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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To demand people keep their dogs away from me on the seafront

999 replies

TigerPath · 29/04/2016 07:16

I'm sick of random dogs coming up to sniff me and DS or getting under my feet. All dogs make me nervous even small ones. And I hate it when they cock their leg on my pram wheels Angry

So now when a dog comes up to me or just before it reaches me I shout to the owner (politely but firmly) 'please keep your dog away from me/my pram'
Most oblige but a number are rude! Yesterday a woman retorted crossly 'but it's the sea-front'. I replied 'they should be on leads' and got a mouthful of abuse. There is a bloody great sign saying 'dogs should be on leads on the promenade'!! I wouldn't care if people kept them to heel but I don't want them touching me, my pram or tripping me up Angry

AIBU??

OP posts:
Thread gallery
12
FarrowandBallAche · 02/05/2016 11:58

Of course Need! You would love my dogs I'm sure.

Fenella you're mind kind of gal. Dog tears and gin. Perfect Smile

WaitrosePigeon · 02/05/2016 12:09

Poverty, I can bring my Yorkshire too. He's not very scary tho. He only has 4 teeth left!

WaitrosePigeon · 02/05/2016 12:11

Look at this scary beast!!

To demand people keep their dogs away from me on the seafront
SoleBizzz · 02/05/2016 12:32

My dog Fluffy wants to meet your dog Waitrose

To demand people keep their dogs away from me on the seafront
WaitrosePigeon · 02/05/2016 12:34

Fluffy looks happy today!!

SoleBizzz · 02/05/2016 12:37

He is. He looking for breakfast.

FarrowandBallAche · 02/05/2016 12:41

Hers one of mine watching the horses.

To demand people keep their dogs away from me on the seafront
mrsfisher11 · 02/05/2016 12:49

I don't think that you are being unreasonable to say it, if the dog is bothering you and certainly if they are peeing on your pram. However, I am a small dog owner and he gets very excited when he sees people on walks, he's only a pup. As a responsible dog owner I am training him to ignore strangers, therefore if my dog hasn't done anything I would be a bit annoyed if you started shouting from afar for me to keep my dog away.

Rosebud05 · 02/05/2016 12:54

OP says she calls out when the dog is approaching her, not from afar.

JeanGenie23 · 02/05/2016 12:57

This was my old dog taken last year. He couldn't get his back legs up on the chair so just gave up and hung there hahaha

He was a Plummer terrier and was 18years old when he sadly died this year. I do miss him!

To demand people keep their dogs away from me on the seafront
FarrowandBallAche · 02/05/2016 13:00

What a fabulous little guy Jean!

JeanGenie23 · 02/05/2016 13:12

Thank you farrow Smile just two cats and a child to contend with now Grin

InDogWeTrust · 02/05/2016 13:21

Dog owner/trainer here and Yanbu.

merrymouse · 02/05/2016 14:09

Some people on this thread are deliberately missing the point.

If your dog is under control and not going where it isn't wanted, nobody cares. However, I wouldn't assume that a person (or dog) would want to be sniffed by me, so why would I assume that they want to be sniffed by my dog?

Dogs should no more approach push chairs than toddlers should approach dogs. Both toddlers and dogs may need to be physically restrained when they are out in public. An off lead dog should have immediate recall and have been called back to the owner before reaching a random stranger. This demonstrates that you are paying attention to your dog and that it is under control.

If you aren't prepared to do this you are going to annoy other dog walkers as much as any one else.

This really isn't about dog owners being persecuted by dog haters, although it might be easier to pretend that than take proper responsibility for a dog.

Lighteningirll · 02/05/2016 14:31

I thijk it's pretty clear that the OP has an unreasonable fear and loathing of dogs and yells her demands at owners, the vast majority of whom are happily going about their business as are the rest of the seafront population BUT if she really has vast swathes of huge aggressive dogs peeing on her prams and terrifying her dc whilst off lead in an on lead area she would have my sympathy.

SukeyTakeItOffAgain · 02/05/2016 14:43

Some people on this thread are deliberately missing the point

Reeeeeeeally? On AIBU?? Good Lord!

Ladyleia · 02/05/2016 15:02

Shining I've been thinking about your posts and how your runs can become uncomfortable when you spot a dog, and how you are scanning for dogs when you are out running. The only thing I can think of that enables this situation to keep happening to you is that once you have spotted a dog, you are wary and you are interacting with it. What I mean by that is that you are watching it, possibly looking directly at the dog which it might see as aggressive behaviour from you.

I am not for one moment saying that the owner of the dog should not have their dog under control but I wanted to make the point that if you are warily watching the dog and trying to anticipate it's behaviour, the dog is now in a relationship with you. It knows and can sense you looking, it can smell your physical response (maybe flight or flight kicks in). The dog is now aware that you are in relationship with it and now it wants to know who you are. I would suggest that the best thing you can do is completely ignore the dog, definitely don't look at it and give it no thought whatsoever and it will carry on sniffing for squirrels and you won't be bothered by it.

Original poster
TigerPath · 02/05/2016 15:05

This really isn't about dog owners being persecuted by dog haters, although it might be easier to pretend that than take proper responsibility for a dog

This exactly. I don't hate dogs. I don't even have a phobia of them and I used to enjoy walking my friend's old Boarder Collie, years ago.

It's not just about aggressive dogs, but dogs who come up and bother people. Even a small dog can be annoying if it's under your feet or scrabbling at your legs.

It's about owners TAKING RESPONSIBILITY. Not letting your dog approach people and prams (even for a sniff), keeping dog on a lead in public, and calling it to heel if it's off-lead and people need to pass you. Not letting your dog charge towards people who may be fearful of it.

Owners of big powerful dogs need to realise their dogs LOOK intimidating. It isn't an irrational fear that people 'need to get over'. Dogs have the ability to kill and maul and it's impossible to tell whether the dog running towards you is gentle or vicious.

IMO it all boils down to being considerate. Either you let your dog frighten and upset people, justifying it because the dog 'likes to run free' or you are considerate of others and keep him under close control.

OP posts:
merrymouse · 02/05/2016 15:13

it's pretty clear that the OP has an unreasonable fear and loathing of dogs and yells her demands at owners

No, it isn't. It's clear that she doesn't like being approached by strange dogs. Whatever the reason, that is perfectly reasonable.

As it isn't unusual for dog owners to let their dogs off lead despite them having questionable recall, it seems odd to assume that she isn't being approached by strange dogs.

The only conclusion can be that some dog owners find it easier to have their dogs off lead despite their training/temperament indicating that they need to be on lead. They don't like being picked up on this.

kali110 · 02/05/2016 15:13

Ffs no op, rephrase that " to some people they look intimidating"
If you are not scared of dogs or dislike them, then it really is not coming across that way! Grin

merrymouse · 02/05/2016 15:18

Dogs have the ability to kill and maul and it's impossible to tell whether the dog running towards you is gentle or vicious.

But it's quite easy to show that you have noticed what your dog is doing And that it is under control by calling it back and demonstrating that it will respond to your commands...unless of course you can't call it back and you aren't really in control.

You shouldn't assume that any person or animal will be happy to see a dog bounding towards them.

merrymouse · 02/05/2016 15:19

kali, assume that other people and animals find your dog intimidating until there is a clear reason to believe otherwise.

Shining15 · 02/05/2016 15:33

some dog owners think 'dogs allowed off lead' = 'dogs have the right of way and can do whatever they want'
part of the problem is that I run and cycle in partly in area's where dogs are allowed off lead, dog owners clearly think this means I just have to put up with whatever their dog feels like doing, ie trying to trip me up, jumping up at me running after me and leaping after me whilst barking, although the latter seems to occur only when I am on a bike.

I am not the only one who has reported regular dog harassment on this thread

CantWaitForWarmWeather · 02/05/2016 15:37

Do dog owners actually know that not everyone thinks their dog is adorable and not everyone sees their dog in the way that they do? I get that that they feel an intense love for their dog and that they think their dog is beautiful/funny/clever/adorable and in some cases the best thing in the whole world. But not everyone is going to share the same warm thoughts about their dog.

merrymouse · 02/05/2016 15:40

I wouldn't say I get harassed by dogs when I run, but I am certainly sometimes joined by dogs. The vast majority of dog owners call their dog back into their control when they see me. (Obviously some dogs couldn't care less if they were next to the London Marathon and are paying me no attention whatsoever).

However sometimes I have to double back and return the dog to its owner who hasn't noticed that they no longer have a dog.

Its not a simple case of dogs not biting runners. Polite and responsible owners show that they are in control even when their dog is perfectly friendly and just likes runners.