AIBU to stop dealing with former owners mail?

[mistydaytoday]

We bought our house 18 months ago. The former owner has a range of different business activities that used this address - different company names etc. I also get his ton of junk mail.

For a couple of months after he moved out he'd pitch up at the house randomly to collect a pile of mail. He won't give us a forwarding address although we've asked a few times. Instead he has asked us to send him a text message, and he'll pop by and collect it, commenting once, 'This works quite well'. (We had the bailiffs pitch once looking for him so we think there might be some reason why he's not giving us his new address!)

It doesn't work for me: I don't like the former owner constantly at my house, commenting on changes I've made to the place etc. I don't want to have a discussion about it either.

Thing is, a flurry even more mail is coming now, including mail from HMRC and companies house and other important looking envelopes.

I've recently given his mail back to the Postie who is very apologetic by the amount and has said the mail will be returned to the senders address on the envelope. DH has even contacted a couple of companies by phone and asked them to remove our address from this guy's record.

But I know the former owner is probably waiting for us to text him that mail is waiting for him at our house again. And that he expects to pop by and have a nosey and get his mail.

I've really had enough, but AIBU?

Also, if I am NBU, what do I do with the mail that doesn't have a return address on it?

Whenever I get mail for previous residents I RTS with a note on the envelope saying when we moved in, so Return to Sender - not at this address since 08/2014.

I've also taken mail into banks, govt departments and the courts with proof of when we moved in. I figured they were the most important ones to sort out.

YANBU - if giving it back to the postman worked that one time (and those items didn't come back to your address) you could save it up to give back to the postman when you see him (assuming you are quite often in when the post comes). Otherwise I always do as others suggest and write

"not known at this address"

or a version of that on the envelope.

and put it back in a post box obviously.

Although if bailiffs have come by and you are concerned they are using your address to conduct some dodgy business - which could impact on your credit rating - is that not a 'reasonable excuse'?

I also sort of feel intercept and throw away isn't the same thing as post that keeps coming to your house. We moved in 3 years ago and still get occasional post for the old owners. I have CFS/ME and its actually a lot of effort for me to get to a postbox and put a return-to-sender post in. I do sometimes, but as I can get there so rarely and if it's been months, I'll often just recycle stuff that looks like it's probably advertisements anyway to keep it from cluttering up my house.

Nope peace, once it's in your house, it's yours. Fraud is illegal, hence the 'detriment' bit. Reasonable reason in my eyes is curiosity. Also remember, they'd have to prove it too. After reading all about the old owners bank details I burn the opened mail.

I would text him..Tell him you are no longer accepting any post to your address.. I would return to sender.. I had issue with bank and wouldn't take removal of address over phone or with return to sender I had to take letter into bank but didn't want my address linked to previous owner now..

I would also return to sender but equally open and check no fraud or debt been put against your address.. I can't imagine a situation where anyone is charged...I occasionally get post for previous owner been here 6 years..Last year I traced someone who sends a card from US every year via fb...

Return it to sender, he's being unreasonable here and youve been very cooperative up to this point

You're basically letting this guy commit all the fraud he wants. He could be taking out all sorts of loans or running a super dodgy business and you're enabling him to do so. I'm just amazed you've let this go on for so long. You could end up being in trouble for enabling his dodgy deeds.

Return everything to sender. If the mail persists then get in contact with the companies to explain the situation.

Our previous owner, as well as the tenants who were there immediately before we bought the house, had post at our house for years - I think we still got some the other day, 11 years on.

This included:
Plain brown envelope versions of the kind of mail that ends up in your junk email box asking if you'd like to expand portions of your anatomy (I didn't even know it came in paper form, you live and learn).
Various bills.
Appointment with a counsellor (NHS postmark, you could see what it was through the window).
Multiple payslips from my employer that the former resident also worked for (I know what they are from looking at them as I get them myself obviously, though mine arrive at my work address). I opened one of them by accident because the logo from work was a lot larger than the slightly faded name etc. so I assumed mine had arrived at home for some reason.

We just put everything back in the post box with "not at this address". I think we have rung up a couple of people, to be kind (the NHS appointment, and my employer's HR department).

We still get mail 6 years on. Our ndn is still in touch with them so I do pass it to them but it is annoying after so long. Most of the letters are crap and some of the kids still hasn't updated the important stuff. I still pass it to the ndn but I don't rush to do it.

No Dagger I disagree that once it's in your house 'it's yours' as does the law. Whether people are prosecuted is a separate matter, you are opening mail without reasonable excuse.

He's had plenty time to inform companies, banks, govt bodies etc where he has moved to.
He could have paid for a redirect.
His mail is not your problem. Is he paying you to work as a post office or mail service?

Magic marker to score out name and address.
Mark as not living here since( date).
Pop back in post box.

I still get post for the previous owner of my house. After one noticeable incident where I marked it "not at this address" and the postie still redelivered it back to me, I now have white sticky labels to cover my address over, and a red ink "Not at this address, return to sender" stamp to stamp over the label.

Ugh! NHS appointments! We've missed several because they can't seem to update our address and keep sending it to our old address. Only knew because GP followed up on lack of appointment after referral, and they claimed I was 'no show', but he was able to get a copy of the appointment letter which was sent to our old address. I must have phoned half a dozen times by now, and I thought it was sorted. But my last specialist appointment came with my old address on the letterhead crossed out, with a date two months before I actually received it.

You owe him nothing.

Return to sender.

I got so sick of hand writing "not known at this address - return to sender", that I bought a stamp that stamps out that message in red ink. It's very satisfying!

We had this problem.

You can buy big sheets of fluorescent 'return to sender -addressee unknown' stickers. I found it very therapeutic to sit and sticker a pile of stray post once a week. Eventually the stream slowed to a trickle.

You've been more than reasonable with him. He has chosen not to make forwarding arrangements. I think you are more than justified in pulling the plug now.

Oh get you with your stamp I am going to start writing not here since see if that works I spoke to the post man and he said he has to deliver the addressed post

Have you checked your credit rating? If he's still using your address as his own it could have an impact on you. Better you know now while you have time to sort it out rather than at some future point when you're trying to remortgage.

What everyone else has said, text him to tell him that enough is enough and everything from now will be RTS. He's had 18 months to sort it out and you are not his mail forwarding service.

I would tell him that you aren't doing this any more and then return all the post to sender and after a period of time (maybe 6 months to be generous) I would bin all post.

I think you have been far nicer than most would have been.

'This works quite well'.

I'm sorry you're having to deal with this but this ^ made me laugh out loud.

Cheeky git!

Bin it.

Whenever I get mail for previous residents I RTS with a note on the envelope saying when we moved in, so Return to Sender - not at this address since 08/2014.

That's what we do too, except that it has been since 2007 in our case. To be fair it's only the odd letter now and again.

Ugh! NHS appointments! We've missed several because they can't seem to update our address and keep sending it to our old address. Only knew because GP followed up on lack of appointment after referral, and they claimed I was 'no show', but he was able to get a copy of the appointment letter which was sent to our old address.

This happened to me. An initial referral was cancelled because I no showed. GP re-requested, same thing. 3rd time, the appointment letter was redirected from our old address. Mystery solved.

Or so we thought. Despite seeing my consultant 5 times dictate a change of address over the next 18 months, all appointments went to the old address. Every time I complained, they checked the system - which was correct.

Finally, I was stuck in hospital for a series of tests and a doctor gave me my notes and asked me to visit a department on the floor above. I looked in my notes and found a sheet of pre-printed address labels - with my old address. I quietly put it in the bin, and haver had no problems since.

The thing is, everyone I have mentioned this to in the NHS has told me I'm "mistaken" as "they don't do that". Big hairy bollocks. Sadly this was before cameraphones ....

OP, YADNBU. The guy has a serious cheek expecting you to manage his mail for him. I would text him and tell him that he can collect his last few bits of post on x date, but after that everything will be going straight in the bin as you are the owner of a house, not a sorting office. If he has an issue with that then tough. What is he going to do about it?

We’ve been in our (owned) house now for the best part of 2.5 years. Prior to us moving in it had been empty for about 6 months, prior to that it was let out for several years. We were getting post for the previous owners (divorced before they sold), his new fiancée, recent tenants, old tenants – the lot. We got monthly bank account statements from Barclays for someone who wasn’t the most recent tenant. Barclays refused to stop sending, despite my calls and numerous returned to sender statements. So eventually stopped caring and started opening. He was very overdrawn. We also, about a year/18 months in to living there, received a mortgage letter for a property the previous owner and his ex wife owned.

The most recent tenant (whom hasn’t lived there for almost three years now) was being investigated for benefit fraud. She had gone to our local MP to try and get out of owing any money, so about 4 months ago we received this very official letter from Westminster in her name. Given that a lot of time has passed, I opened it. It made for quite a good read to be fair, finding out that she had moved in her partner without declaring it . Other letters we got fairly regularly were from her child’s school/dentist, utility/cable companies chasing overdues, collection agencies etc.

I now open everything because I am fed up with twats not changing their address a nosy sod and then take it to work to dispose of in our confidential waste bin. Returning to sender I tried for long enough. Part of me thinks that RM don’t actually return to sender half the time. Still, if you move out of a property and you are stupid enough to not have important mail redirected, why should the new owner/tenant bother?

A friend of mine lets out a property, and had some tenants do a runner without notifying him or the lettings agents. He found out about two months after they’d gone, and the house was left with a decent amount of damage and mess. Pissed off with their stunt, he started Googling them, and found that they had some not so secure social media accounts on which they were posting using location services. My friend quickly worked out they had moved in with the guy’s mother, managed to trace the exact address, and then passed it to every bailiff who came knocking. The bailiffs were very grateful .

Of course YANBU. Write on the envelopes 'return to sender' etc and put back in the post box. It's not your problem that some don't have return addresses on them, the owner should have things in order by now a few weeks or months then yes i think it's being nice but that is taking the p*ss now. Sounds like he is up to something dogdy so don't take any more for him.