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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Noisy neighbours - acoustic barrier fencing - AIBU to ask them to pay half?

82 replies

angelos02 · 14/03/2016 15:23

Our neighbours seem lovely enough but are elderly and they have their radio on, all day every day, at a volume so loud we can hear it across 2 driveways plus the width of our garden away. I know I should be more easy-going due to their age but surely this is not on?

DH and I have asked them time and again to turn their music down - just at the weekends when we are not at work (as a compromise) and they are fine for a day or so then it creeps back up again.

We have looked into acoustic fencing but I don't know whether or not it will work and it will cost alot of money that we will struggle to find.

Any suggestions or recommendations would be appreciated. I was out of work and suffered from depression last summer and this made it so much worse as I was stuck in the house every day.

OP posts:

Original poster

angelos02 · 14/03/2016 16:33

I do understand the comment. What I don't understand is that they haven't changed their behaviour out of consideration for their neighbours.

Guess I'll have to think of a plan B.

OP posts:

Arpege · 14/03/2016 16:35

Oh my god you're so rude!

You're neighbour's probably have hearing issues. I think YABVU

Nicky333 · 14/03/2016 16:35

You did not understand the comment:

they think it's on quiet so taken them round to hear could backfire dramatically if they're saying "can't hear it at all. Whatever are you moaning about?"

I've copied it so you have chance to read it again.

ElementaryMyDear · 14/03/2016 16:36

Do you know whether the neighbours on the other side have complained at all? It might be worth talking to them about it.

BombadierFritz · 14/03/2016 16:36

No need to be so rude to people on here

Do they have family who visit that you could try to have a word with? If you have spoken to them already, environmental health might be the next step. Sounds like they might be deaf?

Original poster

angelos02 · 14/03/2016 16:39

The neighbour's side-door faces directly into our garden so the other neighbours won't be able to hear it so it won't be an issue for them.

It is a real shame as one of the main reasons I bought the house was for the beautiful garden. I don't want to move but if this isn't resolved, I'll have no choice.

OP posts:

pictish · 14/03/2016 16:40

If you understand then why haven't you apologised? She's not being patronising, she's politely making clear her intention because you misunderstood.

JanetOfTheApes · 14/03/2016 16:40

You don't understand why they haven't changed their behaviour? Perhaps because they feel you are being unreasonable and so have no need to change their behaviour (you would realise this if you understood the comments you say you do).

ElementaryMyDear · 14/03/2016 16:40

OP, do you know if you have sensory sensitivity? I'm wondering whether you're unusually sensitive to noise, as that can make normal volumes seem louder and can make noise extremely distracting and distressing.

The other possibility may well be that your neighbours are hard of hearing but possibly don't realise it, therefore they genuinely don't see what the problem is and anyway can't turn the radio down because they won't hear it.

Unless there's any chance of persuading your neighbours to look into hearing aids and/or wear headphones, I'm wondering whether noise cancelling headphones might be helpful to you?

Original poster

angelos02 · 14/03/2016 16:40

It is a detached home so I never imagined that noise would ever be an issue.

OP posts:

Original poster

angelos02 · 14/03/2016 16:42

I understand that they are probably hard of hearing but now that they know their radio is so loud that their neighbours can hear it, surely they would move the radio to somewhere that we cannot hear it?

OP posts:

SquinkiesRule · 14/03/2016 16:44

Maybe they have the radio near the backdoor. Moving it further into the house might help. You need to go and talk to them again, maybe even have one of them with good hearing come and stand on your side and see how loud it is. Ask about them moving it see if that helps.

cricketqueen · 14/03/2016 16:51

I hope you are politer when you talk to them. I doubt they are doing it on purpose. It probably goes like this:- you go ask them to turn it down, they turn it down,2 days later one of them turns it up because they can't hear it because they are going deaf. So the cycle begins again. See if you can get them to move it somewhere else in the house but be prepared that they might not be able to. Or talk to their family about how you are concerned that they are struggling to hear.
You could talk to environmental health but I don't know how much use it could be if you can only hear the noise in your garden. People perceive noise differently so be aware that there may be nothing anyone can do.

Original poster

angelos02 · 14/03/2016 16:52

I apologise witchend. I did originally mis-read your post.

Actually, this thread has put the situation into a better perspective and given me some things to think about so thank you.

OP posts:

specialsubject · 14/03/2016 17:08

wow, it is MN that is over-sensitive here. Loud music is FUCKING SELFISH unless it is a very occasional party or you live on a desert island. People should use headphones if they want music outside.

I can fully understand that the OP is being driven to distraction.

if the neighbours are hard of hearing that's no excuse. I know plenty of people who are hard of hearing and don't do this.

it needs to be explained to the neighbours that they are distressing someone. They can use headphones, buy hearing aids, or go indoors with the radio and close doors and windows. Like decent human beings do.

'I can hear your radio clearly, 2 gardens away, I'm sure you'll agree that is not fair on me'. Anyone feel this is unreasonable?

NeedACleverNN · 14/03/2016 17:26

Although it's an annoyance, realistically can environmental health do anything?

It's in the day time so not unsociable hours.

I do agree they could be deaf.

I am deaf and occasionally turn the telly up to a level I can hear. Most of the time it's fine, occasionally my dh points out that it's louder than it needs to be but I don't realise it

Nanny0gg · 14/03/2016 17:33

Surely noise nuisance is a nuisance whatever the time of day? You absolutely shouldn't be able to hear what is going on in the neighbour's house that clearly.

Definitely ring the council.

mummymeister · 14/03/2016 17:42

A noise can be a nuisance at any time of the day or night.

what is taken into account is level, duration, tonal quality, frequency and a few other things. don't want to bore everyone about it.

OP, please try to sort the problem out in another way first before getting the council involved. consider also mediation which your local CAB should be able to point you in the right direction of.

escalating neighbour disputes by getting a third party involved rarely ends well and could make life very stressful for you.

Ifiwasabadger · 14/03/2016 18:21

Mumsnet is a strange place. I remember a similar thread not long ago with an OP listening to music from her iPad in the garden. We were joking about her taste in music.it was a hot sunny day and a one off.

It quickly deteriorated into how awful she was for listening to her iPad outside.

Yet there's plenty of sympathy for the radio players here.

Odd.

JanetOfTheApes · 14/03/2016 19:37

Not odd at all as soon as you realise that MN has hundreds of thousands of posters, so its quite likely that the people answering that thread are not the people answering this one.

And if the OP wasn't so rude to people she might have got more sympathy!

Woobeedoo · 14/03/2016 20:46

Environmental Health can do something - music doesn't have to be loud at night for it to be considered a nuisance. My next but two neighbour had a stereo and speakers hanging in her garden and it'd be on loud. The Summer went from being lovely (birds chirruping and the odd distant hum of a lawn mower) to Celine Dion warbling about her heart going on at a ridiculous volume from 9am til 8pm or later.

She was asked repeatedly by many neighbours for it to be turned down. It would be. Then it'd creep up to even louder. In the end she had her stereo confiscated. I think the saying is that people have a right to peaceful enjoyment of their own home (and garden). Or something like that.

whois · 14/03/2016 21:07

It's not patronising. You read the comment wrong and then were really rude. And you're still being rude. And I still don't think you've fully understood the comment!

Witch was trying to be helpful. You are being pretty aggressive in your posting.

whois · 14/03/2016 21:09

Although I don't think you're being U about the noise. It's crap having to listen to other people's radio in your own garden.

pictish · 14/03/2016 23:09

I looooong to listen to the radio in my garden but I don't as fear would be annoying for the neighbours.

Would quite like a house with no neighbours to speak of.

Moopsboopsmum · 15/03/2016 04:14

Oh dear OP, I think the problem here might be - you. Sorry.

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