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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Ps4 Grrrr

68 replies

Lovelychick · 15/01/2016 10:56

Hi,
I am new to this and need advise my partner is always on his playstation after doing 12hrs at work and when I tell him I don't want him on it his response is that he needs to unwind. Aibu to consider sending his ps4 to a charity shop

OP posts:
OliviaDunham · 15/01/2016 11:22

My DH also plays a lot of PS4, I just leave him to it and do what I want to do, don't see the problem personally. If it's getting in the way of your sex life, just take a more direct approach Wink

Original poster
Lovelychick · 15/01/2016 11:23

I tried but it's like he isn't interested in sex

OP posts:
SomebodySedateMe · 15/01/2016 11:26

How about sitting down like adults and taking about the situation?

DH spends time on his PS4 once any other little jobs are done. It's up to him how he wants to unwind.

Epilepsyhelp · 15/01/2016 11:26

It's not your ps4, gifts belong to the recipient.

I would not give such a flat ultimatum, but you could ask him to reduce the hours he plays, limit himself to an hour a night or whatever.

Might not work though, if he's hooked on a game. Do you have DC?

Original poster
Lovelychick · 15/01/2016 11:34

Yes I have 2 kids and to be honest he doesn't go on it while they are awake

OP posts:
Original poster
Lovelychick · 15/01/2016 11:36

The fact I spent money on some sexy lingerie and he wasn't interested upset me

OP posts:
JohnLuther · 15/01/2016 11:39

Just behave like an adult and talk to him.

Original poster
Lovelychick · 15/01/2016 11:39

I tried to talk to him

OP posts:
Original poster
Lovelychick · 15/01/2016 11:41

All I want is my boyfriend to show me at least a few days attention then him going on his ps4 wouldn't be such a bad thing

OP posts:
weeblueberry · 15/01/2016 11:46

And what happened when you tried to talk to him....?

If you told him it was upsetting you and he ignored you and went right back on well there's your answer.

As for the lingerie situation he might just not well have been in the mood when you showed him?

Original poster
Lovelychick · 15/01/2016 11:50

He is never in the mood however I did catch him looking at them one day when i came in from shopping

OP posts:
sandythesquirrel · 15/01/2016 11:54

He is being unreasonable to do it for 4 hours. - One hour to One and half hours is fine. You need to have a grown up chat and say you want to spend time with him. You are letting him get away with it, so you need to put your foot down a bit more.

If you give him the option of a PS4 or you.. the PS4 doesn't nag him or complain about being ignored. The ultimatum might backfire on you. Likewise if you get rid of it - you aren't married so it is not common property.

My dh, also likes to unwind after putting ds to sleep. This can be tv or playing Ipad. But he knows better that there are times I just want us to have a cuppa and chat.

He tried earlier on in our marriage, and when he had gone to bed, I smashed his iphone and he got the message. It was good for us overall. I apologised for breaking his prize possession he apologised for making me so angry by spending too much time on his iphone playing games. Things changed for the better.

Now, I have always threatened to smash his Ipad if he prefers its company to me. And he knows I will follow through on it.

Original poster
Lovelychick · 15/01/2016 11:54

I joked with him by saying if he wants to wear them he can but he had a go at me saying it's not funny

OP posts:
weeblueberry · 15/01/2016 11:57

He is never in the mood

Was this an issue before the PS4? Because if your sex drives aren't compatible then that's a whole other thing isn't it?

Original poster
Lovelychick · 15/01/2016 11:59

I never hear him say that she is fit or wow what a stunner but he does tend to comment on wow that outfit looks nice

OP posts:
Original poster
Lovelychick · 15/01/2016 12:00

Which I don't mind but I find a bit strange at the same time

OP posts:
PaulAnkaTheDog · 15/01/2016 12:00

I'd cringe if a guy used either of those phrases.

Original poster
Lovelychick · 15/01/2016 12:03

And I have noticed when he is playing fallout or destiny his character is a woman

OP posts:
weeblueberry · 15/01/2016 12:03

How long have you been together?

Original poster
Lovelychick · 15/01/2016 12:03

Going on 8yrs

OP posts:
weeblueberry · 15/01/2016 12:04

Yeah the fact he plays as a female character means nothing. Lots of men do.

Original poster
Lovelychick · 15/01/2016 12:05

He is obsessed with my clothes

OP posts:
PaulAnkaTheDog · 15/01/2016 12:06

Playing as a female character means nothing. Confused

Original poster
Lovelychick · 15/01/2016 12:06

And I have noticed a few of my underwear have gone

OP posts:
EponasWildDaughter · 15/01/2016 12:06

So now you're saying ... what? You think he fantasises about dressing up as a woman? Being a woman?

Say what you mean.

Or this a wind up