AIBU to have an opinion

[Sonicgirl]

Tonight after more trying times I decided to say to my H that we needed to be more careful about food as money was tight. He always cooks - the only chore he does. But he cooks what he wants and how he likes I.e vinegar on salad. I just said it cooks the salad and therefore we can't eat it the next day. The cones the usually tired of the fact that I'm a bitch, shouting at the top of his voice. Tbh I did have a bit of a face on because he cooked exactly what I had eaten for my lunch. But either way does it really mean he gets to shout at me and go off to the pub again. Apparently I cause all the arguments. He has done this three times this week. He says it's because I came off my AD - but psych knows and is supportive and says my mood is low because of our relationship. The only thing the AD's did was to stop me voicing me opinion.

Sorry that was meant to be 'the comes the usual tirade

I'd listen to your dr.

He shouts at u for requesting the vinegar is added when on the plate rather than the whole batch of salad, wow

He needs to get a grip

Apparently I had been up for a fight all night. Even if I had it doesn't mean you can shout and swear me does it and go to the pub AGAIN. (Btw I am the main breadwinner.)

Do you mean you took ADs to cope with your dh's behaviour?

I hope you are alright. It's not ok for him to shout at you like that and storm off to the pub so often.

And we really really can't afford all the pub evenings

It's not normal for him to shout over a request about cooking. You shouldn't be treated like that. It sounds like you'd be better off without this person in your life.

Sometimes when you feel sad and tired and powerless and lethargic and numb it's not depression, sometimes it's because your life is a bit shit.

I don't really have an opinion about vinegar on salad, but I do have an opinion on his reaction.

So basically he tries to engineer arguments with you so he can use them as an excuse to storm off to the pub. He sounds horrible. Poor you.

But if I'm honest usually I wouldn't have said anything but I was still fed up of all the other nights this week where he says I am argumentative if I disagree. I hated the dinner the fact that whilst I put out son to bed tidied and ironed whilst he cooked (he likes cooking). I know I should have just kept my mouth shut but I was cross of always feeling like I have to

I know I should have just kept my mouth shut but I was cross of always feeling like I have to

You shouldn't have to feel that way.

If you're suffering from depression then he should be extra supportive and sensitive to your needs. I wouldn't stand for that behaviour when I'm completely well. My husband and I do not swear at each other. He once told me to 'fuck off' during an argument and I flipped. We both promise not to do that and I think that helps our arguments not to escalate, though we don't argue much any more since we improved how we communicate.
If you can't afford his spending, he does it anyway, it's your money and he treats you like crap, I'd put my income into a separate account so he can't spend it. Doesn't sound like he's grown up enough to have access to the money.