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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Feeding dogs chocolate

61 replies

ZestyMaximus · 14/04/2016 09:36

AIBU to get upset and angry at DP when he casually announces that he's fed my dogs chocolate. Again. Despite me having previously, on more than one occasion, told him it's poisonous for dogs and not to feed it to them.

His defense is that it was only a little bit (they're Chihuahuas so it wouldn't take much) and that he used to give his previous dog (Greyhound / Collie mix) the occasional bit and she didn't drop dead. He thinks it's bullshit that chocolate is actually poisonous to dogs.

OP posts:
DontOpenDeadInside · 14/04/2016 10:38

My two are terrible for trying to get ahold of chocolate so it's obvious most dogs enjoy it but that's no reason to actively feed them it!

A dogs sense of smell is 1000 xs more powerful than a humans. Therefore they can smell the chocolate, but they will not enjoy eating chocolate anymore than a dog treat. This is why a lot of dogs eat horse poo. Horse poo is reconstituted grass, which smell sweet. Sweet = nice to dogs, but when they eat it, they cant5taste that its nasty.

pieceofpurplesky · 14/04/2016 10:40

I have a small dog who ended up having his stomach emptied by the vet over Christmas as he ate a small amount of chocolate. It only takes a time amount and depends on the chocolate. Your 'd'p may have been 'lucky' and given them a safer chocolate - next time he may not be so 'lucky' and your poor dogs end up having the same as mine - or worse

AdoraBell · 14/04/2016 10:42

This issue aside, do you wonder if you are wrong about other things because of his reaction? Like, you said he says depression can be cured by simply getting a grip, does this make you think you might be wrong in what you think about depression?

He sounds like the type who would verbally beat you into submission to his will. If he does then it's abusive. I could be wrong, but I don't think I am.

And YADNBU about the dog/chocolate issue.

MadameCholetsDirtySecret · 14/04/2016 10:45

I couldn't continue a relationship with anyone who paid such scant regard to me and more importantly my dog's health.

specialsubject · 14/04/2016 10:49

sounds like a man with a totally closed mind and no capacity for logical thought. Not regarding the dogs, but anyone in 2016 who thinks mental illness can be 'snapped out of' is shockingly ignorant.

why bother? And think very hard before breeding any more of these!

imwithspud · 14/04/2016 10:58

My elderly parents used to do similar with their dog imwith. They used to treat it like a child. Spoiled the dog completely and ended up with a snappy unpleasant terrier which everyone was Hmm about.

Yes they absolutely treat their dog like a child, drives me bonkers. On the whole she is a lovely dog, but can be very needy. Also has had digestive issues which I am sure is related to the amount of unsuitable 'human food' they give her.

ChardonnayKnickertonSmythe · 14/04/2016 10:59

This is so not about the dogs.
Sit him down and try to talk to him op.

He might mean well / in his mind you will see you overreact and you will snap out of it and so he's convinced he's helping you.
I would give him the benefit of the doubt, but will definitely be having words.

MissingPanda · 14/04/2016 11:03

Am I the only one who's wondering why the OP is with someone who is being deliberately cruel to her dogs. It is deliberate cruelty as the OP has explained to him about chocolate being poisonous to dogs and he's still doing it.

OP your P is sending you the message that he'll do what he wants regardless of your feelings and you should just shut up and put up.

Pinkheart5915 · 14/04/2016 11:03

Not unreasonable.

Chocolate is toxic to dogs and can make them very ill. Even if this wasn't the case why would any body give a dog chocolate, why would a dog need to eat chocolate.

CoraPirbright · 14/04/2016 11:06

Feed him a max strength laxative. Well, its not going to kill him, is it? So why not? (going by his theory).

NameChange30 · 14/04/2016 11:09

"According to him, depression can be fixed by just getting a grip and getting out there and being active. Pills are completely unnecessary for anyone. (He's done no research, just his opinion)"

Plus he feeds your dog chocolate when you have repeatedly asked him not to. And argues when you object.

Why are you in a relationship with this twat?

FredaMayor · 14/04/2016 11:10

The issue with theobromine (contained in chocolate) is that it cannot be metabolised in the the liver of a dog and excreted. In humans it can be. So the chemical remains in the liver and exerts a toxic and deleterious effect. The liver can regenerate after damage to a certain extent, but depending on the size of the dog and the cocoa % of the chocolate the harm may be lasting or even fatal.

Good Boy choc drops and the like made for dogs does not contain real chocolate but leads the unwary to think that dogs can tolerate it, albeit wrongly.

Ask the person trying to feed your dog chocolate if he would give alcohol or drugs to a recovering addict. Additionally I thin you should inform the RSPCA and see what they suggest you should do about a person trying to feed your dog a toxin when he/she has been informed of the potential harm.

NameChange30 · 14/04/2016 11:16

Cruelty to pets can be a sign that someone is abusive.

If someone intentionally poisoned my cat I would tell them to leave and not come back. If they did it AGAIN I would never contact or see them again.

I wonder what he has done to make you doubt yourself and feel you have to put up with this.

Original poster
ZestyMaximus · 14/04/2016 11:29

Special - 'breeding any more of these' Haha! That terminology made me laugh. No fear there as he's already got an appointment booked to have the snip Smile

He's usually very open and receptive to most things. Re the mental health comments he's made, he's lucky to have an incredibly strong positive mental attitude but struggles to get his head around the difference between what causes actual depression as opposed to briefly feeling a bit depressed because something bad has happened.

OP posts:
NameChange30 · 14/04/2016 11:34

I don't care, he's a twat.

Tinklewinkle · 14/04/2016 11:36

YANBU in the slightest.

To be honest, it's not really relevant whether it's toxic or not. You've asked him not to give your dogs something so he should be respecting that. Doesn't matter what it is.

We had a very poorly dog when he managed to steal a chocolate cake that I'd just taken out of the oven and left pushed right at the back of the work kitchen top to cool. Fortunately I caught him in the act and was able to phone the OOH vet straight away. The vet asked how much he'd had and when I told him asked how quickly I could get him there. I said 20 minutes, his reply was 'make it 10'. Dog had to have injections to make him sick, his heart was racing and there was concern that he'd fit so he had to stay in. All in all, he was very lucky (plus a £300 vet bill)

ifyoulikepinacolada · 14/04/2016 12:08

The thing is, a lot of the time the dog will be fine (like hetty said) but it's still such an unnecessary risk. Dogs don't need chocolate. I've got a good chance of surviving a game of russian roulette but it only has to go wrong once!

If somebody deliberately fed chocolate to my dogs I'd kick them out of my home. If they did it again i'd report them to the rspca and police - it's illegal to poison a dog with good reason and I'd happily see someone prosecuted for it.

Namechangingchameleon · 14/04/2016 13:28

Good point pinacolada there was a guy jailed last week for giving his neighbours dog walnuts every time it barked :-( also poisonous to them and the poor dog died. Utter cunt!

😢😢😢😢

Knackered69 · 14/04/2016 13:36

Knackereddog ate the advent calendar at Christmas, and had to have an emetic injection at the vet. She also ate the foil at the back and had sparkly poo for the next two days. It was very festive Hmm

It can be hard enough keeping dogs and chocolate apart without someone feeding it to them deliberately!

Costacoffeeplease · 14/04/2016 13:49

He'd be out on his ear if he fed my dogs chocolate - why are you putting up with this twat?

Original poster
ZestyMaximus · 14/04/2016 14:58

That's just it though, he doesn't actually think that he IS poisoning them. He thinks it's bollocks / an old wives tale or similar. He wouldn't do it if he believed it was poisonous. It's the fact that his arrogance and over his previous dog not being affected that allows him to naively believe it's all bunkum and that I'm being over protective / over reacting. He's a good man generally (I wouldn't be with him otherwise, no time or place for that in my life) he's just very stubborn and opinionated on subjects that he's generally done bugger all very little research on.

OP posts:
NameChange30 · 14/04/2016 15:00

He's not a good man
He should respect your request not to give your dog something you don't want it to have

NameChange30 · 14/04/2016 15:00

But if you want to defend him and allow him to poison your dog, it's your choice and the dog's funeral

NameChange30 · 14/04/2016 15:02

If arrogant, stubborn and opinionated (all words that YOU used) is a "good man" I dread to imagine your idea of a "bad man".

Do you think you can't find someone better, is that it?

Original poster
ZestyMaximus · 14/04/2016 15:27

AnotherEmma - I'm defending him in aspects aside from his arrogance re feeding my dogs chocolate. He thinks I'm over reacting but has agreed not to give it to them again. No one is standing idly by and 'allowing' anything. Arrogant, stubborn and opinionated regarding this issue (the one my op is actually about) - yes. In almost all other matters - certainly not.

As for your last comment, this isn't about finding someone better - Nobody is perfect. All relationships have arguments / disagreements etc. Yes, of course I could find someone else who agrees with me re chocolate and dogs but maybe I'd find them lazy with house work. Then move onto someone who kept the house spick and span but didn't respect my parents. Then someone who got on with my parents really well but had different ideas to me about how to manage our finances. DP is, overall a good man.

OP posts: