to think those of us born into stable, functioning family units are pretty bloody lucky?

[DolphinsandDinosaurs]

I've just been watching a programme, I think it was channel 4, where celebrities try sleeping on the streets, and mixing with people who are homeless. They met a couple of genuine homeless people, and tried hard to persuade them to contact their Mums parents for help.

It made me really cross, the idea that if you contact Mum it will all be OK. This is something that a lot of us take for granted, but it seemed so naive in the context of a programme like that.

Surely they should realise that a lot of people are on the streets because they don't have that support at home. They come from chaotic backgrounds and never had a bloody chance!

Sorry, I have had a couple of glasses of wine, but it does amaze me how much of a bubble so many of us live in, and saddens me to realise how hopeless so many people's lives are!

I'm in the US, so I don't know how the numbers translate, but the homeless rates here for adults who were foster children is shocking.

The thing is though that even those parents/families who would take their kids in sometimes can't because of their own circumstances.

I agree. I'm 43 and I still have a room at my parent's house. It's such a relief to know that if my life goes tits up I will always have a home with them.

You have articulated exactly how I want my daughters' to feel, because I have never had that feeling myself. It is hard to lose the warm glow of home and I do think its loss has destabilised my adult life (mum had an affair & walked out when I was 17, family house sold & both parents moved on with new partners).

I have been risk averse and passed up opportunities because I knew I did not have a safety net. Thank god for my lovely DH - home is with him, but I should rely on my husband as an emotional crutch in that way.

A few years ago we asked the 15 year old daughter of friends to baby sit for an hour or so for us in Macdonalds next to the theatre where we needed to watch our oldest daughter in a school production. She came and did it and wouldn't take any money. We went off one way and she bounced off the other way to get the bus home. Just round the corner from our house we bumped in to a young man who's face was covered in blood. He'd got in to a fight over a girl and been beaten up. We wanted to call an ambulance but he wouldn't stay. So we wiped up the blood as best we could and told him where we lived. He came round a few minutes later and we cleaned him up properly, tried to persuade him to let us take him to A&E and then when he still refused dh gave him a lift home to the place he was sleeping on a sofa in. He wouldn't tell us his age but he was clearly very young, I thought 15. And that's what has stayed with me - on that day we talked to two 15 yr olds. One had a home and parental and wider family love and support. Her life chances are infinite really and she looked like somebody was looking after her. It shone out of her. The lad had none of that. In a dangerous situation, with nobody to look after him and reliant on strangers for a lift 'home' so at least he didn't get beaten up again.

Dh and I both went to university, we have a decent standard of living, lots of books in the house, have been able to have a family holiday etc etc. Far more than any of that, the single greatest advantage we are giving our kids is a stable and loving home. It's really important to recognise that.

Yes, having been loved gives you a confidence you don't even notice. It's nice, the idea of being born into confidence.

The playing field is hugely uneven because of this.

My parents are not perfect but pretty close and the amount of just, everything, they've invested in our family is something I know has given me more than anything I've achieved by myself - as if they're even separable, to be honest.