To disagree that going to watch a football match 45 mins away isn't 'having a couple of hours off'

[Doublejeopardy]

It is in fact having a day to yourself?

I don't mind except I have a shitty cold but I want an hour to MN on the bed and then look after the DC for the day this should be uninterrupted peace and quiet ?

It's fine as long as you get equal time out 20 weekends a year. It sounds like you don't. And you're asked not to do your stuff so he can spend time with you. Cheeky fucker.

Also Hermione take away out as we are going out later but otherwise that would have been my plan!

Out with the kids we struggle with sitters no family close by.

So he is home to do cooking some days during the week?

And at weekends?

And more washing. Write down what you do in a weekly basis. Then wrote down what he does and go from there.

Changes clearly need to be made. You aren't happy. Him asking you to not go to stuff, if he wouldn't do the same is not on.

Dh would never ask me not to go to my hobby. I wouldn't him.

I don't think it goes on earning power, it goes on how many hours you are out of the house.

Somethings he may not be able to share. But the things he can, he needs to do.

Thanks Clopy.

I think I might try writing down everything I do next week and asking him what he would like to take on, then leaving him to deal with the consequences but it's not that simple always is it.

I would say 7.15pm is a bit alte to be starting dinner for children (age-dependant). But he could definitely cook at the weekends, and yes, wash up or do laundry in the evenings too. What excuse does he give for not doing those things?

DP works longer hours than me, but he still does his fair share - mostly at weekends, but it means I can get my share done during the week and chill while he runs the hoover round

Yes it's much too late the youngest is often in bed but it never occurs to him to hang up the washing, put a liar in the washing machine without me prompting.

He doesn't cook at the weekend unless I ask and even then he won't cook what is planned and go and spend another £20 on what he fancies.

Don't get me wrong he's not bad just tired from commuting, I however am tired from doing lots too.

It's only "all day" because it's 11-4 so if you had wanted to do anything as a family you now can't.

Five hours for a 3 pm kickoff (leave after lunch, back for dinner) would be "half a day" and you could have done something in the morning.

Two miles down the road to watch your local non-league slither around a muddy pitch would be "a couple of hours to himself".

Asking you to miss out on stuff you'd like to do so he can spend time with you is just a joke.

Dh and Ds are season ticket holders while dd works at the stadium. A 3pm kick off means they leave about 11.30 and get home about 7pm so it is nearly a full day for us.

If he's a spurs fan LTB!

I'd see going to a match as pretty much a full day out - although maybe not so much a lunch time or evening kick off.