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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be a bit hmm?

29 replies

MustangMillie · 20/01/2016 16:40

After a few drinks consumed on first date last night date said he thought I looked beautiful. He followed this up on second date saying I looked pretty. While I'm completely flattered to hear this, I am actually neither of these things!

Would you lot take it as a compliment? It was nice to hear as I had made an effort both times but equally a bit Hmm as I know that it's not true! Just raised my suspicions a little

NB: the guy who was saying all this is lovely but very young (well, 21) and has not had a girlfriend before. A bit suspicious he feels he has to say things like that to get women to like him/to get a girlfriend! The adage "flattery will get you everywhere" comes to mind Smile

OP posts:
MustangMillie · 20/01/2016 18:17

Sweetdreams can I ask how you dealt with your BDD please?

OP posts:
Jux · 20/01/2016 18:21

Well, in the end, you just make the best of what you have, and after a while you judge yourself in the confines of that.

(I always feel rather scared of beautiful women.)

Jux · 20/01/2016 18:25

Also, beauty really is in the eye of the beholder. In my youth I had many compliments, but never actually saw anything worth having in myself. At my age now, I see old photos and can see that I was OK, not fat and ugly like I thought I was, and sometimes I even wonder what sort of life I could have had if I had believed in myself. That's the key thing, and once you've got that self-belief you won't worry about what you look like.

Oh, and tell me how you got it, when you do!

AcrossthePond55 · 20/01/2016 18:28

This actually made me smile. I, too, had never been happy with my looks. I'm pretty average looking, but I do 'pay for dressing', meaning there are times with the right clothes, hair, and makeup I look in the mirror and think 'not half bad'.

DH thinks I am beautiful. He always has, he always will. He thinks that Angelina has nothing on me. I'm old enough to be her mother (if I started young, that is). And I love him for it.

So don't discount what this young man says. It may very well be to him that you are beautiful.

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