To be amazed at how much money some people seem to have?

[EverythingTurnsToSkittles]

I'm talking about people who just do totally normal, average/low paid jobs, but just seem to have money coming out of their ears!

Someone that I know has one child and lives with her partner, who works in a manual low skilled job. She doesn't work. In the past year they have been to Dubai, flying first class, Cyprus, Center Parcs three times, plus several foreign weekend mini breaks in Europe. They also live in a really nice house and certainly don't seem to go without in terms of clothes, eating out, cars, etc.

Do a lot of people who live like this on a seemingly low income have family money? I have come across quite a lot of people like this recently and am intrigued about how they do it?!

I don't think you'll ever know, it's very rare that anyone will know the full extent of someone else's finances because it's non of your business.

Maybe they have inheritance, maybe they use credit, maybe they've saved hard, have generous family members, low outgoings etc. The possibilities are endless, it's pointless worrying yourself about it. There will always be people who are or appear to be better off than you, such is life.

Derelict I don't think it's pathetic to wonder about this. The thread has been about how some people seem to have more money than expected, and it's interesting. I don't think many people have sounded jealous at all, they're just intrigued or amazed.

As I said, I don't mind. I mentioned that I consider me and DP well off, because we both work and I know our pay is better than average. Therefore it surprises me that people who I thought were paid less can afford more, because I'm careful and know what things cost. It's not "how dare they" at all.

Friends who spent 10K on their bathroom, I liked it more before!

Well, if they work in the public sector, that information will be easy to work out, especially if you know their age and experience. If they're a teacher you can know it to the last pound, if you really want

No you really can't, because you don't know if they also tutor or or have other sources of earnt income.

As well as my actual job I'm a chairman of a entertainment show type thing,I have loads of teachers who also get paid by the show and it's quite good money.

Our income is small , but we luckily have no mortgage and income from a house we own.

aLso a legacy from my mum.

We run two cars and have a nice holiday every year. Every family is different.

Dsis works, bil doesn't and hasn't for a very long time, even pre-dc. She has a very good job and I reckon takes home marginally more than dh and I do combined. They've just spent £3k just on holiday accommodation and my nephews always have new toys. They blew £600 on a Labrador puppy. They have a new TV in the kitchen. Yet they say they're skint and can't afford to replace/ repair their dishwasher or buy clothes for themselves. Either their priorities are wrong or they must be maxing out their credit.

Dh and I on the other hand feel 'comfortable' and certainly are not skint, aren't particularly extravagant on ourselves or our ds, have one cheap but enjoyable caravan holiday each year in France and almost never buy things on tick. All families are different, priorities in life are different, as is approach to borrowing and debt.

Obviously different people mean different things when they say they are skint Mummy but it’s obviously a prioritisation issue or warped thinking with your DSis/BIL because the problem of not being able to afford to fix/replace a dishwasher or new clothes for adults could have been sorted by getting slightly cheaper holiday accommodation?

For people with a reasonable disposable income , things like dishwashers and TVs are not that expensive and if something breaks you just buy a new one. .

If my dishwasher broke I would replace it the same day, even if I had to live on beans for the rest of the month to afford it.

Fair enough if it doesn't bother you, MadamCroquette!

Lots of other people seem quite put out though

I agree Barbara. The logic is completely missing. In our house it goes something like this:

"Let's get a new tablet, ours is running a bit slow".

"Ds needs new school shoes and uniform this month."

"OK let's see if we can afford the tablet next month instead - it'll do for now."

"Great, that's sorted."

Funnily enough, we always afford what we need and some of what we want, even if we have to wait a while.

LittleLion - we "blew" £750 on a puppy, and could easily spend £3k on holiday accommodation. My car, however, is running on willpower and held together with string. The dishwasher is decidedly dodgy. I buy clothes off Ebay and from charity shops. I do home hair cuts.

Different priorities, but not wrong priorities. (Or are they? )

The dishwasher is up to you. You may be happy to handwash - I'm not, so will always prioritise the dishwasher.

Clothes are also up to you - also most people probably have more clothes than they need and it would only be an issue if you didn't have suitable work clothes because you had spent money elsewhere.

Same with the car. You might be able to walk/cycle/get the bus, but without my car it would take about 3 times longer than driving to get to work and I wouldn't be able to do any of my hobbies so a reliable car is pretty important to me.

If you couldn't do your job or get to work without a decent car or you didn't prioritise it by ensuring you had money available for maintaining it that would be a bit daft to spend money on other things that are probably less important.

We are the same RhodaBull. We spend a lot on holidays and evenings out, but I'm on a no-spend mission for clothes (for me) this year. And DH fixed the dishwasher last year after watching a couple of Youtube videos. We do home hair cuts as well.

We might grumble about not being able to just buy/replace stuff, but truthfully we can, although we've locked a lot of spare cash away, and both of us come from backgrounds of not replacing things unless absolutely necessary.

RhodaBull Your priorities are yours!

This thread makes me uncomfortable because I'd never spend time analysing how much money my friends have or what they spend it on in relation to me. Maybe I'm just not interested. Is this something that people do? I don't want my friends to do that (and tbh I don't think they do - it never comes up in conversation).

Most people's two main expenses when they have children are housing (rent or mortgage) and childcare (or loss of salary because one adult stays at home).

If, for whatever reason, you don't have those costs - inherited home, paid off mortgage early via thrift, luck or whatever, family helping with childcare, working opposing shifts - you will have a lot more disposable income than most.

If my car were falling apart it would definitely mean I had prioritised wrongly because I rely on it for work. But you're the only one who can judge that Rhoda, I agree. I suppose I wouldn't be quite as interested, or indeed harsh, were everything not met with "ah, well we're absolutely skint". If a family of 4 are 'skint' on £80-90k pa I would say their priorities are wrong, yes - or at least look at them again. For example, why pay for childcare when bil is in fact not working (not due to disability I hasten to add)?

People will look at me and see a lone parent who isn't apparently working and think I must be sponging and probably committing fraud (was accused of that once) but I don't get any benefits at all. Due to a combination of buying property at the right time, setting up then selling a business at the right time. Having property that has done well and having other businesses which are ticking over nicely I have a good disposable income which is based on savings and investments. Yes I also have family money which in my case means I inherited money from the family rather than having a monthly income from them. I don't discuss my income in rl.

Being skint means different things to different people for example to me being skint means not being able to afford food to someone else I know they class being skint as not being able to afford a foreign holiday 3 times a year.

I don't see why it is considered envious or mean-spirited to speculate about people's income or financial status. It is interesting. I don't begrudge anyone their status.

Arguably people should be more open about financial matters, that way we could all learn something from each other. For example if my friend tells me she has found a way to get a cheap holiday through using tesco points, it may mean I look into it for myself, whereas previously I might have assumed it wasn't worth doing. If I find someone is making a good living from investments, it may inspire me to see if I can do the same. If I find out a particular job is more lucrative than I thought I may look into training for it myself, or advise a family member so they can look into it. It is especially useful to know someone who makes money in a certain way because you can think about whether it would suit you and see how they approach it, where reading about it in the abstract is less useful.

Even those who have mountains of debt and live on that are useful to know about, because if you know you wouldn't sleep at night doing so, all envy at their lifestyle evaporates!

If I was in LittleLion's shoes I would want to help them, send them to moneysavingexpert to get budgeting advice.

But is your BIL a SAHP at the moment? Maybe they wouldn't be better off if he worked due to childcare? But yes, anyone on £80-90k should be very comfortable unless they have massive housing costs.

Due to past debt problems, I have learnt to budget and prioritise the hard way - if all your credit is suddenly taken away, you have no choice but to live on what you have so it makes me sad when people who should be doing OK seem to be struggling so I always suggest ways to save money and think about what is important.

My BIL and SIL are the same - always struggling and in the past I have tried to help them, but have now given up because they, like a lot of people, quite frankly seem to have a self destructive relationship with money and will never sort themselves out.

I'm not talking about people who don't have enough for the basics, but people who have plenty of money for the basics and a good number of extras but just seem to waste money all over the place buying crap.

We have a similar income to BIL and SIL and they have had the 'I'm so jealous at you going on holiday all the time' moan at us but they just don't see that it is all the money they spend on £40 a month iphone contracts, pub several times a week, dozens of cheap and nasty handbags (SIL) and inexplicably buying and selling cars multiple times a year (usually at a loss) (BIL) that is stopping them from affording a holiday. Instead they prefer to carry on as they are and moan about how life is sooo unfair.

I estimate that it is easily possible to save around 30% overall by shopping around and getting deals routinely, rather than just buying without thinking.

For a family on average income, that is literally thousands of pounds a year that can be saved, eg:

Always being on a good mortgage deal
Regularly switching gas and electric
Shopping around for insurances and getting cashback
Haggling with Sky or Virgin or taking freeview and Now TV instead
Shopping at Aldi and meal planning rather than getting it delivered from Ocado
Using 2 for 1 vouchers on days out
Sim only and cheaper phone, rather than latest phone on contract
Waiting for a deal when buying kindle books rather than buying at full price

etc etc etc.

So two families could appear to have very similar lifestyles but one costs quite a bit more than the other - that extra money can be put away, or used for a holiday or just to buy and do more with the same money.

I wouldn't exactly call him a sahp Barbara. There's a long back story, but suffice it to say he doesn't work in the same way a sahp does. They actually pay for the boys (school age) to go to after school club. I have no idea what bil does during that time, but it's not housework or home improvements. They do live in a nice house though. The irony is that my sister is an accountant - and by all accounts a very good one!

dimots there is no way I'm going to be more open about my sources of income after reading this thread!

I shall leave it to everyone else to speculate inaccurately.

[tongue meet cheek]

They're probably selling an aloe based product and making 10000 per hour on it. Sounds very familiar to our local seller of this who is always going on about her next amazing holiday, which has all come from joining this business! I reckon it's all on credit in these situations.

My first reaction was to wonder how they can afford so much TIME to go on all those holidays. My DH is a high earner (and I'm a 'normal' one!) but between two sets of work commitments we could never find that many weeks and weekends a year we could both go away.

People who are genuinely cash rich are usually time poor. So I'd imagine this is on credit in their case.

I've always been a bit that house value isn't taken into account when calculating taxes/benefits. If I were to inherit a £600K house from my parents then I could live in it, earn a low wage, have almost no outgoings, and claim tax credits and child benefit.

But if I inherited nothing and earned enough to rent such a house, I'd be hit with taxes to pay and no chance of any tax credits and probably not CB either. And I'd have no house to my name.

The difference between the two situations is so huge that it seems completely unfair.

right with you there, latebreakfast. We have no Great Expectations and all we have and will have is our earnings. That's why I am vehemently opposed to a local income tax (as proposed by Jeremy Corbyn). It would be so unfair to the young - and I'm being altruistic here as I am decidedly not young!

Local income tax would seem unfair on the young if it didn't take into account outgoings.

Compare a young family with a big mortgage and childcare costs, along with the costs of getting to work and feeding a family with your stereotypical old lady on a low income living next door in a mortgage free house. Who has the biggest disposable income?