Why do parents allow children to bring own toys to toddler group?

[NeedACleverNN]

I'm not talking about comfort toys but ones that they have just brought with them.

I love going to toddler groups because it encourages children to share and it gives me a chance to watch my dc interact with others.

However occasionally you get one child who brings in this shiny new toy and ww3 erupts.

The child whose toy belongs to get upset because all the children are crowding them and the other children are getting upset because they want to play with a toy that they can't. Trying to explain that all the toys in the hall are for you to play with except that one is difficult because they don't understand.

AIBU to think that own toys should be left at home?

We all just try and get through the day, bound to be clashes where people have different routines, ideas about things, children with different needs etc but world doesn't revolve around one correct style of parenting. Tbf I used to get pissed off about all sorts when my precious dc went to toddler groups, seems to go with the territory ;)

Maybe parents shouldn't rush to stop their toddlers trying to grab the favourite toy from the toddler! Maybe he/she will learn it's not worth taking! The more I think about it the more I think you're right OP. Leave own toys at home and no hassle all round!

I used to let mine take a toy from home but I'd let the other children play with it. If my DC kicked off I'd put it in the buggy until home time.
Other parents did the same as me.
Although one Mum did stand on her chair and demand everyone search for her DC's minuscule Minnie Mouse figure.

Yanbu

Sometimes it's just easier.

Sometimes you make a mistake. For some reason you are not allowed to make small mistakes when you're a mother. Instead you are labelled as the kind of parent who lets their kid take a toy to playgroup or the kind of mother whose kids never have a sunhat.

I actually think you are right though op. Is a bit hard to have one rule for most of the toys but special rules for a few "own," toys.

My dd is grown up. What I remember about toddler group is how filthy and disgusting the toys were, and how the babies were abandoned by their mothers to fend for themselves while the mothers chatted. If the groups are anything like that today, I'm not surprised children want to take their own toys.

Having taken my turn at nursery when ds's were small and now a cm I have seen this all to often.

Apart from all the hassle it causes in nursery there is the mad searching at home time to make sure little X has all the toys they brought with them that day (and I have seen kids arrive with 4-5 toys with them) And if you are picking up from nursery it takes staff and myself time to make sure they have all their toys, cram them into their bags and get out the door. And if they cant find one....all hell breaks loose.

One of our local nurseries has a no toys from home policy unless its a comforter and just for settling in period. If you get 15 kids all with their own toys its a nightmare to get them to share, not to try to 'have a go' of someone elses toys, findinh 'lost toys' and to get them to put down their own toys and do the activity they are supposed to be doing. Playgroups and nurseries have plenty toys and activities to do, they dont need more toys that only one child is allowed to play with (cos its "mine")

Parents on the whole only see part of the picture, they let little johnny take their toy to nursery cos its easier for them, but if all the kids brought toys its no joke for the staff. I know one nursery that had to point this out to a mum as their kid regulalry took about 7 toys to nursery, all shapes and sizes and was very precious about them, nobody else was allowed to touch them etc. It upsets and disrupts the whole setting sometimes.

Because the child has had a massive strop about leaving the house without that particular toy, on that particular day.

My ds had never had a comforter or attachment toy but he does like to take a small car or plastic animal or dinosaur from home almost every time we go out. I see it as his version of a comforter.
I don't see the issue. He carries it around a bit and when he loses interest I pick it up and put it in our bag.
At nursery there's a box for "home toys" by the door that they put them in when they're ready to let go.
I've never seen another child cry for not being able to have one of my ds's toys.

[obv a bike is different but some kids scoot to nursery]

I think YABU but I've never come across this issue.

YANBU. My DD often wants to bring her own toys. I just tell her that if she does she has to share it with the other children. She soon changes her mind.

You said how going to toddler group "encourages children to share"

Well...it also teaches them about "belongings" and how not everything is for them.

That said, I never let mine take their stuff to toddler group because there's always a few children who can't take no for an answer for various reasons.

My ds nearly always has a toy with him but we have an agreement that the toy goes away in my bag when we get to wherever were going. Now he's older I ask him if he wants to share the toy or leave it in the car, he always choses to leave it in the car!

Similar conversation re nursery! My son is told he can take the toy in the car but not into nursery as there are plenty of toys there!