water thereafter - trying to avoid the children consuming too much sugar and cafeine, although we applied the same rule for the same reason to ourselves.... these days they're grown up and we share a bottle of wine.
I was absolutely gobsmacked the first time a waiter asked the kids directly if they wanted another soda rather than adressing the adult who had placed the original drinks order to enquire whether we would like any more drinks. Bad commercial practice in my opinion as if it annoys the parents they will probably vote with their feet next time they go out for a meal.

i cant see in the op where the comment did actually cause a problem...

so yabu

he sounds like a nice person being friendly

He made a clumsy attempt to engage the child in pleasantries, which was probably a directive form head office to engage all customers in a cheery manner so they come back and spend more.

Yes, I was thinking that too. It would explain most of the cringeworthy conversations in a few shops I can think of. It's often quite obvious whether someone's just making normal chit-chat and someone Starting A Conversation as ordered from above.

very odd, but a 5 year old won't even know what McDonald is, surely!

I think you'll find most do. And much younger than that.

Just say "yes thanks, you can take him for a happy meal as you've offered" and then tell your dc that the bad man refuses to keep his promise.

Genius

I don't get the people here who say "he was just being friendly" - it was pretty clear by his answer that he knew what he was doing.

Reminds me of this petty villain in a novel who spent his days phoning people who had used cars to sell and promise them he'd buy their car ... then never phoned back.

Also, I cannot stand men who tell girls and women what we want. This thing he did seems harmless, but telling people that you know their mind better than they do is abusive.

I'd tell DD "Never trust someone who claims to know what you want even though he hasn't asked and in fact, doesn't know you at all."

I wouldn't be impressed.

My DD especially would take it as ok, as an adult had said it.

This would not result in me giving in to her, but she would probably have a tantrum/beg on a good day and I would have to disappoint her.

YNBU.
How does he know you weren't vegetarian
Or
Eating meat is not against your Religious beliefs.
or. How does he know you had not just told your DC off for acting out, and next second he's getting a McDonald's. That'd be confusing to say the least.
And How does he know you had the money.

Oh, and while you're there I'll have a milkshake and a quarter pounder, halal obviously.

pigs I wasn't making sweeping comments I was talking from experience. If you read my post you'll see id actually had to pull some one up. And my own grandad was a contangous pain sometimes. The jahaha I'm evil reminded me of my very knowledgable grandad

Ok so I was picking up my god daughter from school and It's well known to the parents at the school my god daughter can not eat McDonald's, any beef or gluten. But a gran was picking one of her class mates up. And the conversation was ah what a treat auntie naughts picking you up bet she&'ll treat you to a macdonalds, me erm no K can't have McDonald's, one of the other mams interjecting to the grandma "that was a bit insensitive, I'm sure naught will take you for a nice treat K" granny "oh don't be silly, K you tell naught you want to go to McDonald's" my god daughter then pipes up "can we go to the trampoline centre instead" granny "well that's just brain washing poor kid" so I turn round and go escuse me you don't know K, please don't be so rude" the granny "oh shut up and take her to McDonald's"

nanny you FoD yourself!

Here's another example, me to niece "no you can't have sweets"
Complete and utter stranger who I've never spoken to ever just sees me and niece in the bus to school on a Wednesday. "Oh go on let her"
Me: I'm sorry what, I'm her family and you don't know us
lady: I see you all the time with her on the bus
me: right I've never seen you and I think it's quite rude to interfere.
Lady: oh fuck off stamps out of the shop.

So just as old people make very judge mental and rude statements wether you like it or not

Hwbu and a bit weird as it was so random!

Reminds me of being in a v expensive toy shop that we only ever went in to for a look and my 2.5yo ds2 hopped on one of those ride-on motorbikes. I told him to hop off which he did and smiled at watching shop assistant. She then followed us down the aisle and said 'Maybe Santa will bring you it, hmm? Have you written your letter?' It was November and he talked the whole way home about it. There wasn't a hope of getting a 100 pound piece of plastic and I was really cross and a little pub about it, talk about putting ideas in their heads.

I might have gone back later on my own to complain

NaughtToThreeSadOnions

Yes you've had experience of 'old people' saying things out of turn.

Doesn't mean all old people.

I don't tell random people what treats they should give their children. We're not all like your grandad.

No but then neither are all young people rude or need to be told to oh do fuck off dear nanny

In fact you've actually by your do fuck off dear you've just cermented my opinion that older people are rude and self righteous so well done!

And oh by the way the people that do travel with my niece and I every day and actually bother to talk to us rather than sticking their bloody noise in and judging wether my 6 year old niece can have sweets and wether I'm in any position to judge this for myself. Are amazing, my niece had a lovely conversation with one of them about the school Fayre on the bus this morning.

I actually loved my grandad, my mam not so much when he wound us up by deliberately going against her wishes,