Am I insensitive

[mirroredlife21]

I have fallen out with a friend and im not sure if it's my fault or not. I am having issues with people talking about how ex dp and I share custody of ds who is nine. It works well for us and we are happy with the arrangements, pretty much 50/50 between us both.
Recently I have had someone say that he can't believe I don't have him full time and I'm a lazy mother because I don't have him all the time. I was pretty upset. I spoke to a friend about it, just venting basically. She was very off with me just kind of mumbling along the lines of 'oh that's horrible' I changed the subject because she seemed bothered by it. By the time I got home I had a huge long text from her along the lines of she agreed with other person, and couldn't believe how insensitive I was to talk to her about it because she had a miscarriage two years ago and she would give anything to spend everyday with that baby and she can't and I'm selfish to even bring the subject up with her.
I have had several Miscarriages, I know how heartbreaking it is, but I wouldn't stop my friends from talking about their dc. We've now fallen out because I said I didn't understand what I did wrong and her husband had had a massive rant at me along the same lines as what she said. Was I need to know if I was actually in the wrong?

Jesus. Sounds like she could make literally anything about her. Avoid.

Thank you for your replies.
I understand everyone is different in the way the cope with thing and i was wondering if I'd somehow been insensitive without realising.
She has no children yet and as far as I'm aware she isn't trying, her pregnancy was unplanned, we were very close and she told me it took her by surprise, she is very career and social life orientated, which is why it stunned me when both her and her dh had such a massive go at me. I was there for her a lot when it happened (she didn't tell anyone she was pregnant apart from a couple of us) and I was her go to person for advice/shoulder to cry which I think is why I'm a bit hurt by all of this because J would never intentionally upset someone like that.

Sorry for the typos, I'm on my phone

Its very old fashioned to think a mother trumps a father really how you and his dad raise him is nothing to do with anybody else these friends are totally out of order commenting like that.

What the original guy said is stupid and I don't agree with him, I think I was more bothered that people felt the need to comment on it in the first place. Me and ex have been doing this successfully for the past nearly 4 years and people are STILL commenting on it. I chose the wrong friend to vent to I think :(

YANBU and it's great you and ds's dad have found an agreement that works.

Someone once made a similar comment to me and I wanted to slap her face. (I didn't). This was probably 15 years ago but it still makes me angry now to think about her judging our perfectly reasonable childcare arrangements.
She is being very unreasonable, and having a miscarriage is not an excuse for her behaviour.

You did, however, you should be able rant to a friend. She sounds like she's got a lot of problems, dust yourself off. I've had so called friends having a go at me as well and it really hurt at the time. I now realise that we had already started to drift apart and I no longer consider them friends - just acquaintances that I was once closer to. I've found new ones, who value me far better, so the friendships ended for a reason.

She's trying to make it all about her. Self obsessed drama queen