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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think people realise I am quiet not "stuck up"?

10 replies

joyalf · 07/02/2016 19:00

Recently a colleague started calling me "minnie mouse" because apparently I'm really quiet & reserved & everyone agreed. I told my OH & he couldn't believe I hadn't realised I am quiet! I was quite surprised, I am not outgoing by any means but I didn't think I was noticeably quiet or shy. Then I read something about how people think quiet people are stuck up. I'm really worried people think that's me! I have a few very close friends but no kind of casual friends IYSWIM. I have struggled to make friends if I am honest. I really wanted to make friends at work & with other mums, but it's been really hard & now I think I know why! I try to be chatty & friendly but I do sometimes find it hard, I think I read a lot into other people's actions & quickly interpret behaviour to mean people don't like me or think negatively about me. This has all made me feel really bad about myself, I hate the idea of people thinking I'm stuck up & I don't know what I can do.

OP posts:
user7755 · 07/02/2016 19:05

Just wanted to say that I have the double whammy of being quiet / shy and having a southern accent in Yorkshire. Apparently this makes some people think I'm stuck up.

TBH it used to bother me but frankly, the people who know me know that I'm not. The people who think I'm stuck up can FO, as they are clearly judgey twats.

Nothing wrong with having close friends and acquaintances.

CottonFrock · 07/02/2016 19:49

Stop worrying about what other people think of you. You have absolutely no control over it. On the other hand, do ask your colleague politely but firmly to stop with the idiotic nickname.

RubbleBubble00 · 07/02/2016 19:54

I'm horribly quiet in new situations and do says it comes across as stuck up. Works fine as if been there a few years and in my comfort zone. School situations I find excruciating. My second has started reception and thought great another chance to try and make some mum friends but to no avail. Lots of groups and other parents chatting in car park but I'm on the outside again. I envy one of my close friends as she has made friends with other mums at daycare and she's only there for pick ups - don't know how she does it

Narp · 07/02/2016 19:56

it's just rude to give someone a label like Minnie Mouse. I wouldn't care about that person's opinion

SingingSamosa · 07/02/2016 19:57

I could have written that post myself! I am exactly the same, but with the added 'bonus' of a resting bitch face!! Grin

MadamDeathstare · 07/02/2016 20:52

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MadamDeathstare · 07/02/2016 20:57

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SaucyJack · 07/02/2016 20:59

It's not you with the problem, it's her. Being quiet is not a hanging offence.

Open her desk drawer a crack one day, fart in it and then slam it shut and leave it for her to find. It won't help the situation admittedly, but it can't hurt either.

hollyisalovelyname · 07/02/2016 21:12

I was shy and thought of as being 'stuck up'.
I just had no self confidence in myself and was very quiet in company.
My dh took the time to get to know me. Smile
I truly wish I had had more confidence when younger- I was lovely ( and three stone lighter!!!)

tinofbiscuits · 07/02/2016 21:24

Plenty of people are introverts. It's a shame some people can't see beyond their own personality type. There's nothing wrong with being "quiet", and at some times in history it has been the preferred personality type.

How would they feel if you called them loud and overbearing? I bet they would object, so why is it OK for them to make rude remarks about your personality?

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