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AIBU?

to not really get Paris

181 replies

JapanNextYear · 09/03/2016 14:18

I have had some lovely holidays in France, the food, the wine etc. And I have a huge fondness for being in a capital city.

But I just don't really get Paris. I've been to the touristy bits and the not touristy bits, but I find it all a bit cold and distant and its hard to get a decent meal or have a nice drink.

What am I doing wrong?

OP posts:
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ArgyMargy · 09/03/2016 22:36

Oh so this a thread where the OP can show off about all the capital cities she's been to and slag off Paris at the same time? YABU. Paris is awesome. Learn some French and visit a cemetery for the lolz.

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JaceLancs · 09/03/2016 22:37

Spent a lot of time in Paris when younger (part French) in recent years, revisited with my children, so many happy memories spoiled and will not return
Even some of my French relatives from other areas avoid Paris if at all possible

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ArgyMargy · 09/03/2016 22:38

"I have heard Parisians can be rude as well."

Well - hold the front page!!

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LoucheLady · 10/03/2016 18:48

a delightful paedophile in his 60's wearing an old mac taking pics of dd on his mobile

AKA a bloke taking pictures in a park. I thought MN disapproved of paedogeddon.

as for brownies like me I imagine most of them are immigrants

I don't know what kind of brownie you are crystal obviously but um, there are an awful lot of brown French people. The entire populations of Guadeloupe and Martinique for a start. You wouldn't get very far telling them they're not French. And second-generation immigrants born to Senegalese parents are as French as a kid born to Pakistani parents in the UK is British.

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clockbuscanada · 10/03/2016 19:07

For the poster who wanted to know more about sexual harassment in Paris www.independent.co.uk/news/world/europe/every-woman-in-paris-polled-in-survey-has-experienced-sexual-harassment-on-trains-10184658.html I was a student there in the mid-90s, and learned very quickly never to wear a skirt if I didn't want a random man's hand up it. I saw a man tossing himself off behind a gravestone in Pere Lachaise. You don't get that in the Necropolis (I now live in Glasgow... spooky).

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AgentCooper · 10/03/2016 19:40

Oh we've got our fair share of wankers in Glasgow's dear green places, Necropolis included clock (speaking as a lifelong Glaswegian) Grin Though usually the wanking is less unsettling than the smack paraphernalia. I even saw a guy tossing off in on a quiet road in Milngavie once!

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clockbuscanada · 10/03/2016 20:16

Well I never. 20 years of living in the East End and al fresco wanking is still on my to do list.

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Baconyum · 10/03/2016 20:30

I've lived and visited lots of cities, they all have good and bad areas with regard to drink/drugs/random wankers Grin

But some are just more welcoming to visitors/newbies, better looked after in terms of cleanliness, building and transport maintenance, tourist attraction organisation/support etc.

Someone once tried to tell me there's no rough parts in Oxford! Grin aye on ye go then spend a night in blackbird leys!

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LoucheLady · 10/03/2016 20:36

I'm not convinced Paris is that much worse than London for sexual harassment. I've been taking the metro pretty much every weekday for nigh on twenty years and in that time I've seen maybe three incidents. The 100% of women sexually harassed claim surprised me so I looked up the methodology. Turns out it's based on a survey of 60 women at a debate on gender in public space, so hardly a full representative sample. Meanwhile, TfL figures have 43% of women harassed on the London transport system.

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Chrisinthemorning · 10/03/2016 20:36

Never been, don't really have s big urge to go. It sounds chilly. I prefer hot holidays

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clockbuscanada · 10/03/2016 21:05

I lived there for only a few months (20-some years ago) and was sexually assaulted four times during daylight hours in busy public spaces and street harassed many many more times. My experience was typical of my peers, most of whom were like me in terms of background (inner city, shit school etc) and reasonably streetwise. IME it's the worst of the major European and U.S. cities I've lived in for sexual harassment but realise that my experience and those of my peers could well be just some freak coincidence. And hopefully it's got better since then, but my heart did sink when I read the survey. I loved my time living in Paris and do go back for a few days every couple of years but have always been with my partner so haven't travelled alone since.

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LoucheLady · 10/03/2016 21:12

I'm not denying sexual harassment happens here, of course it does. But I'd be willing to bet that pretty well every woman in London has been street harassed at some point or other as well.

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LoucheLady · 10/03/2016 21:17

Oh and further to my post above at 20:36:00, that 43% is women to have experienced harassment within the last year as opposed to the French survey's ever.

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PutDownThatLaptop · 10/03/2016 21:17

I don't get it at all. Much prefer Rome by a mile.

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ToastedOrFresh · 10/03/2016 21:34

I've got fond memories of Paris. My boyfriend, now husband took me there when we were dating back in 1992.

I'd never been before but I'd heard it was romantic. I was not disappointed. Tuilleries garden was lovely. I remember the ice cream stalls. I'd never seen myrtle as an ice cream flavour before. We walked to a cathedral that overlooks the city, probably Monmatre. We had a lovely meal at the Oyster Bar. It was just amazing. We had a meal at a modest café for lunch, the waiter added up the bill, (l'addision) on the paper table cloth. Le Liteau is/was a café off the Champs Elysee we had lovely steak there. We walked across Place De La concord which was once where the public executions took place back in history.

We met in London and went on a date in Paris. Beat that.

It was great in 2007 when we passed through from Paris Nord to Paris Sud stopping for lunch before getting the train to the champagne producing area of France for my milestone birthday.

I revisited Paris in 2010 as I was taking part in the Paris marathon. Yes I've run through the Pont D'Alma tunnel, yes I've seen/run past the stanchion (sp) post that Princess Diana's chauffer driven car crashed into. The N7 ? motorway was at a standstill as I ran over a motorway bridge. Now that's a big scary, angry looking motorway.

I'm sorry that people have had a bad experience of Paris.

In 2010 we, that's my husband and I, stayed in St. Martin at a self catering apartment at Magenta. All good. It was quite noticeable that there were just SO MANY (hot, dirty) hairdressing salons run by African women for African women with their men waiting outside holding their purses or their car keys. Also, the clothes shops there seems to have 1970's fashions with 1970's mannequins in the shop windows, which I thought was odd for Paris.

Also, an African man was calling out to a local girl or girls, 'cafe fils ?' Which they ignored. What was the deal with that, asking, 'cafe, girl ?' I'm assuming he was not well intentioned.

The underground trains are double decker so you get more people on board. London Underground take note. OK, the Paris Metro stinks of piss, but it puts another dimension on the experience.

We've been on holiday to Cannes too. I can't speak much French but there was one girl there, in Cannes, who was speaking French on account of the fact that she was French and I guessed from her body language alone that she was from Paris. I'm not even saying she was being arrogant. Just confident, poised, quick in her speech and movement.

Paris isn't perfect but it's good. IMO.

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clockbuscanada · 10/03/2016 21:53

Maybe I'm not expressing myself well. I didn't mean to suggest that street harassment doesn't exist outside Paris. For me, coming from the UK, I found it a shock to the system to be hissed, clicked, followed or mumbled at in a vaguely threatening way multiple times a day, in a crowded place in broad daylight, vs the once a week "oi, tits!" out of a fast moving car window or whatever.

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LizKeen · 10/03/2016 21:56

This thread makes me sad. We were hoping to go to Paris later this year. I have wanted to go forever.

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theycallmemellojello · 10/03/2016 21:56

Ahh no I love paris! You've got to own the snootiness. I love pootling round the marais. And so many lovely places to eat! Yum.

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HortonWho · 10/03/2016 22:01

Last time I went, we got off the Eurostar, exited the train station and a guy was taking a piss right up against the outside wall, spraying everything (including himself). Went around to main entrance, crossed the street, woman squatting on pavement, pissing. People just went around her like she was old news.

Maybe it's all the dog shit in the streets that has made Parisians so tolerant to relieving oneself in public.

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ArgyMargy · 10/03/2016 22:05

LizKeen ignore all the miserable gits here. Go to Paris. You will love it, I promise.

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ChoudeBruxelles · 10/03/2016 22:06

Le marais is fabulous for wandering round. So is the 5th loads of little streets with great little cafes and restaurants.

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Twowrongsdontmakearight · 10/03/2016 22:30

I think how much you enjoy a place depends on many factors - when you go, who with, where you stay, the weather and who you meet etc. Same with any big city. If you stay in a rough area and focus on overpriced tourist attractions and tat shops.

I wasn't too keen the first time I went to Paris but that might be because we stayed in a grotty part and rushed to do all of the sights.

But other times I've been I've always stayed in a nice part like the 5th or 6th and not tried to pack too much in. A museum or something in the morning and an afternoon with a baguette lunch reading in the park or mooching round market stalls. Lovely!

NB. Barcelona is still my favourite city though!

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ABetaDad1 · 10/03/2016 22:38

Hurrah. I have found loads of people who hate Paris or at least don't get it! Grin

DW absolutely luuuuurves Paris.

You know why I hate it? Its the boulevards. Really. The reason I hate it is the boulevards.

They were designed that way deliberately as 'killing fields'. Paris was redesigned to prevent its citizens overthrowing the Govt.

The boulevards were designed to be long and straight to fire grapeshot down from cannons or charge horses down to cut crowds to pieces with curassiers.

Paris is a city deliberately designed to kill people and stop people expressing their opposition to the rule of Govt.

I do like the left bank more with its small streets. I like France in general.

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TwitTwatTwunt · 10/03/2016 22:41

Been 5 times a year for a week at a time for the past decade for work. I hate the place! Rude, arrogant folk (not all but MANY!) Parisiens are up their own arse in a way that I've never encounted in other capitals.
And mostly they don't like the English/British!

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Kennington · 10/03/2016 22:48

Don't remember if I posted before but I do love Paris and the French.
Sexual harassment is So much more frequent there than in London - where nought has ever happened.
I work in Paris on and off and I find the metro quite ropey in terms of harassment.

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