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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Would you ask?

16 replies

hobybabo · 25/04/2016 19:47

I have a... Well a sort of friend. She's a photographer and she did some photos for me last year, we got on really well and she did me a really nice surprise with the photos. We've exchanged a few Facebook pleasantries since then, and she's mentioned that her personal Facebook (which I'm on) is only for actual friends. I'm a bit socially stunted and don't really have friends so just thought I'd give that info there,in case anyone wants to tell me if IABU to think of her as a friend?

Anyway, I'm currently a SAHM but am hoping to get back into work in the next couple of years as my youngest child gets older. My work history is not great, I've not really stuck at anything for a long time and started my family at 18 so there's quite a few gaps. It's also going to be very hard to find work around my husband's shifts, and as he is a low earner and I will be as well we wouldn't be able to afford childcare so I need something where I can be quite flexible.

I was thinking of asking this lady if she wanted any help with the admin for her business, unpaid of course, just to get some experience on my CV. Then when the time comes for me to be looking for paid employment I will have some background and a referee etc.

Does that sound OK? I don't want her to think I'm implying she needs help, she does a very good job of everything by herself! I'm tying myself in knots worrying about asking but I can't quite write it off completely.

OP posts:
flanjabelle · 25/04/2016 19:48

Nothing ventured nothing gained op. Go for it.

PPie10 · 25/04/2016 19:51

I don't know really. Do you have any idea if her business is large/ busy enough that she might require someone to do some admin for her? I think it might be a bit odd tbh.

Ihangmyknickersontheline · 25/04/2016 19:58

How about arranging a night out or just a few drinks and a good catch up then broach the subject then..kind of indirectly if you know what I mean?

rosyleigh · 25/04/2016 19:59

As a sole trader for a small business, I'd find it a bit strange. I don't need someone to help with administration - that's part of my job. I'm a sole trader and like it that way. Even though you offer unpaid work, she might feel indebted to you in someway and it may feel awkward. I'd find it a bit weird tbh. Why not ask at a charity shop/HQ and see if they need help with administration instead?

pippistrelle · 25/04/2016 19:59

I think it sounds like a great idea.

PPie10 · 25/04/2016 20:01

Agree with rosy. You could sort of try to find out if she actually does need someone. Were you assuming that because she has a business she must need an admin person?
If you aren't close enough friends to know this then it would be weird to just randomly suggest this.

PPie10 · 25/04/2016 20:01

Agree with rosy. You could sort of try to find out if she actually does need someone. Were you assuming that because she has a business she must need an admin person?
If you aren't close enough friends to know this then it would be weird to just randomly suggest this.

Gabilan · 25/04/2016 20:03

You could tell her you're looking for voluntary work to improve your CV and ask if she knows of anything. That makes it less personal/ potentially weird. She might know of something if she's not interested herself.

podly · 25/04/2016 20:04

I'm a photographer op and I wouldn't feel offended or anything if you asked. I may struggle to give you anything to do however as there's not much admin. I would definitely ask though, but just explain why you want to do it (cv gaps etc) are you any good on any of the Internet stuff, SEO (search engine optimisation) or anything like that? I'd love it if someone helped me out in those sorts of areas as its a big part of business these days.

I'd say go for it. Worst that can happen is she says no.

Optimist1 · 25/04/2016 20:06

As Gabilan suggests - it'd be better to ask if she knows of anyone that might need the sort of admin support you're offering than to focus your request on her/her business. Good luck!

ChicRock · 25/04/2016 20:07

Don't mix business and pleasure/friendship. This is a bad idea.

DurhamDurham · 25/04/2016 20:08

I work for a local charity and we often have volunteers, they tend to be people who either want to 'give a bit back' to their local community or need to brush up their skills and gain experience so they have some useful things to put on their cv.
Could you consider doing something like that?

hobybabo · 25/04/2016 20:10

Oops! Sorry I missed out a fairly major point in my OP because I was too busy rambling - she's not well at the moment and has posted that business stuff, mainly admin, has to take a back seat for a while whilst she recovers, that's why I thought I'd ask! Certainly not assuming anything, as I said she does a great job on her own, I'm very impressed with her professionalism. She hasn't outright asked for help but I thought maybe she might appreciate it...? I honestly don't know, I'm useless at this sort of thing so I appreciate all your views!

OP posts:
Gabilan · 25/04/2016 20:14

In that case, just ask her OP. Explain why you're happy to volunteer and say you'll understand if she says no.

rosyleigh · 25/04/2016 20:15

Or on a similar vein to what optimist and gabilan suggest, how about a Facebook post explaining what you are looking for and can anyone need any help or suggest someone who does? That way she'll see it and she can approach you if need be, avoiding any awkwardness.
Agree with Podly that if you have knowledge of SEO and Web design you'd be a Godsend to many small businesses. If you do already then fantastic, but maybe think about a beginner course. This certainly would open up alot more opportunities for you. Good luck OP.

rosyleigh · 25/04/2016 20:18

Cross posted OP. In that case it sounds like she could do with a hand and I think it's really thoughtful and kind of you to offer. I'm sure she'd appreciate it. Go for it! Good luck.

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