About my friend copying me

[marylinmonroeroe]

I lost my mum to cancer 3 years ago and have been wanting to have a small tattoo for a while now - something really personal and in memory of her. I've finally arranged it and have told my 2 closest friends.

One of them sent me a message last night asking when I'm having my tattoo because she wants to come with me and have one done herself. I asked what she was having and she said she's been looking at 'symbols and stuff' on instagram but hasn't decided yet.

AIBU to be a bit pissed off that she's just suddenly decided she wants a meaningless tattoo and to come with me when mine clearly means so much to me?

I shouldn't have said that she's copying me because that's not really what I meant - it's the fact that she doesn't take the time to think about how much this means to me and instantly makes it about her. Of course she can get as many tattoos as she likes but she's doing it to attract men and look good which is the opposite of why I want one so it would be shadowing how important it will be for me.

I've told her that I haven't planned it yet and will just do it without her knowing.

Sounds like a good idea OP. If she can't understand what this means to you and why you want to do it then don't let her be a part of it. Good luck with the tattoo

You're overreacting, I'm afraid. She can choose to get a tattoo when and where she likes. The act that yours holds a lot of meaning is irrelevant in your reasoning.

Not really, feather. The request was for friend to accompany when she had her tattoo done. To turn that meaningful event into a joint session, which OP does not want.

So the friend's wishes are utterly irrelevant, OP has every right to say "no I don't wish you to accompany me, go some other time." it's NU at all. Friend was being tactless, that's all.

I get you OP.. It's diluting the meaning of it, for you it will be a time to reflect. Maybe she's trying to be supportive but if I were you I would just re-book and not tell her the date. I would want to be on my own without someone getting excited beside me.
I've actually been thinking about one in memory of my dad so I know how you feel