To be annoyed at DH over this?

[Dixie2016]

Just checked our joint account and DH has spent £75 on flowers for Mothers Day! This is for his mother and me. Usually we spend about £20-25 on flowers for our own mothers and we pay from our own individual spending money. He appears to have spent £40 this year on his mum and taken it from the family funds.

I'm currently on maternity leave and £75 is a big chunk of our monthly budget. We are now short for the next 4 weeks until he gets paid again.

There are also flowers for me, so I look like a bitch for complaining. BUT there is a flower stall near us that does really great bouquets for about £20, whereas most florists charge huge amounts for quite piddly bunches of flowers at this time of year.

What is really bothering me is that he never checks our account whereas I track every penny spent and know how much we have to spend. So he will do things like this, or pop to the shop for bread and come back with £30 worth of junk we don't need and can't afford.

I told him not to book lunch ( as we can't afford it this month) before he bought the flowers .... So he was made aware that money is tight. We aren't in debt and have savings for when I am not even getting paid statutory pay but I don't want to start dipping in to them yet and not for frivolities.

It looks like £12 of the £75 is delivery charges because he left it so late to order the flowers it was too late to choose the free postage option. It's doubly frustrating because as I said the flower stall near us will be selling beautiful bouquets for £20. I've always found online florists charge more for a few stems.

Anyway I've not mentioned it again yet today but will be asking him to replace the money for his mothers flowers from his personal funds.

We budget for gifts out of the joint account, makes it so much easier all round then there are no issues about spending more or less then if we want to top it up we would do so out of our personal money.

I see 2 issues here:

1. op is v frugal (having no debts and a pot of savings is NOT hard up).
   Dp has a different attitude to money. This is something you need to sort out as a couple.

2. it sounds like op doesn't like MIL which may deserve a whole other thread.

I've saved enough to cover our expenses while I'm on mat leave. So there's enough to top up our income so we can cover our bills... It's not savings in terms of being there to pay for extras. We still have to budget.

It's not that I dislike MIL but that I wouldn't choose to spend double our usual amount on her this particular year when we have less money than usual.

Anyway it's resolved now as DH is putting the money back from his own account. Plus I've asked him to start checking our joint account before spending so he can see what funds are available.