to feel ashamed about free school meals

[InspectorMontalbano]

Ashamed/nervous/worried I don't know what it is. 2 weeks ago I applied on the council website for youngest child still at primary to have free school meals, there was an online checker & we are eligible.
I haven't heard from the school yet & im worried it's because they think we shouldn't be eligible. Its a tiny village school & everyone knows everyone here. I live in a decent 3 bed semi, I work and I drive a 3 yr old (rented) car.
Split with exh last year which has dropped household income massively, he is paying rent & bills on a flat & i pay about 2/3 bills here & have taken on a lodger to help with that. Also started claiming ctc.
I feel uneasy about that and free meals - because of our decision to split I am now claiming benefits. Should I be - morally?

No one will judge.
It's like buying condoms. You think the cashier is judging you but actually they are just thinking about their dinner/what time their break is etc.

My youngest gets FSM due to her age.
If you are entitled to it then why shouldn't you. School won't judge you in the slightest.
Why should anyone worry where you shop or judge you on how much money you do or don't have?
You are doing the best you can for your child. I'd judge you. As a good parent!
Go in and ask or email school and ask when she starts to get free meals. X

No one will judge you. I was worried when we started to claim for dd aged 12 - I was unable to return to work as ds (3.7) has severe autism and learning disabilities and so our income dropped dramatically. I thought dd would be the only one etc etc as we live in a relatively rich area of south Norfolk. Turns out in her class alone there are 7 others (they all chatted about it!) It's more common than people think, loads of families are struggling at the moment.

Please claim them if they're needed. That's what they're for. You don't need to be stealing food from bins before you claim what you're entitled to.
ps there are universal FSM for younger children. So there are loads of people having them there who don't really need them.

Am I right in thinking that schools get extra money in their budget for every child on FSM? So it can be a plus for the school

Yes pupil premium

Yabu. The threshold for fsm is very low, so if you qualify there is no doubt you're deserving.

And no, the school won't judge you.

When I was teaching we were always sending letters out to parents asking them to see if they qualified for free school meals, as it means extra money for the school.
The teacher will probably not know you have them and neither will the other children and parents.

Our school always encourages those who can to do so, helps them financially

Absolutely nothing to be ashamed of. You are doing the right thing for your children.

I'm a primary school headteacher. Honestly, this is a total non issue. There will be no judgement and, in fact, nobody will particularly notice.

I know my FSM kids and I have never looked at the parents' shopping bags or checked what car they drive!

The PP money should be spend to benefit the child.. My DS has needed an assessment and support aids this came out his PP budget .. so DS got the benefit... It would of had to come out the school budget if it hadn't been on fsm 3 years ago...

I can say I have never once had teachers/ office staff be in any way judgemental in the way they have spoke to me.

As a parent I don't know who has them and who doesn't. I don't think the dc are aware either. Just take them if you need them. I would.

As adults we'd all love free lunches.