Baby won't sleep in cot

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Hi everyone sorry if this is the wrong place it's only my second post. My baby is 10 weeks, he had colic and reflux, we couldn't lay him down as he would be sick, gag and stop breathing (briefly but still scary for him and us). As a result he would only sleep upright on mine or my partners chest. Nearly 3 months later and we're still doing this. We're exhausted as we stay awake because it's not safe for us to sleep with him like this because of SIDS risk. His symptoms have improved but he still has reflux, we've been trying to put him in his crib but he screams till he's inconsolable and starts gagging again. I don't know how much of it now is reflux and how much is because he's used to sleeping on us. Does anyone have advice? I'm pretty desperate. Things we've tried - we've raised the head end of the cot, he's on ranitidine for the reflux, also on comfort formula.

DS had silent reflex when he was tiny and only slept on me (I used a sling - still do even now). I took him to a cranial osteopath and it worked wonders - worth a try?

DD was the same and now sleeps brilliantly. Going through the same with DS and he sleeps with us. He's gigantic and fully able to roll now so the only problem is me falling out of bed!

It will get better :)

Perhaps using a baby sleeping bag might help him sleep in the crib? I like using them as they can't be kicked off during the night do baby stays warm.

Just wanted to add some sympathy for you, reflux is brutal. I agree with a pp re get it under control- ranitidine worked for us for some time however, then reduced in effectiveness and omeprazole has been good for control of symptoms (to a point....think I'm guilty of wanting a 'miracle cure' which never seems to be the 12 hours sleep id like 😉). It will get better but sleep deprivation is the absolute worst.

Reflux is evil - currently in bed next to (sleeping) DS2 (8mo) who suffers with it.

We found his sleep improved once his medications were correct (ranitidine and domperidone), and once I figured out that cosleeping was the way forward. I used to hold him upright for 20min after every. single. feed. and then roll him into the bed next to me. It's still not great, but it's a hell of a lot better than it was!

You can try a homemade version by rolling up a bath towel into a sausage and putting it into a pillowcase, or using a pool noodle in the same way.

NO! That is plain dangerous advice. The deal with what you call a 'sleepyhead' is it should be made of materials that the baby can stick its whole face into yet still breath through. Ours (20 years ago) was filled with coconut fibre. Its about the baby rolling over to be face down and still breath, as the base should be made of the same easy to breath through material as the side-walls. Its about surrounding the baby, not just around its head, so bubs cant slip further down under your own bedding. A pool noodle in a pillowcase? Jesus.

Hello our baby was just like this and I was exhausted. We called in a maternity Supernanny who showed me how to put him down. We had books under the feet of the crib and a wedge under the mattress plus a diy sleepy head in the crib made of rolled cellular blankets with a sheet over them forming a u at the top. Nothing at the bottom under the feet as it actually bends stomach in half . At every nap time and at bedtime we did dummy swaddle and put in crib with hand pressed on chest firmly for.1 minute. Dark muslin over the crib . It took less than 1 day to get him to sleep in the crib. Strict bath and bedtime routine. I would not have believed it. He is now 6 months and still very clingy. Reflux is much better. I realised that half the screaming is because they have got used to being held all the time and they gag and panic. I still.use the sling quite a lot. Please pm me if I can help. Big hug it will get better.

We have the chicco next to me crib which we raise at one end, she also sleeps in the sleepyhead pod and loves it as she still feels secure. We gave in and bought the pod after 2 weeks of trying to stay up all through the night holding her, it's exhausting, you must be so tired after 10 weeks.

Try a reflux wedge and maybe a snoozzz wrap to hold the little one inclined. This really helped with my oldest. Until we used this at 7 months we co-slept as it was the only way we got any sleep. Food literally just poured out of him if he was laid down flat. Infant gaviscon and ranitidine helped with the reflux, didn't stop it but did reduce it (a bit) but most importantly it stopped it hurting him b

Good luck b

Congrats on your lovely new baby.

Dd also refused the moses basket (nothing to do with reflux). This worked for us:

Swaddle
Hot water bottle to pre warm moses basket
A garment of clothing I'd been wearing stretched over the sheet where she put her head

Dd was a January baby so it was all about making her warm and snuggly. I'm not sure if it'd help in your situation but worth a try.

Dd is still a very cuddly baby at 2 and we sneak her into bed sometimes!

I had one like this I ended up using a giant banana hammock thing for her to sleep in but I cannot remember what it was called nor the max age limit.

But it was a giant hook with a fabric hammock

Don't use a rolled up towel or pool noodle. They are not safe breath throughable fabrics!

Can he have a daytime nap in a car seat or buggy?
With the buggy, just lift his head a bit, so nowhere near sitting, but not quite flat.

Dd hated napping in her cot, but happily slept in the bouncy chair thing.

Even now, she sleeps all night in the cot, but only 'sit up sleep' in the day. Carseat, buggy, chair/sofa. Me. Anything apart from cot for daytime.

Amby hammock and up to a year with two springs, knew I would remember

Thanks everyone. We've tried quite a lot as i've been pretty desperate. We have an Arms Reach Co-sleeper cot (but that's the one he won't go in even though it's raised one end). He falls asleep on us and sometimes if he's in a deep sleep we'll put him down in a U pillow propped up with cushions to keep him upright but he usually wakes up within an hour because of the reflux. We've also got a Sleepyhead which is great but also won't work because it's flat. We've also got an Amby hammock but he's still sick in that (I've wasted so much money). I can't find anything that he's comfortable in other than almost completely upright in our arms, he's most happy in my baby carrier as he's completely upright against my chest.

So every night he sleeps on my chest but then he goes mad if he can't have my boob for comfort, so we end up in a ridiculous position with him hanging off my boob while i'm trying to keep him upright so he doesn't reflux. I now have stretch Armstrong nipples (sorry if that's TMI). And i'm stuck like that every night, wide awake for 6 hours. I'm counting down the days till he grows out of it but i've heard it could be as long as a year and i'm not sure I can handle that.

Does anyone know what I can expect from medication? The Ranitidine has stopped his screaming because i'm guessing he still refluxes but it doesn't burn as much. But it still wakes him and makes him really uncomfortable when he's gagging. I thought all of the medications did something similar, they don't stop the reflux itself just reduce the amount of stomach acid? Has anyone had medication that actually stopped it completely? Absofrigginlootly did Omeprazole do this? Lalala82 you might be right i'm probably expecting too much.

I also think i'll do what you suggest Haribofrenzy and check if it's dairy intolerance. He doesn't have all the symptoms but you never know. And d270r0 I think i'll try him on his side again, i've tried before but not put him in that position when he's been in a deep sleep.

Oriunda i've been thinking about a cranial osteopath as LO had quite a traumatic birth with forceps that injured him then ventouse. It's generally considered quackery but so many people swear by it i'm considering it, just worried it will be more money down the drain.

Olympicsrock where did you find the supernanny? I'm thinking of something like that, a sleep trainer/night nurse type person.

Search for a cranial osteopath who treats babies, and ideally recommended. Where I am there's one chap who so many people go to and he was very honest and told that it would either work after 3 sessions, or not, so I didn't need to worry about wasting money. As it was it helped straight away.

Been there op.

Some things I would look at are, make sure the ranitidine is being increased with his weight. Look at omperazole if it's not working. If that doesn't work look at a cows milk protein allergy (my ds had this as a baby and was on milk free formula called Neocate on prescription). If you're breastfeeding you need to give up dairy and possibly soya (40% are still allergic to soya 90% to goats milk). Get a heart beat toy like a Slumber bear, worked wonders.

Have you tried infant gaviscon. It doesn't completely stop the sick but it thickens the milk in the tummy so slightly harder to throw up. A bit of a nuisance if EBF. We used a wedge and this babyreflux.co.uk/collections/sleep-positioners/products/snoozzz-sleep-wrap-positioner
To hold DS inclined. Same company has wedges of varying angles. There seems to be more products on the website that might be helpful that weren't there 2+ years ago when we were going through this.

A reclining nursing chair might work? Then you could maybe (relatively) comfortably get some sleep whilst holding him upright, and you could slowly recline it more and more night by night so he gets used to lying flatter, even if still on you?

I know it's soul-destroying when they'll obly sleep in the sling, and you feel like you're making a rod for your own back, but in my experience, most babies do grow out of this. Chin up and you have my sympathies!

Sorry just saw your reply. No the omeprazole didn't stop DD from having reflux per se, I could still hear the milk washing back up her throat and she still suffered a lot with hiccups, but once the omeprazole took full effect (at 20mg dose (!) after about 4-5 weeks I think) it didn't seem to bother her anymore because the burning stopped.

The fact that your ?10 week old baby is still wanting to comfort suck all night suggests that they're still in a bit of pain. Are you still just using Ranitidine? If so, maybe a trial of omeprazole would help?

I don't have much advice re the sleeping thing because like I said, after the first 12 weeks of DH and I taking it in turns to sit up and hold her whilst trying desperately to stay awake we couldn't do it anymore. So she slept upright on my chest while I slept. I set up a safe cosleeping environment (she my description in my earlier post up thread) and she had developed very good head control by then so I felt comfortable with our choice. To be honest there wasn't much choice to make by that point, it was either that we got some sleep or we all went quite literally mad. DD also used to like to sleep on my chest with my boob in her mouth and I sort of learnt how to hold her in an arm lock with my fingers intertwined and she and I never moved a muscle. Crazy isn't it?! But you do anything for sleep!!

Like I said though once symtom control was sorted (ie no pain) then I could get DD to lie NEXT to me in bed at around 5.5 months (although we were in the throws of the 4 month sleep regression which was hell!!!!!)

Things are soooooooo much better now though. She has an awful feed to sleep habit (reflux babies do!) that I need to address and am thinking of doing the Jay Gordon method. But she is asleep in her cot right now next to me (side off, naturally!) and I'm just about to lie down on my own in my own bit of bed space which I never would have believed at 3 months so please don't despair! This will end at some point! Your baby won't be lying on your chest when they're 18!!!!

Ps, I wouldn't use a chair because of the chance of the baby getting wedged against the arm rest.

Set up a safe co sleeping environment in the middle of a double bed, pillows behind you back but away from baby, mattress on the floor if needed so no worries about falling out of bed! And I actually use/d a sleeping bag for myself so no duvet near the baby

Also, as I said on another thread recently, not all of DD need for closeness, comfort feeding etc was down to the reflux. Looking back I can see that some of it was/is her personality.

Google Dr Seara high needs baby to see if any of it rings true. DD has 12/12 of the personally traits! Some babies just NEED you more

*Dr Sears