to think that its not unusual for a 7yr old to be 'self-conscious about their body?

[iProcrastinate]

To cut a long story as short as I can - DD is 7 and has recently started to become aware of her own body and nudity.

We live alone, just the two of us and have since she was a tiny baby, I have sole custody and her dad visits every few months - we don't have formal arrangements, I've always said he can visit whenever he wants, DD is happy with his visiting schedule and likes seeing him.

I've never made a fuss over nudity, never drawn attention to it when she is dressing or bathing, until a few months ago she wasn't bothered by it and would happily change/bathe infront of anyone, but recently she has decided that she would rather not be seen by people (other than me) when she is naked, I thought fair enough she is a growing girl and her privacy and feelings need respecting.

Her dad was not impressed, challenged me over it and said that when he and his fiancée visit they will be bathing her etc as they like to do that, and if she has a problem with it then it is my fault, and I have 'done something to her' to make her 'paranoid'.

AIBU to think that becoming conscious over their body is normal for a growing child? And not unusual for a 7yr old? I'm not sure if I'm more worried about his accusation or the thought that I've not handled this right and made her uncomfortable :(

Him and the fiancé's enjoyment of bathing her doesn't trump her wish for privacy. If he chooses to only visit every few months then that may contribute to her not feeling as unselfconscious around him as she does with you.

Goodness me, my 8 year old dd is very private about her body and would not want someone bathing her. Your ex dh has no right to insist on bathing her.

Considering she could be starting puberty in the next couple of years YADNBU! Poor kid. At least you sound sensible. Her dad sounds ridiculous.

Ditto swim suit advice ... But only if daughter still wants to have bath time in front of dad .

YANBU. He sounds controlling and it's inappropriate for him to insist on bathing her at an age where she can bathe herself and doesn't want him to see her naked. Hopefully it's just that he can't deal with his little girl growing up but he should respect her boundaries.