American family moving to London with 3 little kids...

[Arty3542]

Hello all!

I have no idea where to post this... My husband and I might relocate to London at the beginning of next year. He has a job opportunity in Covent Garden. Our kids are 6, 4 and 2 years old. We will be moving from the NYC area. We are very excited but I'm very nervous at the same time. I'm so worried about being isolated and lonely.

Which area is best for American Expats? Do we try for a church/Christian school? Do we attempt to apply to the American School? I heard this is very hard to get into. Will we be in for a culture shock? Do you think it will be easy to make friends with people? Only asking because a couple people told me it's very hard to make friends, the British keep to their own. I didn't know what to say to that and thought it was a bit silly.

AIBU? ;)

Thank you in advance!

Hey there. Fellow american and spent about 12 years in London before moving out to the south west coast. I think schools will be the least of your worries especially if you already lived in a city the same applies (picking an area, what sort of school you are after etc). Bouncing children between the US and UK I found that I prefer Uk schools. Less hassle as its a school uniform, more diverse, and much better community feel (afterschool clubs and playgroups).

There are really American friendly places like guildford if you are pretty full on American and need the company of other americans. I mean that in a nice way but I think it will be a bigger adjustment for you than your children if you suffer homesickness.

Hi OP. Fellow American. As has been noted, the American School (my husband's alma matter) costs nearly twice as much as other private schools - I gather that's not an issue as your husband's employer will be paying?

Having previously been a school that Americans could slot in and out of easily, it's now incredibly competitive and you have no assurance of getting in.

Fulham is great (I live here!) - your budget is generous, check out the Lion streets and Parsons Green.

Also check out the lower Alphabet streets - like a beautiful leafy American suburb in the middle of London.

Re homesickness - I moved from Melbourne, Australia, to London when I was 22. The first 6 months I was quite homesick, but the breaking in factor was also exciting. At times I yearned for the familiar beauty of my city (and I was a real city girl, having lived on the Southbank in Melbourne) and the glorious weather which you don't really get here (but you sure do appreciate when it arrives for about 6-8 weeks of the year).

After a couple of years it completely eased and I didn't feel the need to ever live in Melbourne again - it was a case of if it happens, it happens. So I married a Brit and I'm still here nearly 20 years later. Though no longer in London - I'm a home counties person now with 2 kids with British accents who say "after you - no, after you I insist!" when they get stuck in a doorway together

I still pinch myself sometimes...

I'm a home counties person now with 2 kids with British accents who say "after you - no, after you I insist!" when they get stuck in a doorway together

You shouldn't underestimate how acutely the weather might affect you. It can be hideously depressing, particularly in January through April. Extra bad with young children.

I didn't notice a bout of homesickness. In my opinion, it's because I didn't compare UK v US all the time. I just waded in and enjoyed everything.

One of the problems I had moving here was that costs were quite oppressive in my opinion, so it was hard not to compare.

I really love living in the UK and especially London, but certain things definitely make me grind my teeth. There are definitely hugely maddeningly parts of living here: primarily the cost, some cultural, some a product of the times, and some that just seem like accidents of history. That of course will hopefully be balanced by the good things (in our case it is). Coming from NYC, you will probably be less wowed by the big city amenities that London has, but there are a huge number of other opportunities here that you won't get there.

Whether your move is permanent or temporary, it will be a great experience.

I agree chilli, I was astounded by the cost when I moved here - I thought that living in NYC had permanently insulated me from sticker shock . The compromises one must make on housing are unholy.

The compromises one must make on housing are unholy.

Yes! The cost is bad enough, but do they have to charge extra for mould?

To be fair, that's the only cost I find outrageous here (I was not coming from NYC, so it was a much bigger jump for me).

Unfortunately, housing is the biggest outlay.

Clothes - much more expensive here. Hopefully the OP has a nice sister to send her quarterly shipments like I do.

we haven't found that about clothes, but I think we are unusual in that none of us are really interested in fancy clothes.

One thing I love about here are school uniforms.

I guess that depends on what you mean by 'fancy'. Many major brands will be (at best) about half the cost in the US. I pay pretty close attention to the Gap and J.Crew, in the case of the latter it's about a third of the cost in the US.

OP do yourself a favour and take advantage of the one-time VAT exemption you'll get on your shipping container and buy everything you think you'll need for your house now. There is nothing even remotely comparable to say, Crate and Barrel or Pottery Barn here.

Although, as I think a pp said, UK houses tend to be smaller. If you're looking at properties on Rightmove (which is an enjoyable pastime in its own right) take note of the size of the rooms, and see how they're currently furnished, to get an idea of what you can expect to fit in. No point in buying new stuff you won't have room for.

I've worked beside Aldgate Station and it's very accessible. The metropolitan line starts/ends there so with a change at Baker Street from the Jubillee line Maida Vale, St John's Wood is perfectly accessible. Might be 30 mins on the tube plus the walk from home to the station but very bearable. If the office relocates to the West End [wouldn't bank on it, it's the most expensive office space in the world] then the commute time is broadly similar with probably a bit more hoping on and off.

This is over budget by quite some way but it has been on the market for a year now so I suspect that they are open to negotiation for a longer lease. It's here mostly to illustrate what you can get for your money in South East London as an earlier poster mentioned leafy Blackheath and Greenwich, which border [ish] Dulwich. Both are closer to the City [Aldgate] and Canary Wharf. It's 20 mins on the train to Charing Cross, 5 min walk to Covent Garden [though I recognise that's changed now] The tube network doesn't really go into South London.
There are plenty of private prep schools but top private second level schools are mostly in Dulwich. Highly competitive to get into though.
www.rightmove.co.uk/property-to-rent/property-53168327.html

The other key factor to consider is whether your husband will need to travel frequently for work. Proximity to an airport is handy if that's a factor which means Heathrow [global access] or London City [European]. Heathrow is a total pain from SE London but London City is on the doorstep. If Heathrow is needed frequently, then I'd stay in the Maida Vale / St John's Wood / Regents Park areas with your budget. Watch out for yellow roads on the maps - there are lots of nice properties but many on main traffic arteries.
www.rightmove.co.uk/property-to-rent/property-41056572.html

oh yes, talking to someone you don't know will almost get you arrested south of Watford!

further north it is rude NOT to chat to the person next to you on the bus.

Come to the south east op! Dulwich, forest hill, etc. It's lovely round here! School are fab, loads of families and parks, easy commute into town and accessible for loads of places. Brighton for the beach isn't far either.

Welcome!

My advice would be not to broadcast it's a (long term) temporary move. London is cry transient and the "locals" are less inclusive if they think you're not around for a long time.

Re friendliness, my manager is an American who used to live and work in NYC but now splits her time between Europe and London. She's been really impressed with how friendly and helpful Londoners have been - she mentions it every time I see her. I wouldn't worry too much about that - I think, as Londoners, our reputation has gone a bit mad and everyone is pleasantly surprised that we're a nice bunch.

For clothing, I reckon on the price being the same in pounds and dollars, which of course means that they are substantially more expensive in the UK. Same with IT - if you need new tablets or laptops, OP, get them before you come over but check that the tablets are compatible with UK networks if you want to have 3G access (this is not difficult - I got my own iPad which has 3G in Boston - you just need a model that isn't linked to a US network).

Don't forget to bring ski gear as the Alps are only a 2 hour flight away. The entire British middle class goes ski-ing for a week in winter which accounts for all the people you see in knee braces in early spring.

How about Kennington? Walkable to Covent Garden, and to everywhere central for you, parks etc.

Do plan to buy new clothes back in NYC! Most other things are now available here and not too stupidly expensive - it's not like 25 years ago when we'd visit family every Easter in the US and return with an extra holdall full of pecans, maple syrup, Betty Crocker cake mixes, M&Ms and Peeps, as well as towels, saucepans, and anything else you can think of!

Wow! Again, all wonderful information!! My husband will be speaking with the higher-ups soon and then will meet with his future boss, who will actually be coming here. :)

TreadSoftly, I really like the Regent's Park home. Very much our style! It's beautiful. Thank you!

From talking to our British friends, the American Schools are a little behind the UK, mostly in Math. I'm wondering if it'll be really really difficult to try for an independent or prep school?? The American School seems like a long shot.

We don't live close to any of our family member here. Closest ones are about 2 hrs away. Maybe this will make the transition a bit easier?

We will probably have to rent out our home. Kind of daunting too.

If we do visit over the summer, I will be sure to try and make a MumsNet event!! How fun!!

I will take note of what to say and what not to say. :)

Shinynew, that made me LOL.

Oh, do people tend to move over the 6 week summer break? Not sure if we necessarily have to finish the school year here. Do you think moving after Christmas will be tough and then settling the kids in school before the new school year(Fall 2017)? Talking about Winter/Spring of 2017...

The new school year starts in September here after most of July/ August off, so that's when most would try and move before I think. But people obviously move in and out all year so it's not really an issue starting school any time. Just means playing catch up a bit school work wise maybe

You can look online to see what should be the average expected of each age. They have syllabus of key stage 1 ( reception, year 1, year 2), then key stage 2-3-4, roughly every 3 years of schooling.

If you moved in the Winter next year, your children would be 7, 5 and 3? The first two would need to join a school when you arrived, I think, unless you registered to homeschool them. Joining in the middle of the school year might be tougher because friendship groups will already be established and finding a place could be more difficult. I think that's why most people move in the Summer break, so they have an even chance of getting the schools they want and the children all start together.