To ignore this person and think im now being stalked?

[rudolphlosthisslipper]

Fell out with a friend a couple of weeks ago. Wont go into details but it happened. She let me down when I needed her and decided I didnt need her in my life anymore.

She owed me some money so she had to come and give it to me at work. I told her to post it under the door, but claimed she couldnt so had to open the door and speak to her. She got upset and I wanted her out of the way so told her I would contact her in a few days.

Blocked her number. Gave her number to my sister in case I needed it for whatever reason in the future and she texted her.

I now keep getting texts off random numbers asking why I wont speak to her and keeps asking me to forgive her. I keep blocking her but she keeps messaging me. And im getting silent phone calls.

AIBU?

You said you'd contact her and you didn't right?

She's probably wondering why you're ghosting her and she's terribly thick skinned or trying to make amends.

Be a grown up and just reply saying "please stop contacting me, I don't want you to be in my life anymore because of XYZ reason I'm being dramatically vague about"

I agree with the person who said grow up.

I think people are being very harsh on the OP here! If the details would out her it seems perfectly OK she doesn't want to say.

I would arrange for her to meet you somewhere and get the money back, personally. Whatever the issue is, just say you don't want to discuss it, she's done x which nearly cost you your job and you no longer want a relationship with her. You just want your money and to move on.

And I'd take someone you trust with you. She sounds a bit unhinged. If she continues to harass you after that, speak to the police.

I also think the responses are a bit harsh- it doesn't sound like the situation was handled well initially but that doesn't change the fact that several missed calls and texts per day for a month is not on. It's pretty scary actually. Op, I'd send her one last message telling her not to contact you again, and that you'll be calling the police if she does. Then do it. Sounds harsh but it's best to just get on top of this, she is harassing you, and hopefully a conversation with the plod will scare her out of it.

Whocansay, OP has the money back, that isn't the issue.

OP, you said you would contact her and you didn't, that is probably why she feels it's worth trying to sort this out. Just contact her once, if necessary by email or letter, explaining briefly that you feel it's better to bring the friendship to an end and why, and asking her not to try to get in touch again.

Wow, harsh responses to the op on here. The op does not have to reveal everything about a situation to you lot you know! If you aren't happy with the amount of info given, you don't have to post.

Op, I think that a message clearly spelling out the fact that you no longer want to be friends and want her to stop contacting you would be a good idea. It sounds like she is used to being a rubbish friend and letting people down and those people forgiving her again and again. She seems to expect you to do the same, but you are under no obligation to do so. We all get to decide what we will and won't tolerate in relationships and she has clearly crossed over the lines you have drawn.

The level of contact from her at the minute is not right, and I don't think many would class it as normal. If she doesn't stop after a text message clearly telling her the friendship is over I think you would be within your rights to report her for harrassment.

I think the problem has arisen because you said you would contact her then you didn't. Obviously she is now wondering what happened after that conversation that changed your mind. Call her, explain you had no intention of contacting her again and that you don't want to be friends any more.

If you receive any unwanted calls or texts after that, reply with a standard text saying if your no contact requests are ignored and it tips into stalking, you will go to the police if necessary. imo you are nowhere near that situation at present

tbh you have helped create this drama by (a) lying about the fact you would contact her (b) getting your dsis involved in the middle somehow.

Set clear boundaries by speaking to your former friend, then block and ignore.

Rather than just ignoring her texts, just reply and say "you've let me down too often. I no longer want no further contact with you. Please respect this and stop trying to contact me. I will not be changing my mind"

She most probably thinks you need her to show contrition

She came to your work place, got upset and you wanted her gone, that's fair enough.When you said you'd contact her you should have done and made it clear you'd had enough and not to contact you again.

The persistent calls and texts are very irritating, call her and tell her you don't want contact anymore and make it clear you'll take it further if she persists.

I agree some of the earlier comments are harsh and uncalled for.

Totally random post. You can to tell us anything to make this all make sense but we need to understand and advise you? Just ignore her. Simples.

Should read *can't

I think the problem is that you haven't 'spoken' to her. For all she knows, anyone can send a text on your phone and your last conversation with her gave her a completely different message from the later texts. You need to actually speak to her.

This is the course of action that MN would usually recommended if a 'friend'had done something horrible that showed that they didn't give a shit about the OP.

Here the OP has worked it out herself, but without the backstory everyone has just decided she's unreasonable? Weird.

You are not being stalked, but this is obviously a bad situation for both you and former friend and it needs to be brought to a close. Send her the message that AlisonWunderland suggested, polite but very clear.

I agree with Bump -you sound puffed up with your own importance. Depends too what she did and how bad it was-if she just forgot something or if she was being vindictive.
Very dramatic just to block her without explaining. Also you handled it badly when you said you would be in touch.

Send polite text saying that you felt let down and its time for you to go your separate ways- and to please stop contacting you.

She's upset but she'll come to realise its not worth it. I don't think earlier responses were harsh.