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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not care

39 replies

appleglitter · 30/04/2016 17:23

Dp has said I can pick my own engagement ring, we will go together in a couple of weeks to chose one that I like. We don't do romance and to be honest if he did the whole big romantic proposal I would find it really awkward and so would he. I told my friend I was excited about going with dp to pick out my engagement ring in a few weeks and she said that she couldn't believe that he's not picking it himself and kept going on about how I wouldn't have a good story to tell people. I told her that really don't care about that and to me it's not about all that at all, though I am looking forward to getting a lovely ring Grin aibu to not be that bothered about the whole big proposal?

OP posts:
Original poster
appleglitter · 30/04/2016 18:01

That's what I thought!

OP posts:
Fluffycloudland77 · 30/04/2016 18:01

We chose mine together. I picked one he wouldn't have chosen.

Original poster
appleglitter · 30/04/2016 18:03

I've had a nosey online to get an idea of what I like and I know he wouldn't chose the ones I've liked so far.

OP posts:
Only1scoop · 30/04/2016 18:05

Yanbu

Why do you have to have a 'story'

How naff

Original poster
appleglitter · 30/04/2016 18:09

I know, we're really not overly romantic so I don't think anyone would ask us about our story anyway haha.
She's very much Prince Charming fairytale kind of person. That is the opposite to me.

OP posts:
Creatureofthenight · 30/04/2016 18:18

We chose mine together, we went to a different city to get it and made a day of it, and it was a lovely day.

MatildaTheCat · 30/04/2016 18:24

We also chose together. Dh wouldn't have had a clue and frankly neither did I. It was only after trying several styles on that I worked out what suited me and what I liked best.

It was romantic though, a naice jeweller in a naice place. It's not very flashy, we had very little spare cash at the time. I still love it 27 years on.

On the other hand, my friend's fiancé chose and bought the flash Tiffany ring and proposed on Christmas Eve underneath the tree, so very romantic. Unfortunately she didn't really like the ring and it cut into her finger so she had to take it back and exchange it which was, ahem, less romantic. Grin

scarednoob · 30/04/2016 18:34

My colleague was about to propose to his gf (now wife!) and he asked the girls over lunch whether we would want the ring to be produced at the proposal or to choose it together. 50% said if he hadn't bothered to buy it first they would say no, and 50% said they would absolutely want to be there.

He said, "oh thanks very much, really helpful!!"Grin

I don't think it matters if he says "let's get hitched as we're stuck with each other" at mcdonalds or if he spells "will you marry me" in rainbow coloured diamonds, so long as you want to be together!

Gide · 30/04/2016 19:03

I chose mine on a trip out with the DP. Given the appalling clothes he points out-stuff that my gran wouldn't wear-I'm glad we chose it together :) It would be such a shame if your DP gave you something you didn't like.

19lottie82 · 30/04/2016 19:18

I always wonder abou people who do a suprise proposal with a suprise ring...... How do they get the sizing right? It's really not something you can guess!

OP, I chose my own ring, as others have said I you're going. To be wearing it for the rest of your life , so you want something that you really love!

useyourimagination · 30/04/2016 19:22

DH has never bought me any jewellery without running it past me first, including my engagement ring. Mind you, he'd have had a job to surprise me with one seeing as I proposed to him.

Only1scoop · 30/04/2016 19:32

Op

You sound like me

Original poster
appleglitter · 30/04/2016 19:37

I'm actually really excited about it now Smile

OP posts:
JaceLancs · 30/04/2016 21:02

I've been engaged 3 times but only married the once not sure what that says!
Each time has been different but have always chosen ring together
Since my divorce I decided I did not wish to marry again DP wanted to 'do' something so we chose a ring to symbolise our commitment - as I prefer second hand jewellery and wanted something quite expensive I traded in something else and he paid the difference I still love it years later and get so much pleasure from wearing it

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