Aibu or is dh

[twobambinos]

I'll keep it brief.
Dh currently does the dropping and collecting of our dcs 3 days a week as I work those days. The school and childminder is about 5 minutes from where he works.
I have approximately a 45 minute commute to work so I have to leave before them in the morning and if I had to drop the children they would get dropped even earlier to childminder as they are too young to leave at school 45 mins before it commences.

In the evening I am about 30 minutes from the childminder so with him collecting them and me going straight home we arrived home about the same time. Or I might arrive a few minutes before him. In that few minutes I put on a wash or unload or start dinner etc.

Aibu to not be doing more pick ups and drop offs or is he?

Thanks so much

[twobambinos]

Whitephantom I think he wanted me to do flexi time. No one else in my office does it and I don't want to be the Co worker that's resented for leaving "early" especially when I'm not working full time.

[twobambinos]

Tired of sleep. I did just say it to him so I'm going to collect one of my 3 days and if he wants to work late fine and if not go for his run. You are right he would work 100 hours a week if could get away with it

[MrsTerryPratchett]

So he wants you to be 'that worker' but he doesn't want to be one himself. Your time and work is worth less than his. That's what he thinks.

[Oysterbabe]

Why can't he go for a run at 6 after taking the kids home?
I'm still on maternity but when I go back this is the exact set up we'll have, DH doing drop offs and pick ups 3 times a week as nursery is by his work. He'll also be the one they call if DD is unwell or something. He doesn't expect a medal for it.

[mathanxiety]

He is being unreasonable and maybe feeling very sorry for himself.

Stick to your guns. Do not be The Flexitime Woman if nobody else in your office does this. Do not let him guilt you into picking up the children earlier (he says they are at the CMs too late). He is not bothered by the DCs leaving half an hour earlier if they were to be dropped off by you, apparently.

The arrangement you have now is more than fair; you are actually doing a lot of spadework if you are preparing lunches and the pair of you are getting the children up and dressed. Plus you are putting on a load of laundry or prepping dinner when you get home before he does.

Maybe you would like to take off your shoes and sit back with a whisky and soda when you get home? Are you likely to get to do that?

[mathanxiety]

YY to MrsTP

[AyeAmarok]

So he wants you to be 'that worker' but he doesn't want to be one himself. Your time and work is worth less than his. That's what he thinks.

Yup.