to be terrified of going to an AA meeting for the first time?

[AreBags]

I'm a big drinker. I always have been - I used to spend my pocket money on vodka to drink alone at the age of 15. I need to change.
My last relationship broke down almost solely because of my drinking and it affects my life in all manner of other ways. I'm constantly anxious and I know that I'm ruining my life.
So today I've decided to stop, but there's no way I can do it alone. I've been looking at AA meetings in my area and there's one at 1pm but I'm TERRIFIED - what should I expect?

Thanks bikerunski - I'll look another area nearby.

OP I will be very interested to hear how you got on if you have the time to tell us.

Hello everyone. Sorry, alive but didn't want to post out of embarrassment but am swallowing my pride because after the support it'd be stupid to not come back.

I went on Friday and it wasn't running - the guy in the church didn't have any idea why but I wish I'd checked! There were loads of others over the weekend but I've not been to any. I have only had one drink a day though and even went out for a meal earlier without drinking - which is one of the things that usually sets off a night of chaos.

I've decided to slow down as much as I can this week on my own and go to one that's closer to me on Friday evening - as this is a usual drinking/pub day for me and I think it would make logical sense to 'replace' that with a meeting.

Sorry for letting you all down - i'll pop back and let you know how Friday goes/how the rest of the week goes

Hi OP - you haven't let any of us down. You don't owe us anything. You have done really well by the sounds of it and you are thinking along the right lines. Keep it up.

Well done OP. It took great courage to make the move to go to the meeting. Hold on to that strength and go to another meeting when you feel ready x

Just remember everybody in that room has been in the same position. You will truly get the understanding you need. Good luck you know you can do this.

Don't feel bad at all - you did well to try and turn up, and it must have felt very disappointing for you to have built up the courage and then to have to try again next week. IN the same situation some people (e.g. ME) would have rushed away feeling stupid and rejected and immediately soothed my hurt with a load of alcohol

Your plan for this week sounds good - especially Friday replacing your drinking with a meeting. Use this week as an experiment - notice whether there are particular time when it feels difficult to resist a drink, notice whether it is easy or difficult to stop after one drink. Don't judge yourself for whatever you do simply use it as a way of finding out more about what drives you, and what helps you. Good luck! It's a journey that is well worth making