I'm 17 and I need some urgent accomodation advice - sorry for BU!

[GeezLouise1998]

I know IABU for posting here for traffic, but I'm really desperate.

I have been living with my so called 'partner' for the last year but off and on I have been going back and forth to my Mum's house. Last time I went back, because he wanted me out again, I was told by my family that they love me to bits but cannot keep on this way - this would be the last time they pick me up and come to my rescue. of course, wanting everything to work out and trying to put the worst behind me, I moved back in, promising myself that I wouldn't be in the same situation again.

Last night (about 4am) I went to get a drink out of our fridge when some mushrooms fell on the floor. I picked most of them up but I left the little bits and pieces to clean up in the morning before work - I was half asleep and didn't want to wake poor DP. Fast forward to this morning when he was up for work and I was told not to bother coming back this evening, and to go to my Mum's. He said 'I'll never learn'. I explained my reasons for not cleaning it all up there and then but he was having none of it, he has a very bad temper.

I told my Mum about the situation and she is having none of it, she says it's best I find somewhere to live of my own now since they are too crowded in the family home anyway and I have a full time job so I can afford it. I really don't know what to do, Mumsnetters :(

You see, I hadn't told the council I had moved in with my partner and my registered address is still at my Mum's so I cannot say he has kicked me out, what I have been doing is illegal!

We planned to tell the council I was there a few months back, when I was expecting, but sadly I had a stillbirth at 24 weeks and my partner inisisted there was no need.

The family home is owned outright so I'm not too sure of the rules regaring who is/isn't living there.

Not only does he not really welcome me back, but I cannot stand being treated this way any longer and I want out. I think I deserve better - i'm an intelligent young lady with a good job for 17, i'll be alright. Men are often shocked at how he comes across to me in the public eye.

Is contacting social services a good move, since I am indeed U18. However, I have heard stories about it being bad to get involved with them? I must admit I am clueless.

I earn around £250 per week. I am not sure that is enough to keep up on my own expenses for living entirely, but I don't think it's little enough to qualify for financial housing help.

I am aware I cannot rent a property by a private landlord until 18, unless I have someone over 18 as a guarentor - which my family refuse to do. I am never behind on domestic/personal payments but I can see their reasons for not wanting to.

It is so, so hard to leave him. I love him with everything I have and he is the Father to my child, yet I know it must be done and that I can have a better life without him in the picture.

Can anyone please advise me? My Mum says I can stay with her for a short period, until I get my own place, but she insists it won't be for long.

P.S, sorry for posting here. i am at work (lots of invoices to catch up on), so i shouldn't really be browsing Mumsnet

Thank you x

[ghostyslovesheep]

you don't have to lie - the council has a duty to house you - if you go into a young persons hostel/supported accommodation you will have support workers - people who can help you become self sufficient - and they will help you move into a tenancy - with their support you can get a tenancy - young people I work with have

[Creampastry]

Not sure if you have a child with him but leave him now. Cut him out of your life for good. Get a life. Get some money off him as it seems he owes you. Speak to your mum again - as long as you promise you'll leave the twat.

[storminabuttercup]

I read your post and was taken back 16 years, I was in a very similar situation, difference is you sound smarter and tougher than I ever was, I stayed for 6 years and it took a long time to get over it! Please please don't go back.

Will your mum let you stay for a few weeks to get sorted then find a room in a shared house? How long until you are 18?

[GloGirl]

Call women's aid, you have a child and are in immediate need of a home for the two of you. I'm sure you can be living with your parents and still be classified as homeless as long as no one gets them to admit they will keep you if they need to. The can agree to house you for a maximum of 3 nights for example.

Phone Shelter and Women's Aid for advice