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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Is it time to move on and leave him behind

10 replies

Xmasbaubles · 07/04/2016 19:50

is it time to move on, boyfriend wont ask adult son to leave, doesnt pay doesn't work, all sorts of excuses and expects all chores done, washing, ironing, dinners cooked. When not at home his son will him and say he is hungry and text down stairs for cups of tea and toast. He only leaves his room to go to football practice and never converses.

I spent 5 weeks living there and only saw him 3 times.The ex wife pops round with food and texts boyfriend regarding sons eating arrangements. Oh btw she lives next door in a rented house. I have talked about how this just isn't right, yet he has ignored my concerns for 3 years. I don't want them in my future with him. When I talk to him he just says it's his Son. I find this ridiculous. Any thoughts or suggestions😬

OP posts:
whois · 07/04/2016 19:52

Yup. Don't get involved.

araiba · 07/04/2016 19:57

you dont live there so keep out

Xmasbaubles · 07/04/2016 20:00

Grin I've been involved fo 5 years, so walk away then as you can see no loyalty short term to my feelings and future

OP posts:
whois · 07/04/2016 20:02

Oh, if you've been with him 5 years what do you like/love about him? Is it enough to make up for the strange home life set up?

Xmasbaubles · 07/04/2016 20:05

I'm in a relationship but I don't feel comfortable with how he allows himself to be treated and it does make me not want to visit. That can be an issue as I will not know or be part of his world if we only have time in my world. I would like to move forward with this but feel limited. Always on my turf

OP posts:
araiba · 07/04/2016 20:07

you will never win against someones flesh and blood

you make it an issue and you have already lost

Xmasbaubles · 07/04/2016 20:09

Lovely kind man, he says he loves me and I do him but this set up for me has come to a head. I guess it's that feeling that I need to know he is there for me and my children not pandering to a selfish Adult Son now who really does need to take care of his self now

OP posts:
Owllady · 07/04/2016 20:10

Is there any reason why the son is sitting up in his room, incapable of making toast? Confused

Xmasbaubles · 07/04/2016 20:13

Araiba I think u are probably right, time to let go now and meet somebody with less baggage

OP posts:
Xmasbaubles · 07/04/2016 20:16

owlady, absolutely none! Just been brought up like it I guess. Just a waster and a taker bf gets angry at times but never follows through with threats. Waste of time

OP posts:
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