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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think this situation with the school medical room is ridiculous?

57 replies

QueenofQuirkiness · 27/01/2016 16:55

Hi, my DD2 is 12 and she has to take medication numerous times per day. Her medication is kept in a locked cupboard in the school medical room - this I have no problem with as the school nurse has always been very good at making sure DD took it.
However, what I do think is a problem is that DD has told me that she has had to wait outside the medical room on multiple occasions, because the room is too full....
She explained this by saying that lots of people just go to the medical room because they are bored and know that the nurse is a bit of a soft touch and will let them stay there. They sleep on the beds or sit on the chairs and according to DD sometimes the office is too crowded to get in! Of course, some of these children could be genuinely unwell, but DD says that people always go just to skip lessons and they will boast about doing so or mention to people that 'I don't really want to do (lesson), so I will go to the nurse'
AIBU to think this is a bad situation and would it be reasonable for me to phone in to complain as DD has to have medication on a regular schedule and sometimes is unable to get to it at the proper time.

OP posts:
Original poster
QueenofQuirkiness · 27/01/2016 22:53

Thank you very much for all of your responses Smile yes the medication would have bad effects of it were to be consumed by someone who didn't need it, though I would trust my DD to keep it sad I suppose you can never really be sure with other pupils. While her need to have her medication at exactly the same time isn't incredibly urgent, it is important that she has has it at around that time and it would be detrimental to her health if she didn't take it at around those times.
I am aware that it isn't my business why so many people are in the medical room, but it does become a bit of a concern when you have a situation like this and I do wonder why quite so many children need to be in the medical room for such long periods of time, so that others who need to go have to wait.
I like the idea of keeping a record of how many times she isn't given her medication in time, I think I will encourage her to do this, and if the issue persists I will definitely be arranging a meeting to discuss the issue and try to work something more effective out.
It is a little bit of a shock that this is happening as DD only moved to high school this year, and her primary school was very different and she always got her medication on time, but I do accept that things are harder at high school, I just want to be sure that my DD is getting necessary medical care

OP posts:
WhoTheFuckIsSimon · 27/01/2016 22:57

Talk to her tutor or head of year.

As well as the bad effects it has on her health she's missing out on valuable friendship time which is an important part of school.

tassisssss · 27/01/2016 22:58

Can I ask you to talk to the school about this? You sound perfectly reasonable and she should not (regularly) have to wait. It might be that there's another option of who she can get it from (e.g. office staff or SLA).

sashh · 28/01/2016 05:10

DD has also told me that some kids stay in the medical room for hours and one girl managed to spend an entire school day sleeping on the sick bed. Which in my opinion is quite ridiculous, as DD says this girl regularly feigns illness just to skive lessons

Really your daughter doesn't know this, and nor do you.

Yes your dd should be getting her meds on time, but that is the issue, not the other children who may or may not be ill, or in need of a break from school.

Take up with the school your dd being kept waiting, in fact get her to log in her school planner the time she goes and the time she is seen.

Inertia · 28/01/2016 06:49

Your daughter isn't qualified to judge who is genuinely ill.

However, she absolutely should be able to take her medication at the correct time. If you address it with the school,you need to discuss the times when your daughter has been unable to access her medication, but not your beliefs about skivers

lljkk · 28/01/2016 10:23

it still seems to me like OP's DD should carry her own pills ideally.
It would harm other kids if they swallowed a tampon or shoved a pen down throat or did something equally daft as popping other person's pill... All just variations on using things inappropriately. We don't ban kids carrying pens & tampons.

APlaceOnTheCouch · 28/01/2016 11:34

But pens and tampons can't be confused for sweets Hmm

Enkopkaffetak · 28/01/2016 11:41

DS has a kidney issue at the moment and due to that he has spent a lot of time in the medical office with pain. Sometimes I have been called to collect him and there was 5-6 boys with him (boys school) other times there has just been him or him and one more. Really depends on how that day is going. I am thankful they do not have a set time to see if the child is better. Sometimes ds has coped with lessons again after painkillers and an hour of rest (pain is on par to kidney stones I am told) Other times he has been sent home as they felt it was not possible for him to return to lessons that day.

On the outside to any who sees him he looks healthy and as he is heavy into rugby and on the school A team most knows who he is and would really think seeing him in there = he is skiving. However he is genuinely unwell.

I would suggest you speak with nurse about your dd's concerns about having to wait outside. Depending on how big the school is it can be busy. (once I was called I missed the call and on calling back the receptionist said " they are falling like flies today" and that day was the busiest I have ever seen the medical room) There may be a way around her getting to her medication you can work out with nurse/wellfare officer.

Gileswithachainsaw · 28/01/2016 11:45

Why on earth would tablets in a blister pack with a prescription label be find used fir sweets either Confused

It's secondary school

Gileswithachainsaw · 28/01/2016 11:45

be mistaken for

SoupDragon · 28/01/2016 11:55

I am happy to send my DSs in with a single dose or paracetamol/ibuprofen/antihistamine but there is no way I would let them carry medication that could be detrimental to other children if taken. I know that the things I list could possibly be detrimental to a minority of children which is why mine only ever have taken a single dose.

Children are often lacking in any kind of common sense, yes even secondary school ones. It is perfectly believable that a child could swipe them and offer the drugs to another child "for a laugh". I have two very bright teens but by god they are stupid at times!!

I think the answer is to raise the delay with the school and see what solutions you can both come up with to ensure your DD gets her medication at the right time.

MyVisionsComeFromSoup · 28/01/2016 11:58

DD2 (faints due to a medical condition) used to have to queue up outside the medical room, until one day she fainted in the queue and gave herself concussion from the concrete floor. Matron then decided she had a "fast pass" to queue jump Smile.

She's also been allowed to carry her own medication since Y10 - current lot could potentially kill someone, but will certainly make them feel v unwell.

FWIW she could also be seen a lot lying sleeping in the medical room, takes about an hour after a faint for her to be able to stand up safely, and needs to sleep off the side effects. Rest of the time you wouldn't know there was anything wrong, and she's very likely to make a joke out of the whole situation, as that's much more face-saving than having to admit exactly how ill you are, especially around the mid-teens ages.

Grapejuicerocks · 28/01/2016 12:04

Ask the school to work with you to resolve this. It's not fair that so much of her valuable social life is being compromised.

APlaceOnTheCouch · 28/01/2016 12:25

Because Giles they might not be in the blister pack with a prescription label - they could be loose in someone's hand or on a table or in a teeny, tiny tupperware box if OP is only sending in one day's worth of medication at a time.

OhShutUpThomas · 28/01/2016 12:28

Our sick bay was like this at school.
The nurse had her favourites (usually naughty kids) and just liked hanging out with them. Genuinely.

It was ridiculous.

Gileswithachainsaw · 28/01/2016 12:29

So she sends them in in the box. as they have to be like that anyway I expect in the medical room.

if a kids going to he an idiot they have ample opportunity at home to get hold of tablets akd do the same thing

JessicasRabbit · 28/01/2016 13:32

if a kids going to he an idiot they have ample opportunity at home to get hold of tablets akd do the same thing

But that is up to the parents to deal with. Schools should be taking reasonable steps to ensure that children do not have access to medication unless it has been specifically prescribed to them. Which they do, by keeping medication in the medical room.

What needs sorting is the 20 min wait to get her medication. Would never be allowed in our school - kids get sent back to lessons or picked up asap.

Gileswithachainsaw · 28/01/2016 13:38

But they don't. not unless they go snooping in bags and stealing stuff which then becomes a police matter surely.

at that point it's theft and intent to supply or something isn't it?

a person who finds the tablets and decides to take was up to no good anyway and equally could do anything with anything they find

JessicasRabbit · 28/01/2016 14:00

Yes, Glies, and if you were dealing with adults in a workplace then that would be a reasonable approach to take. But when dealing with children, they sometimes need to be protected from themselves too.

Gileswithachainsaw · 28/01/2016 14:10

But turn it around fir a second.

imagine your child didn't have immediate access to say his/her asthma inhaler to protect someone who had no business being near their stuff in the first place.

to have a child have to wait for important medication in order to protect some thieving wannabe drug dealer.....

I understand in primary to an extent as the bags get left on pegs and they leave them half undone and show eachother the contents.

however in secondary the bags are usually in lockers or kept with the person.

if someone gets into someone else's bag there was ultimate intent there as it had to be done at exact moments....

I don't see how consideration goes towards someone who set out to steal over a child who needs medication. it's one of the first things we teach isn't it, not to take other people's stuff. if they haven't learnt that by 11 then there are serious issues

lljkk · 28/01/2016 14:25

DS used to pick up sweets from the floor of the (school) boy's changing room & eat them. Near urinals & all.

But he was 5-7yo at the time. And they looked like familiar sweets, not random tablets. He's still a minging creature but would not scoff sweets off the ground today (yr7).

I wonder what OP's DD does on a school trip, or what is PlanB if the school nurse gets delayed elsewhere for a big emergency.

APlaceOnTheCouch · 28/01/2016 14:34

But there doesn't need to be a mini drug dealer/thief in the school Giles. Op's DD could accidentally drop a tablet somewhere. YY in an ideal world that wouldn't happen. YY in an ideal world no high school pupil would be silly enough to put something unknown in their mouth. But the world isn't ideal, and the OP almost has a solution that works. She just needs to determine how often the medication is being delayed and agree a workaround with the school. Thereby keeping all DCs (including any mini cleptomaniacs) safe from unprescribed medication.

Gileswithachainsaw · 28/01/2016 14:35

But are 11 yr olds really on the habit of eating floor "food"

even assistance dogs are taught to "leave it" aren't they

APlaceOnTheCouch · 28/01/2016 14:38

What if it is on a table? much though I'd love to argue this all day - I don't think it's helping the OP and I do have to collect DS from school where hopefully he hasn't eaten anything strange from the floor, a table or anywhere else

fastdaytears · 28/01/2016 14:39

Our medical room was unsupervised and it was absolutely the place to be if you didn't fancy a lesson. Also it had good leaflets about STIs which we found totally hilarious.

Don't understand though how this can be the best solution they can come up with. Tons of kids in a secondary school will have regular medication to take won't they?