To think that this is a bit mad? (PIL-related, sorry!)

[ShitFacedTinyTim]

PILS are long since retired - a decade for FIL and over 5 years for MIL. (Early retirement -they are not extremely elderly, just to get the facts in order!) There is nothing wrong with getting up early if that's your body clock, but they insist on setting the alarm and getting up at 6:45am on Sundays to 'make the most of the day'... then sit around procrastinating and repeatedly asking each other if they'd like a cup of tea for at least 5 hours and never actually leave the house until gone lunchtime. Which they have at 11:30 because of getting up so bloody early. Am staying with them now and have just settled down in their kitchen for my very first cup of (revolting, weak) tea for the beginning of the endless discussion of all the things we could do today that we will never ever do, and whilst they are sweet and harmless, I am also ready to scream.....

Yanbu, this sounds awful.
I'd like to offer a practical suggestion for the tea, get a "special" tea to help -digestion-lady parts-skin-health-whatever empty the box and pop your tea bag of choice in, then bring in handbag, my (I adore her in every other way) MIL was a weak beverage officianado, and this worked for ages.

This thread might help, OP.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/mumsnet_classics/1842939-Five-irritating-things-about-staying-with-my-inlaws

Or, maybe not.

I couldn't live with my ILs whatever the situation, the faffing and helplessness would kill me in under 48hrs

Drinks - get offered one by MIL, but she the instructs FIL to make it, if he's out you don't get offered a drink, ever
Food - takes forever to prepare, you have to answer endless questions as to whether you want a potato or not and which of the 25 dessert choices you fancy so she can defrost them. Eventually a couple of hours later after the vegetables have been cooked into submission and taken out of the pans put into the hostess trolley, taken out of the hostess trolley and put into serving dishes you get to eat. Then when you get to dessert you gt asked again what you want (nothing has been defrosted/prepared).

Early rising - I don't really have a clue but she is always complaining of being tired, then listing what she has done such as going to the supermarket at 5am (before Christmas) so it wasn't busy, cleaning all the windows, rearranging all the cupboards. If you are tired have a day off, the cupboard inspectors aren't coming around. Very rarely has she been busy doing something that needed to be done.
Faffing, to go out takes at least an hour. I have been away with her and to chose a restaurant is nearly impossible and then once we have and are sitting down she will decide that there is nothing on the menu she fancies, why then have we read every menu in town 3 times before making the choice!
I generally bite my tongue as a blow up doesn't make any difference, her DH, and DC have always let her be like this and nothing will change her.

Pre dc my pil would get up at the crack of dawn and loudly potter around in the kitchen and outside the bedroom door until we got up. Was annoying because we both worked hard in the week and they never do anything with the day. Now we have dc we dont see them til at least 9am. Then they take ages over brunch, reading papers, etc. Then the big faff about what to do with the day, by which point it is dark. We just left the house, went to the park or beach and left them to it in the end.

Oh dear, is sitting around on a non-work day procrastinating? For me that only describes putting off something you 'ought to' be doing - not an outing etc. Nothing wrong with sitting around in their own home and not all days need to be spent 100% productively. Take a book or magazine or listen to the radio.

mellojello - I would be happy to do that, but no - we are definitely going to go somewhere and do something, as soon as the United Nations Summit to work out what finishes. Unfortunately the summit usually only finishes about 40 mins before we are due to bloody leave the PILs' altogether!

Rachel - oh good god!! Yes to ALL of those!!!

Sparklesandbangs - are we related?!

They are lovely, lovely people- my PILs. Truly kind and lovely, and I think it's their anxiety to make sure that everyone is content that drives it, but aaaarrrggghh, it drives me up the wall!!!!

My PILS were obsessed with the endless breakfast and the papers and the faffing, although were never up before 9/9.30 (which drove me mad by the way). They never did anything before about 2.30 because by the time the endless breakfast finished it was nearly lunch time.

I am convinced it was their way of saving money. If they didn't go anywhere they couldn't spend anything and MIL never had time to get anything very much done or organised. You know, normal stuff like clearing out a drawer or cupboard or arranging for some decorating to be done or replacing a sofa or bit of furniture or replanting a flower bed. I remain convinced it's because having time to do any of that stuff usually involves spending pennies.