Am I making too big a deal of this? Re: son's school reading

[ShamefulPlaceMarker]

My son is 6. He reads every day with me and we log it in to his reading diary which goes in to school each day. He also reads in school with teachers and parent helpers (me being one of them).
He is inly on the red books as he finds reading hard work.
He read a book this morning which was too hard. I pointed out in his diary that it was yellow band and too hard and that he needs a new book.
It's after school now and I have just read his reading diary from today and there is a comment saying that the book is too hard and that he needs to read at home too. It doesn't say who put the comment but it's not his teacher's writing.
I feel like this is a dig at my parenting!
I've writen below it in large letters that he does read at home every day and that the book was too hard.
I'm cross! And tempted to say something to his teacher tomorrow.
Am I making too much of a big deal of this?

I think you have totally misread the comment. "Needs to read at home" is just saying he needs to read that book at home, perhaps again, to practise a bit. It is not saying "He never reads at home, but he should be reading at home on a daily basis, because he is very behind in reading."

So YABU.

That's what I keep saying to myself hissy about scando countries. I also keep telling myself that he's the only one in his class who can ride a bike haha!
I do feel the pressure but I don't want to push him too hard and create a lifelong hatred for reading!

He will get there! My older DS plodded along at 6 and then one day it snapped and he got it!
I love the Usbourne See Inside flap books and also Captain Underpants for this age. Just leave them lying around the place...

I also keep telling myself that he's the only one in his class who can ride a bike haha!

Ah, a competitive parent. Very difficult for kids who don't fly academically. Just watch it, OP, because he can, and probably will, be affected even if you try not to show it to him directly.

I hooe so merry That's how I have now decided to take it.

It's really frustrating when you're both working so hard but I'd be inclined to fume quietly and then leave it. I get lots of 'needs to practice blending more' comments from parent helpers and I feel like writing 'WE DO! EVERY DAY!' in red marker pen. I've learned not to react to parent helper comments if they bug me and concentrate on the teacher and TA's comments.

Sounds like you're doing a great job. In my (very relaxed) opinion my DS is doing a great job with reading, but he's apparently a long way from where they're 'meant' to be by the end of Y1 which feels like it's rapidly approaching. I think about Scandinavian countries too and find it hard to get worked up - my DS's teacher said that attitude is often more important than attainment and that it's vital not to put them off.

I also took the comment to mean that he should practise the harder book at home (probably in response to you sending it back), not a comment on you not reading with him at home. I'd ask to speak to the teacher to see what they think about his reading and whether further intervention is necessary. Obviously no idea about your school bands but could it be something like he's read all the red band books (if he's been on the same band a while)?

DD is a reluctant reader and was very slow to learn phonics. We used Reading Eggs which she loved doing on the laptop and iPad. She's now steaming ahead with reading and has a good grasp of phonics. May be something to consider if your DS likes more interactive things.

merry the bike comment was throw away. I'm not competetive

DD failed the Year1 phonics test and could barely read at the end of year 1. She needs to read at school now she's in year 2 so has progressed quickly as most of her day is now reading!

I know, I know Shameful, but it just shows you are quite aware of these things and somewhere in your heart I bet you have felt the "haha" thing. It's ok, it's better to acknowledge it, and deal with it, and realise that the competitive streak is also what made you very oversensitive to the comment in the reading book. In my experience it is very very difficult NOT to be competitive with the first one at this first stage of school. It does get easier with subsequent children and even as the eldest gets older.

shameful - I wouldn't worry too much about your son being on red, but I would worry about quite a few children being on that level in the class. It would ring alarm bells with me about the standard of the teaching. Maybe something to keep an eye on.

The TA comments is a bit odd - maybe they've run out of red level? DD came back with something last week that was waaayyyy beyond her and teacher admitted that she'd been given her book last that day and there wasn't anything more suitable left that she hadn't read before.

I didn't know they did a test purple

See the teacher and stay calm. It is probably worth checking that he's heading in the right direction, but I wouldn't sweat overmuch about the books from school. Ds couldn't have been less interested and getting him to read them was a major, daily fight. I too was a fervent filler in of reading diaries.

What worked for him was reading things to him that were above his level but he enjoyed. Narnia and Just So stories did it for us, along with a catalogue of Hornby trains. Once he got interested, he did the job himself and that was never going to happen with the Oxford Reading Tree.

There are boxes of books allocated in each colour band. The kids know thier colour and choose a book themselves from the box. My ds said that this book was in the red box, so my guess is that it wasn't put back properly x

I see what you mean merry and you're right

I'm starting to realise that now with da moomix
We're currently reading the Sam Silver books together and he loves them so I encourage him to read bits, which he enjoys doing. But the school books are just a chore. There's only been one he's been in to and wanted to keep trying with. That was an usborne book.
He wears a patch over one eye for 6 hours a day, but when he reads he doesn't wear the patch. Ibthink this is another reason why he is much slower at it. Also his reception year was in a Welsh speaking school, where they learn Welsh phonetics.