Wedding and Zika risk...AIBU?

[baffledmummy]

One of my closest friends lives in Southern California and recently got engaged. I’m so happy for her. DH, DD and I are all invited to the wedding which is in early October. It is a relatively small wedding (I think around 40 people) and I would love nothing more than for us to go over and celebrate with my friend. The only thing that is worrying me is the potential (likely?) spread of the Zika virus this summer.

DH and I are planning to start TTC in late summer – for various reasons I don’t want to postpone (work and family related reasons and also the fact I’ll be 40 so have no idea how long it might take). There are already travel advisories in place for pregnant women travelling to Mexico which is an ‘active transmission’ area – that is only 100 miles south of where the wedding will be and they are only just coming in to mosquito season in California so I can’t see how it wont spread.

How do I handle this? I feel I can’t risk it, but at the same time, I’m gutted I wont be able to go to the wedding and I think my friend will also be really upset. We only see each other once every couple of years as it is (ee used to live together for years and are really close). I also know she is really excited about ttc as soon as they can after the wedding and so I feel awful telling her I can’t come because I don’t want to risk my as yet unconceived baby’s health when she is excited about trying for her own baby.

So…AIBU for not going to her wedding and telling her the reason why? If so, what would you do? I feel awful!

there are an awful lot of ifs, buts and maybes here as you know. you aren't pregnant and there isn't any Zika there at the moment. however you are right to be cautious. if I were you I would book to go but make sure you have good travel insurance in place and that you keep a close eye on the advice from the communicable diseases people. If zika is confirmed in California then if you book through someone reputable rather than make up your own package and you are pregnant then you should get a refund. being brutally honest if you don't get pregnant soon and you have already decided not to go then you would be really kicking yourself about missing out.

www.latimes.com/local/lanow/la-me-ln-low-zika-risk-in-california-20160316-story.html

Risk is very very low, you should go to the wedding. Yabu.

Go! But take some hard core insecr repellant for your skin, keep exposed skin to a minimum, wear long sleeves and trousers, and take a mosquito net for the bed

Get lots of DEET and don't get bitten.

Ah ok...maybe I'm over-reacting. Some good tips there - thanks!

It took me and OH a long time to get pregnant. In the end we stopped making decisions based on the "what if we got pregnant" idea because it can eventually do things with your head. Imagine leaving it too late or not going, then not being pregnant that month? Two blows that may be hard to take. I would go, but take other's advice on travel insurance and have plenty of DEET.